


It Feels Like I'm Human Again

by HeartOnATrigger



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-17 22:19:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 47,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21750631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeartOnATrigger/pseuds/HeartOnATrigger
Summary: New Moon AU.When the Cullens Leave, Bella doesn't fall into a deep depressive state, and instead takes charge of her life, improving her relationship with her father and friends. Through extreme circumstances, Angela and Jessica are exposed to the supernatural world, and they, along with Bella, work with the wolf pack to protect Forks from an impending vampire threat.
Relationships: Bella Swan & Angela Weber, Bella Swan & Charlie Swan, Jessica Stanley & Bella Swan
Comments: 13
Kudos: 52





	1. One

**ONE**

* * *

Bella started at the cracks in her ceiling forlornly, trying to ignore the empty feeling in the pit of her stomach. She'd been laying in bed for four days now, and besides drinking the water her father her and picking over the sandwiches he made, she hadn't moved much. She was still in the same clothes from four days ago, from when Sam Uley had found her in the woods and brought her home. The only consolation was that her shoes were off, although it wasn't like her bed could get any worse. She, and her sheets, were covered in dirt, leaves, and splashes of mud. Her body felt gross, her skin itchy, but she lacked the energy to roll out of bed and do something about it.

The four days spent in bed had been spent trying not to think about her current situation, but then thinking about it anyways, the thoughts playing on repeat in her head. Her father kept gently asking her what happened, but Bella had just shaken her head and remained silent. How could she explain to her father that she had been played by a family of vampires?

Laying in bed had given her a lot of time to think, and once she got going, she couldn't stop. She began to analyze every interaction that she had with the Cullens, and she finally saw what made her father so wary of Edward.

A few years ago, when Bella was still living in Arizona with her mom, she'd had to write a paper for health class about toxic and abusive relationships. She'd spent weeks going through databases to find information on warning signs, how to spot them, and how to safely remove oneself from the situation. After working her ass off on that paper, the information was permanently ingrained in her head.

However, it was like moving to Forks had made her forget everything she'd learned.

After spending four days curled up into a ball, Bella was forced to confront the very real, very unhealthy nature of her relationship with Edward. She was always guilted into wearing things she didn't want to wear, going places where she didn't want to go, not being allowed to drive herself anywhere or spend time with who she wanted, being told that she couldn't make her own choices and that it was "for her own good".

Edward and his family had done all of those things to her, and she never questioned it, just kept retreating further and further into herself so she wouldn't upset them.

Every interaction with the Cullens had made her feel like she was walking through a field of landmines, heart beating furiously in her chest as she worked to avoid any explosions.

She wore what Alice told her to wear because it made the smaller girl happy. She let Edward choose how she got around town and when she could go out, let him dictate when it was time for her to eat and sleep, just to appease him. Gorging herself on Esme's food so that her feelings wouldn't get hurt. Not expressing her concerns over Emmett manhandling her, or about how poorly Rosalie treated her.

Bella spent a year of her life being okay with not being treated with basic human decency. Didn't she deserve happiness? Didn't she deserve respect?

Edward treated her like she was made of glass, as if she would die without him guiding her through life. But being human didn't make her invalid. She survived without the Cullens for, what, sixteen years of her life? Bella seriously doubted that she'd spontaneously combust without being babysat.

Inhaling deeply, Bella gagged as her nostrils filled with the awful stench of her body odor, reminding her that she hadn't showered in several days and that she was currently laying in a pile of her own filth. She supposed that going so long without a shower wasn't really doing much to prove that she didn't need a babysitter.

Bella sat up slowly, closing her eyes for a second to get herself together. The room spun a bit, no doubt a result of her suddenly being upright after being horizontal for so long. She reached for the glass of water her father had placed on the bedside table and sipped it slowly, humming contentedly at the wall the cool liquid slid down her dry throat.

She placed the glass back down and slowly got to her feet, stretching her leg muscles, grimacing at the mud print she left on her sheets. Bella tugged off her clothes, tossing them in the laundry hamper, then took the sheets and blanket off her bed. Peeling both off proved to be a challenge as she struggled not to make an even bigger mess on the floor. After stuffing the filthy fabrics away, Bella grabbed her bag of toiletries, a towel and rag, and slipped into the bathroom.

The scorching hot shower that followed was downright heavenly, dirt and leaves washing away down the drain. The scent of her strawberry shampoo and conditioner was a comfort, made her feel better already as her hair improved from its previous matted and sweaty state. She washed herself thoroughly, enjoying the feeling of the water beating into her skin.

The shower gave her time to think about what she was going to do next.

She wouldn't heal from Cullen induced damage right away, but recognizing the issue and citing several examples was the first step to recovery. Now that she could see how toxic Edward and his family were, she was better equipped to protect herself should they ever decide to cross paths with her again.

The main issue was making sure she didn't fall for their same tricks again.

Her self esteem was low, had been for several years, and Edward had made her feel special; the handsome, heartthrob of the school focusing on the plain Jane. She had fallen for his charm hook, line, and sinker. She supposed it was also due to his natural vampiric nature; vampires were natural predators, and so it made sense that Edward was able to mold her to easily without her even realizing. All they had to do was dazzle her and she was putty in their hands.

And now, with their sudden departure, she had collapsed in on herself and become bedridden, as if going through withdrawal. Normal breakups shouldn't be like this. She shouldn't have been borderline comatose without them, as if their presence was her only lifeline.

The water started to get cold, so Bella turned the shower off and got out, wrapping the fluffy towel around her. Standing in front of the sink, Bella wiped at the mirror to clear the fog. Plugging in the blowdryer, she turned it on low and used the brush to slowly work the tangles out of her hair as she dried it. Finally clean and put together, her hair fell in waves down her back.

After brushing her teeth and cleaning up her hair, Bella went back to her room and turned on the lights, inhaling sharply at the stinging sensation in her eyes. She'd been in the dark for way too long.

The next forty five minutes were spent moisturizing, getting dressed, and making her room less like a landfill. She picked up the dirty clothes on the floor and put them in the hamper, and moved the hamper by the door so that she could do laundry later. She put fresh sheets on her bed, smoothing out the wrinkles. As Bella moved to go open the window, she looked at herself in the floor length mirror hanging from her closet door.

The dark blue jeans, forest green sweater, and dark brown ankle boots was a decent ensemble, and she was impressed that had the balls to wear shoes with a heel, although the heel wasn't very large. Just two inches, and thick, so she was sure she wouldn't fall too much. While she still looked pale and tired, she looked significantly less dead.

Bella opened the curtains and the blinds, allowing thin rays of sunshine to filter in through the room. The ground was wet, telling Bella that it had rained very recently, but the roads didn't look too bad. After being in the house for four days, Bella actually wanted to go outside and get some fresh air, although she doubted her father would let her take another walk after what happened the last time. She wondered if Charlie would want to go out with her, maybe get something to eat.

Just as she turned away from the window with the intent of going downstairs to find him, her door opened, and Charlie stood in the doorway, gaping at her.

They stared at each other for a moment before Bella finally broke the moment with a hoarse, "Hey."

Charlie crossed her bedroom in just four steps and pulled her into a hug, and that's when the dam broke. Bella sobbed into his chest, finally letting herself truly feel for the first time in a while. Bella felt wetness seeping onto her shoulder, and she guessed that he was crying, too.

Charlie finally let her go, pulling back, keeping his hands on her arms.

"Hey," he whispered back.

Bella cleared her throat and wiped her face, mustering up a sheepish smile. "I was just about to come find you. I was wondering if you wanted to go out for dinner. Or I could cook! Whichever one yo -"

"Let's go out!" Charlie said. "And we don't have to go to The Lodge. We can go anywhere. Wherever you want to go."

"We could go to that new diner in Port Angeles?" Bella suggested. "I'm kind of in the mood to eat my weight in pancakes."

* * *

Charlie stared at his daughter as she browsed the menu.

After their little cry session, Charlie had gotten dressed and they headed out. He'd made Bella grab a jacket since her raincoat was currently soiled, sitting in her laundry hamper. They'd taken his cruiser to the diner, and he hadn't protested when Bella turned on the radio, flicking through the stations. It was the most he'd seen her move in four days, and he didn't want her to shut down again. She'd finally settled on listening to some old nineties music, bobbing her head to the beat.

It was like she had become an entirely different person in the hour and a half that she'd been out of bed.

Four days ago, when he'd come home and he hadn't been there, he wasn't really phased at first. It was normal for Bella to spend time with the Cullens, specifically Edward and Alice, before coming home. But then he saw her note on the kitchen table about how she'd gone out for a walk, and that was when the panic set in. Bella liked nature good enough, but she was clumsy and not very athletic, so she kept her outdoor activities to a minimum. For her to suddenly take an interest in the environmental scenery? Incredibly shady. His feeling of dread had gotten even worse when she didn't answer any of his calls, and it had gotten dark outside.

Desperate to know that she was safe and not dead in a ditch somewhere, Charlie had called everyone he could: other police officers, Billy, Harry, the neighbors, and the Cullens.

Imagine his surprise when Dr. Cullen and Alice's phone numbers were found to be disconnected.

After the most emotionally and mentally draining few hours of his life, Sam Uley, bless his soul, had returned from the woods with Bella in his arms, saying that he'd found her laying on the ground. Dr. Gerandy had looked her over, said she was fine, but Charlie knew that the wounds weren't physical. As angry as he was at the Cullens for leaving so suddenly, he couldn't focus on them right away, he just wanted to make sure Bella stopped shivering and ate something.

The next four days after that had been stressful. Bella refused to get out of bed, just laid there, curled up in the fetal position. She wouldn't talk, just stared at him blankly when he spoke to her. After the first two days, Charlie called Sue over to help him get Bella in the shower, and for a second it seemed like she would go, but when Charlie had muttered to Sue about sending Bella back to Renee, she threw a fit, screaming and swinging on them. Charlie and Sue resolved to let her sit for a bit more.

Every night, Charlie was jerked awake by the sound of Bella's agonized screams, the nightmares visiting her every night. And every night without fail he'd go in and sit with her until she fell back asleep. She drank the water he gave her and ate a few bites of the sandwiches, but after that she'd flop back down on her soiled sheets.

So it had been quite surprising when, as he was washing his breakfast dishes this morning, he heard the shower turn on.

Charlie may not be the best at expressing emotion, and there was some distance between him and his daughter, but he was a teenager himself once, and he knew that Bella would never open up if he darted up the stairs that very second to harass her. So he'd paced the hallway by the door and attempted to watch TV, before he finally cracked and went to go see if she was up and about.

Seeing her standing there, dressed, clean, and looking less dead than before had made emotion swell in his chest. He didn't even have to think twice about going out for dinner, Bella didn't need to be cooped up indoors anymore than she already has.

When they'd gotten to the diner, Bella had quietly asked for a table outside, and at Charlie's questioning glance, she'd flushed and explained that she needed some fresh air.

Just as Charlie opened his mouth to speak to Bella, the waiter arrived.

"Good evening, my name is Marian and I'll be your server for today!" the woman smiled at them. "Can I start you two off with something to drink?"

"Orange juice, please," Bella said.

"Same for me."

"Alrighty!" Marian scribbles their drink orders down on her notepad. "And were you guys ready to order, or did you need some more time to look over the menu?"

"Can we get some more time, please?" Charlie asked, realizing that, in analyzing Bella's actions this morning, he hadn't even glanced at the menu.

"Of course! I'll have your drinks out in a minute."

Marian leaves, and Bella and Charlie are left alone.

The diner, Corner House Restaurant, was pretty busy, not overflowing with customers, but definitely bringing in a good amount of business. They weren't the only ones outside; a few other people were sitting out on the patio that connected to the diner. It was a pleasant enough day outside. The sun was out, but it wasn't too hot, the rain from last night making the day cool, but not too chilly.

As they wait for their drinks, both father and daughter wonder what to say.

"I'm sorry," Bella blurted.

"What?" Charlie jumped, not expecting the abrupt apology.

"You tried to warn me that Edward was bad news, and I didn't listen. I thought that just because I've been taking care of myself and my mother since I was a kid that I was mature enough to handle a relationship, but I was wrong. If anything, that type of upbringing made me even more vulnerable because I didn't really know what to expect. I should have listened to you, and then I went and made you panic by going into the woods."

"I'm not mad at you Bella," Charlie assured her, reaching across the table to grab her hand. Both of them were bad with emotions, but now they had to try. Bella's downward spiral and Charlie's fretting weren't going to come to an end until they talked it out. "I'm mad at the Cullens for hurting you. When I got home that day, I knew you weren't really on a walk, at least not by your own choice. You're not an athlete, Bells," they both gave a watery chuckle, "and I knew that there was no way you were out for a hike."

"That day that I went in the woods, Edward said he wanted to speak with me. We went for a walk on the trail, the one right behind our house. A few minutes in we stopped, and that's when Edward told me that he and his family were leaving. I didn't understand what he meant at first, but then he said that he and his family were moving and that he wanted to break up with me. He, um, told me that he didn't want me, and that he didn't really care for me in the first place, and that my mind was weak, so I'd forget him quickly, as if he were never here."

Charlie's hand tightened around hers, his face turning bright red in anger.

Bella continued, "I asked about Alice and the others, because I hadn't seen them since my birthday party. I wanted to know why they didn't say goodbye, and he said that they all thought a clean break would be best. He left me in the woods then, and I tried to follow him but, you know, he's fast and I'm clumsy. I got lost in the woods, and then I tripped, and I didn't get back up. That's how Sam found me."

"That piece of shit," Charlie growled. "That _rat bastard!_ "

Charlie's filled with the intense urge to hunt down Edward Cullen and strangle the life out of him, just wrap his hands around the arrogant little prick's throat and squeeze.

"Dad, I'm okay," Bella insists. "I mean, not okay, but I'll get there. I just...laying in bed, I had to confront a lot of things that I had been ignoring for months, like the fact that Edward and I's relationship wasn't healthy."

Marian returns with their drinks, and asks if they're ready to order.

Bella asks for a stack of buttermilk pancakes with a side of scrambled eggs and sausage. Charlie, originally going to order their meat lover's option, decided that he didn't need all that pork, and instead ordered the chicken and waffles. Marian smiles at them and disappears to go put their order in.

"You don't have to tell me everything right now if you don't want to," Charlie said, breaking the silence. "But I am here for you when you're ready."

Bella smiles, and Charlie's heart breaks because he can't remember the last time her smile was that genuine; certainly not when she was with Edward.

"Thanks, Dad. I, uh, was also wondering if you knew about any programs that help... battered women that have gotten out of bad relationships."

"Did he hit you?!" Charlie demands, hand instinctively going to his waist, only to realize that he'd left his gun at home on the rack.

"No!" Bella assures him. "No, Edward didn't hit me. I swear, Dad, he never hit me." Charlie slowly relaxes in his chair, and she continues. "I suppose battered wasn't the best word to use. Edward was controlling, Dad. He chose when I got to eat, when I slept, who I talked to. That's why I never really hung out with Jacob as much as I wanted to last year, because Edward didn't like it. I was living my life by his rules for so long, and it feels like I've forgotten who I really am, and I think one of those programs can help me, you know? Help me figure out how to heal, how to move on and forget about him. I just... I'm scared that if I don't get better, if I don't learn how to let him go, then if I ever see him again, or run into another guy like that, I'll be right back where I started."

Charlie was silent for a moment, taking it all in. His eyes watered with tears he refused to shed; this wasn't about him right now. He hated himself for not noticing. Sure, he'd had a bad feeling about Edward since the beginning, but he had felt weird attempting to go to Bella about it, because he'd been so out of place in her life. He only saw Bella once a year, if that, and as she got older the visits dwindled impossibly more. Now, Bella was a teenager, and he had missed out on so much that he didn't know if she'd be receptive to his advice on her love life.

He knew that he didn't have the best track record himself, seeing as how he'd only been married once and his wife and left in a flurry of harsh words and hadn't looked back, and he hadn't exactly been active on the dating scene since then. But he still cared for Bella, and he should have been more open and observant so she could have avoided Edward altogether.

"I can hear you, Dad, and it's not your fault. Edward had everyone fooled. It was so easy to get caught up with him. When I started school, Jessica talked about him like he was this forbidden treasure, and I felt special when he focused his attention on me, especially since he ignored every other girl. I thought that maybe I wasn't as plain as I thought, and so I let him, and Alice, dictate my life because I wanted to fit into their world. I wanted his family to like me, I wanted to be one of them. I've never had a guy chase after me like Edward did, so I was flattered. I never expected everything to get so crazy."

"It's not your fault," Charlie says gently. "Both of us got blindsided by the Cullens. Ever since Carlisle moved here I had a blind sense of hero worship towards him. He was a great doctor that was willing to take a pay cut to work here, and Alice was always so charming... even though I didn't like Edward, I convinced myself that there wasn't anything wrong. We both got caught up in the moment." The two shared a watery smile, and for the first time in a long time, it felt like everything was going to be alright. "I'll call the station tomorrow morning, let them know I'll be coming back to work soon, and I'll get the information for the battered women programs."

Once their food arrived, Bella and Charlie spent the rest of the evening talking, making up for lost time.

* * *

That night, after taking another shower, Bella collapsed into bed, physically and emotionally drained. After spending so many years bottling up her true emotions while living with Renee, having to open up to Charlie had taken a lot out of her. She didn't regret it, not at all, but she felt drained.

Bella scooted under the covers, tugging the blanket up to her chin.

It had been nice to sit with her father and talk. She wondered why they didn't do it more often. They had a similar sense of humor, and Bella was sure that, if they spent more time together, she'd find other things they had in common. She'd bring that up with him soon, maybe find something that they could do together.

Despite all the talking she did today, she knew that opening up about her relationship with Edward was just the beginning. She needed to go to those programs, needed to do a lot of things, like apologize to Billy for not taking him seriously when he tried to warn her about the Cullens; apologize to Jessica and Angela for being such a crappy friend; apologize to Jake for not spending time with him and letting Edward dictate who she could hang out with; and hunt down Sam to thank him for coming to search the woods for her.

She still felt guilt for sending the entire town into a panic. As the chief's daughter, she knew that her disappearance had been made a top priority, especially since damn near everyone around knew how clumsy she was; for all they knew, she could've fallen down a hill and shattered every bone in her body. And the people loved her father, so of course they wanted to help.

Bella wondered how her life could be so chaotic. Sometimes it still felt like some fever dream. When living in Arizona, this teen drama and angst was never an issue for her. She had a small group of people she was friendly with, but she kept to herself and took care of the house and did homework. Never dating anyone and not going out prevented her from getting caught up in the dramatics of her fellow peers. While the girls in her grade freaked out about prom, losing their virginities, and the occasional pregnancy, Bella freaked out about her mom quitting yet another job on a whim.

She supposed it was good that she never had to worry about getting pregnant and having to explain it to her mother, but at the same time, Bella felt like she missed out. Having to care for her mother all the time, Bella realized that she never really got the chance to be a kid. The only time she ever got to take a break from being a caretaker was when she was visiting her father. Bella always looked back on those times fondly, as those weeks during the summer had been filled with trips to the beach, cookouts, and playing with her friends on the reservation. She faintly remembers making mud pies with Jacob, much to the dismay of his older sisters. Bella realized that she had always loved Forks, deep down, but hadn't been able to stay too long since her mother needed her. Now that Phil was in the picture, Bella was free to fade away from her mother's side.

Sighing, Bella rolled over onto her side, gazing out the window.

After being stationary for four days, she wasn't very tired. Every time she closed her eyes to try to sleep, they flew back open. Her mind kept spinning, and Bella didn't want to think anymore, she just wanted _sleep_.

Giving up, Bella pushed the covers back and got up, slinking down the hallway and down the stairs. Halfway down, she could see the light from the TV in the living room, and when she peeked her head around the corner, she saw her Dad in his pajamas, watching reruns of _Malcom In The Middle_.

When Bella's foot made contact with the last step, it moaned loudly under her weight, and Charlie's head swiveled towards her. Bella blushed and shuffled to the living room, twisting her fingers together nervously.

"Can...can I watch with you?" Bella asked.

Charlie smiled and waved her over, scooting over on the couch to make room for her. Bella sat next to him, drawing her knees up to her chest.

Sitting there with her father, just enjoying each other's company, Bella felt the urge to just spill every thought she's ever had. Despite living with Renee for most of her life, she felt closer to her father. She and her dad were so much alike, and she felt like he would understand anything she'd tell him, opposed to her mother, who, while she did try her best, wasn't always checked in mentally and emotionally to Bella's needs. In fact, that was why she was so adamant about not going back to her mother's like her father had suggested.

"I asked to live with you when I was eight," Bella says, and Charlie tenses next to her.

"What?"

"When I was eight," Bella murmurs. "I told mom that I didn't want to live in Arizona with her, I wanted to come to Forks with you. I missed you. She said she'd call you, and then a few days later she said that you didn't want me here so I didn't ask again. I thought that maybe you just didn't want a kid full time, and I understood, so I settled for the summer visits."

" _Bells_ ," Charlie says, voice cracking. Bella drags her teary eyes up to meet his, fingers playing with loose thread in the couch cushions. "Bells, that's not true!"

"I know that now," Bella replies, throat thick with emotion. "I just...for years I thought you didn't want me here long term and I didn't want to scare you away by being pushy, I just- -"

Charlie's eyes start to water at the sight of Bella falling apart in front of him.

"I always wanted you to live with me," Charlie swears. "The courts thought it would be better if you stayed with your mother for the majority of the year. Bella, I promise you, Renee never called me about you wanting to come live with me. That conversation never happened, not once. If I had known you wanted to come with me, if I had known you hadn't liked Arizona, I would've come for you immediately. I'm so sorry."

"I just," Bella cried, breath hitching, tears streaming down her face. "I've always had to take care of her! I've always had to make sure the bills got paid on time and make sure the house was clean, and I don't have to do any of that here and I don't know what I'm supposed to do with all this free time. I don't -"

Bella started to sob, and Charlie enveloped her in his arms. She clutched at his T-shirt like a small child, gasping for air. She didn't know how to tell him that her outburst was about more than her mother at the moment. She'd felt off balance ever since she got to Forks. It had nothing to do with her father or having moved to an entirely new state. Her dazed state was a result of not knowing how to fit into her own life anymore. Growing up, she was the adult, the caretaker, the responsible one. She did the cooking and the cleaning and the bill paying, and not, in Forks, she didn't have to do any of that. Charlie paid the bills and they took turns washing the dishes and he was capable of feeding himself without her.

She wasn't needed by him the same way she was needed by her mother, and it was unsettling. It wasn't a bad thing that Charlie was capable of taking care of himself, not at all. In fact, it was a very nice change. But it was a sudden change; after more than a decade of having to be an adult, Bella wasn't sure she knew how to be a child. She was always so tense, always so worked up, and didn't know how to let people take care of ehr. And so she threw herself into her relationship with Edward, unaware that she was subconsciously letting him treat her like she couldn't take care of herself and needed him to baby her every step of the way. Bella wondered if she tolerated that from him because she didn't have any other knowledge on how relationships worked.

Bella inhaled sharply and wiped her eyes, and Charlie let her go.

"Sorry," Bella whispered.

"It's okay," Charlie whispered back. "God, Bella, I swear I never knew."

"You didn't know because I didn't want you to. I was convinced that I had to keep everything bottled up and be the adult, I never knew that it could be any other way."

"You know things are gonna be different now, though, right?"

Bella leaned her head against his shoulder. "Yeah, I know."


	2. Two

**TWO**

* * *

Bella goes back to school on a Monday.

The sky is a pale orange, the sun not quite out but not hidden by rain clouds either. Instead of the usually frigid air that happens around this time of year, there's nothing but a cool breeze. Bella smiles. The weather, calming and smooth, makes her feel like today is the day for new beginnings.

Halloween will be coming up soon, and Bella actually looks forward to it. Not because she wants to dress up or anything, but because she loves the way the crispness of the October turned to November air makes her feel, like every lungful she takes in is healing her. Also, the part of her that occasionally indulged in childlike whimsies loved stepping on freshly fallen pinecones and leaves. She remembers how last year, despite seeing other classmates play in the leaves outside, Edward had gripped her arm tightly and held her back, believing it was too juvenile.

After damn near a year of not talking to any of her other friends in high school, Bella was determined to at least apologize to them today. Them being Jessica and Angela. Bella didn't want anything to do with Lauren or her bitchy attitude, and the less she saw of Mike the better. Jessica and Angela had been nice to her from the start, though, with no ulterior motives, and they had made an effort to include her in the conversations at the lunch table.

She'd never had many friends growing up, her only interactions with people her age being her summer visits to Forks when her father would take her to go see Jake and the other kids on the reservation. When she was with her mother, though, she didn't have the time nor the patience for children, despite being one herself. She was just always so busy making sure the mortgage was paid and the lights were on, and she didn't have time to play in the mud outside with her neighbors.

Having friends now, though, was a surreal experience, and she couldn't believe she blew it.

When she started dating Edward, she stopped seeing them. Of course, she saw them in passing in the hallway or maybe the parking lot, but when Edward was around, it was like she had tunnel vision. Her eyes only locked on Edward and she followed him around like a lost puppy, sitting with him and his family during lunch.

Bella drummed her fingers against the steering wheel as she looks around the parking lot. She had arrived fifteen minutes ago and was just watching everyone else file in. She saw a few students do a double take at the sight of her signature beaten up truck and point, whispering amongst themselves.

She almost laughed out loud at how they must think of her; _local girl who spiraled when her boyfriend leaves her suddenly shows her face in public again._

While not quite ready to confront all of the baggage she had piled up inside of her, she knew that she had to be ready for the occasional jab or two at her about Edward leaving. At the end of the day, she could go home and wallow in her room if it really got to her, but she refused to lay in bed again all day. Being stationary in her own filth had done nothing for her wellbeing.

Bella glanced at the clock on the dashboard.

School started in twenty minutes.

Usually, Bella would have arrived early to secure a good parking space near the back so that way, when school was letting out, she didn't have to fight too much to get out of the parking lot. Today, though, she'd chosen a spot right in the middle so that, when Jessica and Angela arrived, she'd be able to see them and hopefully cross paths with them before they were swept away to their different classes. Bella supposed that she could always see Jess in homeroom, but she wanted Angela to be there at the same time so she wouldn't have to repeat herself. And confronting them in the cafeteria was a big no no, because the last thing Bella needed was for Lauren to cause a scene just as she was about to redeem herself.

Jessica's Prius rolls up and parks nearby, and from the corner of her eye, Bella can see Angela get off the bus near the end of the parking lot.

Go time.

Bella took a deep breath and got out of her car, shrugging her backpack on and closing the door.

By the time Jessica is out of the car and has gotten herself situated with her books and backpack, Bella's already standing directly in front of her.

The surprise on Jessica's face turns quickly into annoyance, and Bella falters for just a second before she forces herself to get the words out.

"Hey," Bella greeted, playing with the strap of her backpack.

Jessica arches an eyebrow and gives a curt, "Hey," in response, clearly expecting the three letter word to be the end of their social interaction for the century.

Angela's just now getting halfway up the hill, and her head turns in Bella's direction. Bella motions for her to come over, but doesn't leave Jessica's side, afraid that Jess would haul ass into the school the second Bella wasn't standing in the way.

Angela hesitantly comes over, clearly as baffled as Jessica is at Bella's presence, although she was much too nice to say anything about it. Bella greets her and Angela just nods back.

"I know you guys probably hate me," Bella says. "And that's justified. Last year, I was new to the school and I didn't know anyone, and you guys were really nice to me and made sure to include me at the lunch table and invited me to go places with you guys outside of school. And I never really appreciated that." Jessica's hardened face softens just a bit. "Me being shy and introverted is no excuse, I should have put more effort into our friendship. You guys were giving a hundred and fifteen percent, and, on a good day, I was maybe giving twelve. And then I started dating Edward, and then I cut you guys out completely, and I swear, I never meant to do any of that."

Bella's throat has become thick with emotion, and she blinks rapidly to keep the tears at bay. Angela gives a watery smile, encouragement for her to continue, and Jessica doesn't look so hostile anymore, instead clamping her lips together to hide the way her bottom lip trembles.

"I got so caught up, you know? Hottest guy in school wanted someone plain and boring like me, and I just cut you guys out because I wanted him to like me. I completely changed who I was to impress some stupid teenage boy, and that _so_ violates the girl code." Jessica's giggles are followed by tears that she hastily wipes away. "I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm sorry. And, if you're open to it, I'd like to start over. Be a real friend to you guys this time, if you'll have me."

Jessica's arms lock around Bella and Angela's neck, yanking them together in one teary group hug. The three of them sob and smile as they clutch at each other, Jessica's mascara completely ruined, black streaks running down her cheeks. Angela's glasses have been knocked askew from the force of her collision with Bella and Jessica.

"New code, from here on out," Jessica declares, holding her head up high as they pull back from each other.

Her hair, which had been straightened, is now frizzy, the strands looking like they wanted to escape from her scalp; her hair against Angela and Bella's hair had created a lot of friction. The makeup that was once so carefully done was now smeared across her cheeks and around her eyes, making her look like a raccoon.

Bella thought she looked absolutely gorgeous.

"Doesn't matter who the guy is, we do _not_ let him tears us apart. He could be Edward Cullen two point oh, and he'd still be dead to us. Understand? This is a pact, bitches. The three of us are going to be friends for the rest of our lives, this is non-negotiable."

Jessica put her hand out, and Bella smacked her hand on top of hers. Angela puts her hand on the pile as well.

"I've never liked boys much anyways."

* * *

Friendship restored, Bella is sure that nothing can ruin her day.

She and Jessica had gone to their homeroom, waving goodbye to Angela as she went to hers. Bella encouraged Jessica to tell her about her life, catch her up on what she's missed. So far, she's learned that Jessica's father got a promotion, and that her mother has picked up yet another hobby.

"My parents try to put on this happy front when I'm around, but I know they're not happy together," Jessica says as they sit in the back of the classroom. The teacher has yet to call roll. "My dad's promotion is good news, but my mom keeps spending money on these hobbies that she never sees through and it's driving my dad insane. You're so lucky."

"How?" Bella asked, baffled at the turn in conversation.

"Your parents divorced years ago, and they're better off. Now you have your dad, and he seems chill. Much less of a hard ass than my own father, which is weird because I figured having the police chief as your father would be the makings of a teenage tragedy."

Bella laughs. "You know me, Jess. I don't go to parties, I don't drink, I don't do drugs. I go to school and I go home. My dad never had to be a hard ass because I don't _do_ anything."

"We've got to change that."

"You want me to do drugs?!"

"No!" Jessica rolled her eyes so hard Bella thought they would fall out of her head. "I mean, you have to live a little, start going to parties. I'm not saying you have to go buck wild and dance naked on a table, but you can't stay in the house all day. Ages sixteen to twenty nine are our prime years, baby, and we've go to live it up."

"I'll think about it," Bella said, and she actually meant it.

She wasn't much of a party person, but Jessica was right, she had to get out of the house more. While Bella very much enjoyed reading for fun of rewatching her favorite movies, she didn't want to do that everyday for the rest of her life. And that comment about this being her prime really stuck with her. She knew that people could be old but still be lively, but Bella didn't want to wait decades before she lived her best life, she wanted to live a good life now. When she was eighty, she wanted to be able to look back at her seventeen year old self and be happy that she got those life experiences.

Bella and Jessica part ways at the end of homeroom, and the next three hours that pass are filled with her teachers welcoming her back with pitying glances, and her classmates laughing at her behind her back.

Bella...wasn't as bothered as she thought she'd be. Sure, it hurt that so many of her classmates could so easily laugh at the fact that Edward ditched her and she'd fallen into a pit of despair, but she wasn't super focused on it. She had more important things to worry about, like improving her relationship with her father, confronting her mother over her disgusting lies, apologizing to the Blacks, and hunting down Sam. Not to mention waiting for her father to get back to her with the women's programs in Forks. Bella was a little worried at first about attending meetings in such a small town where she would easily be recognized, until she realized that it wasn't anyone else's business what she'd grown through with Edward. And even if the townsfolk did begin to speculate that the Cullens weren't as squeaky clean as previously believed, what did _she_ care?

They abandoned her. They treated her like she was an object. They didn't even have the decency to give her a proper goodbye. So if her neighbors began to think of the Cullens in a bad way, served them right.

Bella meets back up with Jessica and Angela in the cafeteria, and the three of them head to the lunch line. Bella grabs a slice of pizza, the grease staining her fingers as it spilled off the plate, and a can of Sprite. Jessica looked like she wanted to grab a salad, but instead went for the pizza as well. Angela had packed a lunch that day.

Once Bella and Jessica paid, they hunted for a table, not really wanting to sit with Lauren in the others that day.

"Let's sit at the Cullens table," Angela suggested, looking at Bella. "First step to getting over your crappy ex-boyfriend? Take over his territory."

And so the three monopolized the table that used to house the Cullens, eyes on them from every angle.

"I feel so powerful," Jessica laughed. cracking open her bottle of apple juice.

"I'm surprised you're not getting a salad," Bella said, wiping her hands on a napkin. "I remember you used to be obsessed with eating green."

"Mike's made it clear that he's not interested, and I refuse to adjust my eating habits to impress some boy. New pact, remember? To hell with men, I say!" She pumped her fist in the air.

"Speaking of men," Bella arched an eyebrow at Angela. "What happened between you and yours?"

Angela flushed, picking at the crust of her chicken salad sandwich.

"Ben and I didn't work out," she mumbled. "I guess my height is more intimidating than I thought."

"Okay, no," Bella snaps. "If he's insecure about your height then that's his personal problem he needs to work out on his own time. You're gorgeous, and if he can't handle that, forget him."

"All in favor of tossing Ben to the curb say 'I'", Jess says, and Angela laughs as Bella and Jess prod her into loudly proclaiming "I!" with them.

"We should have some girl time," Angela says. "It's been a while."

"What about a sleepover?" Bella hesitantly suggest. "I've never been to one and I don't really know how they work, but it could be fun."

"Woah, what do you mean you've never been to a sleepover?" Jessica demanded. "That's, like, a right of passage for a teenage girl."

Bella shrugged. "I never had the chance. My mom would probably fall apart without me if I stayed somewhere else for the weekend, and I just got to Forks last year, so I haven't exactly had many prospects lined up."

"Unacceptable," Jessica told her, and Angela nodded solemnly in agreement. "Next week, we get that Friday off because of teacher conferences. I say that Thursday night, we all go to my house and get you properly inducted into teenage girlhood. We'll get pizza, popcorn, scary movies, and I'll teach you how to put on mascara even if it kills me."

Angela grins, her foot knocking into Bella's. "Come on, Bells. It'll be fun!"

"Yeah," Bella said slowly, a grin spreading across her face. "What the hell, I'm in!"

Jessica and Angela cheer and hunch forward, drawing Bella into their plans.

* * *

Charlie clears the dinner table, rinsing off the plates and putting them in the dishwasher. It didn't get much use, as he and Bella preferred to hand wash dishes usually, but tonight he figure they could both use a break.

Bella had made grilled chicken for dinner, with a healthy side of broccoli and brown rice. When Charlie had poked at the greens, Bella had arched an unimpressed eyebrow at him. Much to his embarrassment, Bella had sat at the table with him until he'd cleared his plate of vegetables.

"You didn't have to give me that much broccoli," Charlie grumbled to Bella, who had just finished sweeping the floor.

Bella grinned, putting the broom and dustpan back in the corner. "It's good for you, Dad. You can't eat fried fish all the time, it's bad for your heart."

Charlie huffed, but knew she was right. He really needed to cut back on the greasy foods.

"Besides," Bella continued. "You won't be on this health kick alone. From now on, you and I are going to eat our weight in fruits and vegetables. Foods with low starch, low sugars, and drinking lots of water. Maybe we can even, I don't know, go for a walk a few times a week."

Bella said the last part quietly, as if afraid of rejection. Charlie shut the dishwasher and started it up before turning to face her.

"As long as we're in this together," Charlie said, and Bella smiled.

"I want to run something else by you too," Bella twisted her fingers together nervously.

"You aren't in any trouble at school, are you?" Charlie frowned, leaning back against the counter.

"No!" Bella assured him. "It's just...Jessica is having a sleepover next Thursday, she invited Angela and I, and I wanted to know if it was okay for me to go?"

If Charlie hadn't been aware of how damaging life with Renee was for Bella, he probably would've guffawed at the fact that Bella thought she had to be afraid to ask to go to a friend's house. After the small talk he'd had with his daughter, he understood that she didn't get the chance to be a child when she was with Renee, and that as a result, her social skills weren't really up to par, and she didn't know what was expected of her. Charlie thought it would be good for Bella to go to sleepovers and hang out with people her own age. Of course, Charlie loved spending time with her, but it wasn't good for a teenager to spend all their time surrounded by people twice their age.

"Of course," Charlie smiled, not missing the way Bella's shoulders slumped in relief.

Bella grinned back, a little more sure of herself.

"Okay, cool. Thank you," she mumbled bashfully. "You're gonna be okay with me gone for an entire weekend? School's cancelled that Friday, so I'd be gone from Thursday to Sunday?"

Charlie ruffled his daughter's hair, and she squawked in protest. "Relax, Bells. I'll be fine. You go on up to bed, I'll finish up in here."

Bella hugged and kissed her father goodnight before going upstairs, a huge smile on her face. She was going to her first sleepover next week! The movies she'd seen made them all seem like so much fun; horror movies, a pile of candy and chips, and an endless torrent of gossip. Bella was new to it all, but she was ready to embrace it.

She fell asleep that night buried under the covers, content with the way her life was going.


	3. Three

**THREE**

* * *

They take the cruiser to La Push on Saturday.

Charlie drives more carefully than usual, taking his sweet time getting to Billy's house. Bella glances at him from the passenger seat, the afternoon glow of the sun bringing out the slightest bit of auburn in her hair. Normally, she'd worry about him in silence, but they're trying this new communication thing, and she wants to do better. She wants their relationship to be better.

"I bet he's not even mad anymore, Dad," Bella assures him.

Billy and her dad had been friends for what seemed like forever; they'd been best friends since before she was even born! They seemed inseparable, and perhaps they had been until the Cullens had rolled into town. Her dad had supported Carlisle's presence at the hospital, and not without justifiable reason; Carlisle was doing amazing medical work, and, Charlie had noted, was doing said work for half of what he'd get if he'd gone to a bigger city to work. Billy hadn't felt the same. According to her father, Billy and many other residents of La Push stopped going to the hospital the second Carlisle showed up. Billy had been vague about the entire thing, but he'd made it very clear that he'd rather die than go anywhere near the Cullens. Despite Billy never giving a reason for hating the Cullens, Charlie was adamant that he should've taken his friend's concerns seriously instead of brushing them off.

Billy had reported feeling uneasy around the Cullens and not wanting Charlie to let Bella associate with Edward, and Charlie had taken offense to that at first. Now, though, he'd seen first hand how the Cullens operate, such as leaving his daughter in the woods in the middle of the night where anything could have happened to her. However, even with that realization, Charlie didn't know how to apologize to Billy for not believing him.

"Billy can hold a grudge," Charlie grumbled, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. Bella absently registered that she did the same thing when she was nervous. "Both of us said some things...I don't know. I don't know if he'll even want to see me."

"The least you can do is try," Bella said. "Besides, it's not just you he's going to have words for. He told me to stay away from the Cullens, too, remember? We both blew him off. As far as I'm concerned, we're both on his shit list. Which is exactly why I spent the morning slaving away in the kitchen."

Bella glances behind her to look in the backseat, making sure the pans of food hadn't toppled over. She'd spent the morning making lasagna, garlic bread, salad, and chocolate chip cookies. She figured that Billy would feel more inclined to hear her and her father out if they had gifts to accompany their apologies. And Jacob was a bottomless pit; the second the dessert came out, Bella would probably have her best friend back.

"I feel like it's worse in my case, though," Charlie groused, steering neatly around a pothole.

Bella hadn't been in La Push since the beach trip she took when she first arrived in Forks, and before that, it had been years since her last visit to this side of town. There were many people she didn't recognize, but a few people around her age that she vaguely remembered. Maybe she'd played with them when they were kids.

"I've known Billy for decades," Charlie continues quietly. "He wouldn't have had a reason to lie. You've only known the Cullens for a year, and you had just moved to Forks. You needed something new and shiny to keep you from dying of boredom."

They shared a smile.

"You said it yourself, Dad. You've been friends for decades. Neither of you should let this little spat be the end of that friendship. Today's the day to get everything out in the open. You both have to open up."

"I hate it when you're right."

Charlie parks the car outside Billy's house. It's the very last house on the street, far away from the others and right on the edge of the expansive woods. Bella smiles as she gets out of the car, recalling how much trouble she and Jacob would get into for making mud pies and tracking their mess into the house. And there, at the picnic table on the end of the woods, Bella spent time with Rachel and Rebecca, letting them play with her hair and nails. Looking back on it, Rachel and Rebecca never suffocated her with fashion like Alice did.

Shaking her head, Bella grabbed the food from the back seat, Charlie helping her.

Walking up to the front door, Bella takes a deep breath before knocking. Her hearts pounds furiously in her chest.

The door creaks open, and Billy stares up at them, utterly unimpressed.

Bella figures she and her father look downright pitiful; both of them clutching trays of food, faces forlorn, yet hopeful. Just when Bella thinks Billy's going to slam the door in their faces, he wheels himself backwards to allow them inside. Charlie exhales heavily behind her.

"You two got some nerve," Billy grumbles, wheeling himself over to the kitchen table. Angry, but not too angry to turn down a free meal. Bella gently sets the food down on the table, Charlie following her lead. She glances at her father, and he steps forward.

Bella smiles as Billy's hardened face softens just a little bit, and she excuses herself, giving them some privacy.

She'd been sitting on the porch for maybe ten minutes when Jacob shows up, two other boys flanking him. One of the boys points at her, shaking Jake's shoulder roughly, and Jacob's head swivels in her direction. Bella raises a hand sheepishly.

Jacob says something to his friends and they leer and jostle him a bit before walking off.

Bella stands, stuffing her hands in the pockets of her jacket so he couldn't see her fidget. Jacob's long legs have him standing in front of her in seconds, and she gapes up at him. She was pretty sure he wasn't this tall the last time she saw him, which was at the dance last year.

His vertical growth spurt wasn't the only thing different about him. Jake's face was starting to rapidly lose its baby fat, showing a rather chiseled jaw underneath. His hair seemed thicker and longer, too, reaching way past his shoulders. His arms, _good lord,_ his arms; Jacob looked like he bench pressed motorcycles in his free time.

Jake cleared his throat, and Bella flushed, jerking her eyes back up to focus on his face. He smirked.

"First time seeing me in months, and you only want me for my body."

"In your dreams," Bella grinned. "I'm just baffled that you grew so much. I distinctly remember a time where I was taller than you."

"That was never a thing, shrimpy. You've always been vertically challenged, and it's okay, it isn't your fault. Some of us just have superior genes."

It felt just like old times. Bella missed him, and hadn't even realized how much she missed him until just then.

"I'm sorry," Bella said, and the smile drops from Jacob's face. "I haven't been a very good friend to you lately, have I? I've been so caught up in myself and my stupid problems, and you've been there for me, and I don't think I've ever even asked you how your day was. How was your day, Jacob?"

Jacob shrugs, the smile returning to his lips. "I hung out with Quil and Embry today. Embry and I kicked Quil's ass on his playstation. Embry's mom made cake, too, and I shamelessly consumed two huge slices." He pauses, and says slowly, "What about you? How have you been since..."

"Since Edward Cullen left me in the woods?" Bella supplied cheerfully.

Jacob flushed.

"I've actually been pretty good," Bella admitted. "I mean, I'm not okay, but it's okay to not be okay, you know?"

Jacob opens his mouth to respond, but the front door of his house creaks open, and Bella and Jacob both turn to see a red eyed Charlie standing in the doorway. At first, Bella fears that her father had just lost his best friend. But the smile he gives them assures her that Charlie and Billy are back to being thick as thieves.

Charlie tells them to come inside so they can get ready for dinner. Jacob goes in first, nearly bowling Charlie over at the mention of food. Bella lingers in the doorway with her father, raising her eyebrows at him. He nods, and Bella feels like a weight is lifted off her shoulders. Her dad throws an arm around her shoulders and leads her to the kitchen.

The food had gotten a bit cold, so Bella slips it into the oven to warm up while Jacob and Charlie set the table. It's refreshing to see her dad and Billy bickering just like they used to. Bella looks at her father's face, which is practically glowing with his joy. Billy's face mirrors her fathers, and Bella hates herself just a bit for dating Edward Cullen, for making her dad feel like he had to pick sides. The self hatred lasts for all of fifteen minutes before Bella stomps the thought away.

It isn't her fault that Edward turned out to be a shitbag, and it also isn't her fault that the Cullens happen to be vampires. She couldn't keep shouldering the blame for things that had nothing to do with her, it was unhealthy and she refused to go back to the smelly zombie she had been just a few days ago.

Once the food was reheated, Bella, Charlie, Billy, and Jacob squeezed around the table to eat together.

Bella smiles as Jacob piled more salad on his father's plate, taking away the extra piece of garlic bread the older man had grabbed for himself. Billy opened his mouth to protest, and was swiftly silence by Jacob's arched eyebrow. Pouting just a bit, Billy poured the ranch dressing over the lettuce and dug in, grumbling half heartedly under his breath.

Charlie looked at Bella from across the table and smiled.

Things were looking up.

* * *

After dinner, Bella and Jake left their fathers to watch the game on TV while they went for a walk. Bella knew she needed to speak to Billy alone and planned to do so after the game, wanting to let her father have some time with his oldest friend. Jacob led her down to the beach, their shoes sinking into the sand with every step. Bella made a mental note to shake her shoes out before the weekend was over.

"So, any La Push drama I need be caught up on before I inevitably make a fool of myself?"

Jacob laughed, swinging an arm around her shoulders and knocking them together. If not for him holding her up, she would've collapsed face first into the sand. He led her to a fallen tree a few yard up from the shoreline, and they perched themselves upon it, Bella swinging herself up so that she could rest her entire body on the trunk.

"Well," Jacob deliberated. "The biggest scandal on the block right now is the one between Sam, Leah, and Emily. Damn near everyone in La Push is taking sides, and it's making an even bigger mess."

"Leah?" Bella frowned, the name familiar. "Leah Clearwater?"

Bella hadn't seen Leah since they were children. Their last interaction had been before Jacob's mom had passed. Around that time, too, Bella had started coming to Forks less and less per her mother's persuasion.

"Yeah," Jacob sighed, one leg bent other him, the other swinging above the sand, the tip of his toes occasionally bringing up a small cloud of sand. "Leah and Sam were engaged. They were supposed to get married once Leah got done with high school, and Leah was planning on staying in-state for college so they'd be close. Everything was going great...until Sam disappeared for a couple of months."

" _Months?_ Where the hell was he?!"

Jacob shrugged. "He's been pretty tight lipped around it. Apparently only Old Quil, my dad, and Harry and Sue Clearwater know, but they won't talk. Anyways, Sam disappeared for months, and not once did he call or write to Leah. She didn't even know if he was alive or not. Then, all of a sudden, he turns back up in la Push, and, boy, has he changed! Sam was maybe five foot ten when he disappeared. When he comes back, guess how tall he is?"

Bella shrugged.

"Six foot four," Jacob says, leaning forward. "It may not seem like a big deal, but no one in Sam's family has ever been that tall. And, Bells, Sam came back _jacked_. Dude could hold his own in a fight before, but now he looks like he could pick a person up and skip them like a stone on a river."

"Jesus," Bella murmured, shivering as a cool breeze washed over her, blowing her and Jacob's hair all around her heads, and in sync they raise a hand to push the strands back. "So, what happened with them and Leah?"

"Sam comes back to La Push, and no one except my dad and the others knew that he was back for several days. They kept it real quiet. Leah finds out that he's been back and she goes _off,_ rightfully so in my opinion. They fight, and Leah forgives him, and - "

"You don't sound too happy about that." Bella smirked as Jacob blushed. "You soft on her or something?"

"Let me finish the story!" Jacob snapped instead of answering the question. Bella raised her hands in surrender. "Leah forgives him, and it seems like maybe they're back on track to being married. Well, that lasts for about a week. Leah comes home from work one day, and what does she find? Sam fucking Emily in Leah's bed."

"Okay, so, having sex with another girl in his fiancé's bed? Cold blooded by itself. But who is Emily to Leah? Why is she so important?"

"Emily is Leah's cousin and best friend."

Bella chokes.

"Yeah, exactly!" Jacob looked absolutely disgusted by the entire situation. "Leah and Sam fight again, this time with Emily in the mix trying to make excuses for herself. Sam starts spouting all this bullshit about how he had never wanted to hurt Leah, but he didn't want to marry her anymore because he wanted to be with Emily. Now, here's the real kicker. Leah's parents, Harry and Sue, knew that Sam was interested in Emily since the day he got back from wherever the hell he disappeared too. When Leah found out about that, on top of walking in on Sam and Emily, she was practically foaming at the mouth. Damn near ripped Emily's eyes out.

"The entire thing was months ago. But the reason it's still going strong is because people have been picking sides, and Sam's side seems to be very popular."

"That's bullshit," Bella snarled, incredibly defensive over a childhood friend that she hadn't interacted with in a decade. Maybe it was because she, herself, had been so recently screwed over by a man and knew what it felt like to be so utterly disrespected, but her veins pumped viciously with red hot anger at the thought of Emily living large despite being a home wrecker. "Sam's a piece of shit and anyone who supports him is trash by association."

"That's what I said!" Jacob exclaimed, shooting up from his seat on the tree and pounding his fist into his palm. "If Sam didn't want to be with Leah, all he had to do, literally all he had to do, was just _say so_. Instead, he strings her along and fucks her cousin. And he doesn't just fuck her cousin, no, he fucks her in Leah's bed! And now he's walking around here, him and Emily both, demanding Leah's forgiveness as if they haven't publicly humiliated her, as if they haven't betrayed her, as if they did nothing wrong!"

"I can't believe her own parents aren't on her side," Bella said with a scowl. "They're her parents! It's their job to be on her side in situations like this! Charlie would've rammed Edward off the road if he did something like that to me."

Jacob scowled as well, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Well, apart from his little disappearing act, I guess people feel bad for Sam because he's been doing his best to clean up the Uley name is entire life. His dad was a deadbeat, see, a drunk and abusive to Sam and his mom, so he's bee doing a lot of volunteer work. Helping old ladies, doing good in school, helping the younger kids out, that kind of thing. I heard he even ran a drug dealer out of town. I guess they figured he's earned one fuck up for all his hard work."

Jacob's snide tone and scrunched up face tells Bella exactly where Jake thought Sam could shove all his hard wor.

"Something else is bothering you," Bella guessed, standing too. "What's up, Jake?"

He's silent for a few minutes, and Bella waits patiently for him to gather his thoughts. Finally, he sits back down and Bella follows.

"Sam's been...looking at me weird."

"W-What?" Bella stammered. "Weird how?"

"He," the noise that emits from Jacob's chest can only be described as a growl. "He keeps looking at me as if he's waiting for something! And it's not just him, it's his creepy ass friends, Paul and Jared, too. They just stand and watch me. The other day, when we were looking for you, after Sam gave you to Charlie, he just stood there staring at me expectantly. I've told me dad about it, and what did he have to say? Nothing helpful, just told me to ignore it.

"Hey," Bella whispered, frowning at the violent way Jacob's arms and shoulders shake, as if he's vibrating. "Hey, listen to me. Are you listening?" Jacob's head jerks up and down in a nod. "I know I haven't been a very good friend lately, but all that changes today. I was planning on bringing brownies to Sam on Sunday to thank him for finding me in the woods, but if you want me to, I can poison them.

Jacob's shaking comes from laughter now.

"You'd really poison them?"

"Of course! Bella Swan is a bringer of justice."

"My hero!"

Bella knocks her shoulder against his.

"I'm serious, Jake. If Sam's making you uncomfortable..."

"I'll deal with it," Jake sighs, kicking his right leg back and forth. "Somehow."

* * *

"Gotta admit, I was real surprised to see you and your dad on this side of town," Billy says as Bella finishes washing the last of the dishes and packing up the remaining food in Tupperware for Billy and Jake to eat later.

"Yeah, well, we had some ass kissing to do," Bella smiled. "He did his part already, and now it's time for me to do mine."

After placing the last container in the fridge, Bella turns to face Billy head on.

"And what would you be apologizing for?" Billy says, as if he already doesn't know what mess she got herself into.

"For not listening to you when you tried to warn me. You were right, Billy, when you said they were dangerous. That they'd hurt me. And, yeah, maybe they didn't personally hurt me physically, but emotional scars are scars all the same. You gave me a heads up, went out of your way to do so, and I still didn't take you seriously. And for that, I apologize."

"Hm," Billy sniffed. "I suppose you've learned your lesson now?"

"Big time." Bella laughed, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'd like to limit my time spent with the - "

Bella and Billy both turn their heads to look out the window where Charlie and Jacob were outside talking, wanting them to be out of earshot for what she was about to say next.

"The supernatural," Bella finished.

"Good. I'm glad you've seen the error of your ways. I trust we won't have a repeat incident?"

"No repeat incidents," Bella swore. "Scouts honor."

Soon after, Bella and Charlie are on their way home, Jacob and Billy disappearing from sight as they drive down the road. They're both exhausted, ready to crash into their beds and get ready for the next day.

As they cross the border separating La Push from Forks, Bella reaches over and grabs her father's free hand and squeezes. He smiles down at her.

They were going to be okay.


	4. Four

**FOUR**

* * *

Charlie pressed his lips together tightly to prevent himself from laughing at Bella as she eyed the box of worms warily. He and Bella had made plans to go fishing that weekend, and he was surprised that she actually meant it. When she was little, Bella didn't like fishing, and would instead stay with Jacob and the other kids on the reservation whenever he, Billy, and Harry went out on the lake. It felt strange having her here, no longer a small child but now a young woman. Strange in a good way; he felt like maybe it wasn't too late to create good memories with her.

"Come on, Bells," Charlie laughed.

Bella shook her head vehemently. "I'm not touching that. It's so slimy! Why can't you put it on?"

"How are you going to learn how to do it if I do it for you?"

"I won't need to know how to do it because I'll always have you to do it for me," Bella grumbled, and Charlie grinned.

Bella held out shaking hands, Charlie's voice guiding her.

"Don't hold your fingers so close to the hook, there you go. Now, grab a worm from the box." Bella shot him a dark look, but did as he said, spine shivering as the worm wriggled in her grasp. She looked like she wanted to throw the worm and the entire box into the river and go back to the pier. "Now, use the hook to put a hole in one end of the worm."

It took her a few tries, as she kept dropping the worm when it would coil around her fingers, but eventually she got it.

"Ugh," Bella groused.

"Practice makes perfect," Charlie said cheerfully, helping Bella straighten her fishing line and cast it out, and then doing his own.

The sun beamed down on them, and Charlie was glad that Bella made them put on several layers of sunscreen, as well as wear hats to protect their faces from the sun.

Out there on the water with Bella, watching the way she seemed to relax on the water, her body gently rocking back and forth with the current, Charlie wondered how often Bella got to just relax when she was with Renee. They hadn't had a chance to talk more about Renee's parenting skills or lack thereof, and Charlie desperately wanted to confront it. While normally he'd avoid all talks of Renee so he could ignore the feeling of sadness in his gut at how abruptly she left him, it wasn't about him now, at least not directly. It was about Bella being denied a childhood and having to be an adult since the day she was old enough to walk.

"Hey," Charlie said, glancing over at her. Bella looked up from where she'd been watching the lake ripple. "Will you tell me more? About -"

"About life with Renee?" Bella guessed, stomach twisting. Despite all her talk of wanting to be more open with her father, she was stil hesitant to delve deeper into her time with Renee down in Arizona. Her parents hadn't parted on the best of terms, and Bella worried that if Charlie found out just how chaotic Bella's childhood had been due to Renee's inability to be an adult, he'd fly to Florida to give her mother a piece of his mind. But at the same time, she couldn't keep burying everything down.

Charlie nodded, and he looked as scared as she felt.

"I don't know where to start," Bella chuckled. "I guess from the beginning, when I was tall enough to see over the stove. She may have been my mother biologically but a lot of the time it felt like I was the mom and she was the child. I had to take care of her, you know. I had to make sure the bills got paid, apply to jobs for her whenever she decided to quit her current one on a whim, which was ridiculously often. I had to cook, clean, do everything. Mom was just...I guess she wanted to be carefree, to never have to worry about anything, but I don't think she realized that she couldn't do that with a child."

Charlie tensed, but said nothing. He would never let Bella know, well, maybe not never but at least not right now, that he'd been reading parenting books lately. He wanted to improve his relationship with his daughter, wanted her to feel comfortable and safe with him. Something he could clearly recall reading was that, when the child is opening up about a sensitive topic, it's best not to give unsolicited advice, or else they'd clam up. And so, Charlie wanted quietly for Bella to gather her thoughts before she spoke again.

"She didn't hit me. I didn't know if you were wondering, but just in case you were, I wanted you to know that she never hit me. But just because she didn't hit me doesn't mean she didn't hurt me in other ways. She was never there for me, physically, or emotionally. It was always about her problems. About how awful her job was because they wouldn't let her take another three week vacation so soon after her last one. About her boyfriend who she'd break up with in a week or two anyways. There was always a spotlight on her life, and for a long time I never questioned it.

"I started to resent her around the seventh grade," Bella admits, surprised at how great it felt to get that off her chest. Instantly her body feels ten pounds lighter. "I felt guilty for resenting her, you know? She drove me insane but I felt bad for feeling that way because I thought that I needed to be grateful to her. I remember being so angry, all the time, although I hid it well. I couldn't go to birthday parties, sleepovers, not even to a friend's house for a couple of hours after school. She'd whine about how I was abandoning her, about how much she needed me. I kept turning invitations down and eventually...people stopped inviting me."

Bella remembers with a startlingly amount of clarity on that one specific day in the seventh grade, where Hayley was inviting people to her bowling party which would turn into a sleepover after. Bella remembers wriggling in her seat, excited to receive an invitation, because she was so sure that she'd be able to go this time. Her mother had just gotten a new boyfriend, which meant that she was on a high, and that, for a couple of weeks, she'd have her new man to take care of her instead of her daughter. Imagine her surprise when Hayley's eyes skipped right over Bella, and the blonde girl had walked right past her seat, handing an invitation to the girl behind Bella.

She'd been devastated.

So distraught, Bella had snuck out of the school during lunch and had walked home, the sun beaming down on her head the entire way. When the school had called to report her absence, her mother hadn't even noticed.

"I'm sorry, Bells." Charlie murmured, reaching over to squeeze her hand. He paused before gaining the confidence to ask his question, "Did...did Renee have a lot of boyfriends when you were growing up?"

At Bella's arched eyebrow, Charlie made sure to clarify, "I'm not jealous, I swear. I'm just concerned at the type of environment that would create for a child. I know that I wasn't there as often as I would have liked to be, and so I would hope that with Renee you would have had some stable, positive male figure in your life."

Bella laughed, "Oh, if only."

Charlie tensed.

"Mom's boyfriends were always super creepy. They'd leer at me or always try to sit next to me on the couch. I made sure to stay in my room with the door locked as much as I could." Bella chuckled. "I kept a pair of scissors under my pillow, too, just in case."

Charlie wondered how quickly he could get to the airport to catch the next flight to Florida to kick down Renee's front door. He wasn't a violent man by nature, but hearing that his daughter had felt unsafe in her own home, hearing that she might have been sexually abused for years while Renee was too airheaded to notice? Made his blood boil.

"Luckily, none of them ever tried to touch me," Bella shrugged. "I learned to deal with it. I remember being so relieved when she met Phil. He was actually a decent guy, not just there for a quick lay. He actually cared about mom, and he took care of her. Honestly, mom's desire to travel and Phil's job requiring him to travel worked out so well for me, because it gave me an excuse to come here. They're still in their honeymoon phase so they _really_ didn't want me around.

"Anyways, that's why it was so hard for me to adjust when I got here. I'd gotten so used to having to run an entire household by myself that it never occurred to me that you wouldn't need me to baby you. It took some getting used to, but it's a very nice change. Honestly, I hate paying bills. I don't know how you do it. Every month? That's wild."

Charlie laughed, forcing his fingers to relax from their clenched position around his fishing rod. "As long as you're under my roof, I'll be the one babying you. Get ready to for me to catch up on 17 years worth of embarassment that I missed out on."

"Oh, God," Bella grinned. "Nothing too humiliating, please? I already get enough from everyone about my zombie state after Edward left." She said it so casually that Charlie was stunned, but before he could address it, she's moving on. "Speaking of dating lives, how come you never remarried?"

Charlie flushed. "Let's focus on the river."

"No, no, no," Bella said. "Don't try to get out of this. We can talk and watch the river. It's this great new thing called multitasking."

"My love life is none of your business."

"Except it is," Bella nudged him with her shoulder. "Come on, Dad. Throw me a bone. We're getting to know each other better, right?"

Charlie sighed. Scrubbed a hand down his face.

"I know a lot of people don't think so, but I got over your mom. Does it still hurt a little that she left the way she did? Of course. I mean, she left in the middle of the night while I was sleep. All she left me was a crappy note with a bullshit apology. She said she felt trapped in this small town, and that she didn't understand why I didn't want to move yet."

"Why didn't you want to move?"

"You were just a baby at the time so you wouldn't remember, but my parents were very sick. My dad had severe arthritis, and my mom was in the early stages of Alzheimer's. It was bad, Bells. Dad couldn't move very well, and mom was getting worse every week. They needed me there to take care of them. Renee wanted me to put them in a nursing home, and I think that's the only time I ever yelled at her. I heard what happens in nursing homes, how the people there get abused and neglected. I didn't want that to happen to my parents, I wanted to be there for as long as I could before they passed, and she didn't understand that.

"I don't want you to think that the entire thing was her fault," Charlie emphasized. "She had depression, and it only got worse after she gave birth. And don't make that face, it wasn't your fault, either. Postpartum depression hit her hard, and she wanted to leave Forks. She wanted to go somewhere sunnier. I understood why she wanted to go, but I couldn't make the choice that she wanted me to. She was convinced that I didn't love her as much as I said I did, and that accusation hurt. My parents were dying, Bells."

"Hey," Bella murmured. "I'm not angry at you for choosing to stay in Forks with grandma and grandpa. You don't have to explain yourself to me."

Charlie stared hard at the water. "I cried when she left, you know? I couldn't believe it. And she had taken you! I woke up, and you were both gone. I didn't hear from her for weeks, I thought you two were dead in a ditch somewhere. I was so angry with her. Leaving me was her right, I wasn't going to hold her hostage, but she could have been considerate enough to call me at least one during those weeks to let me know that you were okay. When she finally did call, I didn't even know how to deal with it. She moved to Arizona, back with her parents, and she said that I'd be allowed to visit. I couldn't even fight for custody because all my money was in the house that I had bought us, and into caring for my parents.

"A few months after she left, my parents died. Since then I just focused my time on visiting you, seeing Billy, Harry, and Quil, and moving up in my career. I never made time for dating because I was afraid."

"Afraid of what?" Bella asks. "You're a good guy, not too bad looking -" Charlie glared, and she smiled up at him, " - and you're sweet. I don't think you need to be afraid of rejection."

"I'm afraid that I was boring," Charlie admitted. "Renee had been obsessed with spontaneity and was always on the go, and I'm a stationary kind of guy. Living in a small town makes a guy build routines that I rarely deviate from. Going to parties, going to the clubs, that lifestyle just wasn't for me. Not to mention that I'm a man with a nearly adult daughter."

"Hey," Bella said firmly. "You gotta get back out there! I'm not saying you have to do anything extreme like start clubbing or anything, but at least go out on some introductory dates! You think you don't have people lining up to spend one on one time with you, and, buddy, you are _wrong_. Do you know how many women have waxed poetic about you to my face? I'm scarred, Dad. Scarred for _life_. They'd be all over you like white on rice if given half the chance."

"Oh, God," Charlie flushed bright red. "Let's not talk about this anymore."

"I know you have to like _someone_ ," Bella said. "Look, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. All I'm saying is, if there's someone who you've had your eye on, who you want to get to know a little better, give it a shot. Okay?"

Bella waited until her father turned to look at her, a small smile blossoming on his face.

"Okay," he agreed.

Bella's fishing rod was nearly snatched out of her hand, her fingers clamping down on it to keep it from flying off into the water.

"I think I got one!"

* * *

Bella spent the rest of Saturday thinking about Jacob's situation with Sam. The entire thing was just confusing, and Bella wasn't sure if it was because she was an outsider to the community itself, if there was missing information, or both. She couldn't, for the life of her, figure out how Sam had so much sway in the La Push community to the point where Jacob's own father was brushing aside his concerns. It seemed like Sam held quite a bit of power on the reservation, which was strange, because Bella figured that, if the community was going to start holding anyone's word as law, it would be Jacob. She may not know a lot about the history of La Push, but she knew that Jacob was a direct descendant of Ephriam Black, who was the leader of the tribe way back when.

She was worried about her friend. He'd grown increasingly distressed in just the twenty four hours since she'd last seen him. He'd sent her a string of text messages ranting about being followed by Sam and his crew, about them staring holes into his back. And it wasn't just Jacob who Sam was harassing. Jacob reported that Sam was watching Quil, too. The only consolation, however slight, was that Sam didn't give two fucks about Embry.

Bella didn't want to go running to her Dad with the information yet. It wasn't that she didn't trust him, but it was the fact that Jacob's own father wasn't taking the matter seriously. She didn't want to to screw up her dad and Billy's relationship yet again, at least not without figuring out why Billy wasn't concerned about Sam. Bella knew it wasn't her place to question Billy's parenting skills, and yet...

It was hard to even put a label on what Sam and his friends were. She didn't want to call it a cult. She just didn't understand how Sam and his friends would disappear for weeks, even months, and then come back looking like every Dwayne Johnson on steroids. Bella wanted concrete proof that Sam was up to something, and when she had that proof, she'd go to her dad, since clearly Billy wasn't going to do anything.

Which was why, when Bella and Charlie came back from fishing early afternoon, she took a shower and then immediately baked a huge tray of brownies.

"You heading out?" Charlie looked up from rinsing out his cup as Bella slipped on her shoes and jacket.

"Yeah, I'm gonna give these brownies to Sam and his friends as a thank you for finding me in the woods, and then I might swing by Jake's for a bit. Is that okay?"

Asking for permission to go somewhere was such a wild concept. With her mother, Bella didn't really have to ask to go anywhere; if she needed to go to the bank to pay the bills or to the grocery store, she just _went_. Now, it was a different story. Her dad allowed her a tremendous amount of freedom, but he still had rules that he was more strict about ever since the Edward situation. She was actually grateful for the structure.

"Make sure you bring your homework with you. You and Jake can study together."

Bella holds up her backpack to show that she was thinking the exact same thing. She was glad that her relationship with her father had improved to the point where he felt comfortable making sure she got her school work done. It was a nice feeling to know that an adult in her life was watching over her instead of the other way around.

"Have fun," Charlie says. "Don't stay out too late. And tell Billy I said hi."

"Will do," Bella calls over her shoulder, tray of brownies carefully balanced in her arms as she shoulders her way out the door to her truck.

The drive to La Push gives her time to think about what she's going to say to Sam. She didn't know him well enough to demand why he was harassing Jacob, not that she'd ever have the guts to do something like that anyways. Besides, she doubts Sam would listen to her if she told him to leave Jacob alone. She didn't have to know him personally to know that Sam seemed like the type of guy who expected things to go his way, and wouldn't be happy with Bella for challenging that. Hell, she'd already learned that from hearing about what happened with Leah and Emily.

Bella drummed her fingers against the steering wheel, the open window allowing the breeze to whip her hair around her cheeks.

She'd gotten the directions to Sam's house from Billy's over dinner the other night, and found it easily. It was tucked behind a wall of trees, the little dirty road veering sharply to the right. Bella was sure that her truck easily alerted Sam to her presence. She parks and hops out, leaving her school things in the car and grabbing the brownies.

Her foot hasn't even settled on the top stair before the door swings open, a tall, buff, angry man standing in the threshold.

"The hell are _you_ doing here, paleface?" the man snarls, and Bella is so stunned that she can do nothing but gape at him, her knuckles white around the tray.

 _"Paul,"_ came a sharp reprimand from further inside the house, the voice so deep and authoritative that even Bella felt slightly scolded. 'Paul' huffs angrily and steps to the side, allowing a man to step into her line of sight. Bella realizes that this is Sam. The room behind him is what Bella assumes is the dining room and kitchen, with a third man sitting at the round table, stuffing his face with muffins. He was shirtless, barefoot, and in a pair of raggedy cut denim shorts.

Actually, they all were. Her eyes flicked down to the hard planes of Sam's chest before flicking back up to hit face. Sam's arched eyebrow lets her know that she wasn't subtle at all. He waved her inside, and she pushed that train of thought away. Bella didn't have time to ponder their matching outfits, or why they all had the exact same tattoo on the exact same arm in the exact same place. Being in Sam's house, surrounded by their matching outfits and tattoos, she was beginning to think that Jacob was right about this being a cult.

Bella realizes she's been standing awkwardly in the middle of Sam's dining room slash kitchen for at least three minutes, and she hurriedly clears her throat, ignoring the way Paul stands behind Sam, clearly annoyed by her existence.

"I, uh, just wanted to say thanks for taking the time out of your day to come look for me in the woods that night I went missing. I really appreciate you helping out my dad, so I made enough brownies for you and your friends."

Bella holds out the tray towards Sam, intending to let him grab it and then make a quick exit, craving the safety of her truck. However, the universe has other plans. The second she holds the tray out, Paul's previous bout of rage comes to an abrupt halt, and she's just barely able to get the words out before he's shoving Sam aside and snatching the tray of brownies out of her hand.

"Sorry about them," Sam grumbles as Paul hustles over to the table where he and the other man eagerly dig in, sending them both an unimpressed look. "And no problem."

Sam eyes her more closely now, and asks, "What happened in the woods, anyways?"

The tone of his voice makes Bella feel like his question was more of an interrogative demand. She bristles a bit at it, but it unwilling to call him out on it; there was no doubt in her mind that Paul would jump at the chance to rip her throat out. And, normally, she wouldn't feel too inclined to share the information of her breakup with a man she barely knew. Also, Jake didn't like him, and she was all for friend solidarity. However, Sam had gone out of his way to look for her, and she at least owes him a minor explanation.

"The Cullens," Bella says, the mention of the name making Paul and Jared tense. "I don't know them?"

"We know of them," the mystery man growls.

"Right," Bella said slowly. "Anyways, I was dating Dr. Cullen's son, Edward. He said he wanted to go for a walk, so we did, and when we got into the woods, he broke up with me and left me there. I tried to find my way back but I got lost."

"What did he say?" Sam questioned.

"Say?" Bella frowned.

"Why did they leave?"

After a few days to step back from the situation and look at it from outside her own relationship with Edward, a lot of the reasons that he gave were, admittedly, reasonable; for example, Carlisle would never be able to pass for anything older than thirty, and even that was a miracle.

"Dr. Cullen got a better job offer somewhere else, and Edward wasn't one for long distance relationships."

"Did they say anything about coming back?"

Bella shrugged. "Edward said they weren't, but he also left me in the middle of the woods when it was starting to get dark outside, so I wouldn't much too much value into his words."

The look on Sam's face made Bella feel like he wanted to interrogate her further, but his gaze snapped from her to the door, and he straightened, face immediately softening.

Bella turns as the door opens, and in steps a woman with long black hair and a collection of deep, jagged scars on her face. Bella immediately rips her eyes away from the woman's face and focuses on the wall next to her, wishing she could evaporate.

"Emily," Sam says, and it's like Bella isn't even standing in the middle of his house anymore. He moves right past her to sweep the woman into his arms and kisses her soundly, peppering her face with affection. Jared and Paul send out a muffled greeting through a mouthful of junk food.

"I think I should go," Bella mumbles, trying to ease around Emily and Sam, who were very much blocking the front door.

"Nonsense," Emily beams, and Bella once again refuses to focus too long on her face. Sam seems to relax even further at the action. "I insist that you stay for lunch."

"I wouldn't want to impose," Bella insisted.

"Don't worry about it," Emily says, already easing herself out of Sam's arms and moving to the kitchen, getting food out of the fridge. "Don't let Paul make you feel unwelcome."

Paul protests, sending a betrayed glare in Emily's direction that he quickly erase from his face as a rumbling noise comes from within Sam's chest. Bella wonders what she did to be cornered like this.

She can't be rude and leave, she'd never hear the end of it.

Which is how she ends up squished between Jared and Sam at the tiny little dining room table that was barely big enough to contain three men built like tanks, and certainly couldn't contain said men _and_ two additional people. Sam made sure Paul was on the opposite side of the table, and Bella was extremely grateful. She didn't think she'd be able to maintain her composure if she had to actively soak in the hatred that was radiating off him in waves.

Emily is sitting next to Sam, having just put the last of the food on the table, food which she absolutely refused to let Bella help make as she was the guest. There were plates piled high with hamburgers and hot dogs, and a huge pitcher of lemonade.

Bella wondered if she'd be lucky enough to get a piece of a hot dog bun; she'd seen the way Paul and Jared (he'd actually been polite enough to introduce himself and hadn't tried to burn a hole in her forehead like Paul) had torn apart the muffins and brownies, and if that was how they always were around food, she was content to stay far away lest she lose an arm.

Proving her point, Paul's hand darts out to yank the plate of burgers to himself. Sam's hand comes down quick and hard on Paul's the sharp crack sending a shiver down Bella's spine. Paul yanks his hand back and glowers, but doesn't try to grab the food again.

"You know the rules," Sam's voice rumbles. "Ladies eat first. Don't act cute just because Bella is here."

It's only by the grace of God that Bella manages to contain the chuckle-snort that tries its damndest to get out.

Bella lets Emily go first, and then she grabs two hot dogs for herself, pouring herself a glass of lemonade as well. The second she sets the pitcher down, the men dig in. Bella's first hot dog is halfway to her mouth as she pauses to watch in horror as Paul, Jared, and Sam pile their plates high with food. She didn't know it was possible for one person to consume seven burgers.

"Sorry about them," Sam said, and Bella jumped in surprise. He nodded over to where Paul and Jared were eating, already grabbing more food for their plates. "They act like they've never had food before."

"We do not," argued Jared through a mouth full of food.

"Don't speak with your mouth full!" Emily scolded, and Jared flushed.

Bella's eye flicked towards the front door, wondering if she'd be able to make it outside without tripping. Not likely, seeing as how Jared and Paul's huge bodies were blocking the narrow walkway.

"The paleface looks like she wants to make a run for it," Paul sneered. "What's the matter? Afraid of the natives? Thinking about running us over with your truck?"

"Fuck off," Bella snapped. "The only one here who I want to hit with my truck is _you_."

There's a moment of silence, and Bella blushes.

Jared starts laughing, cackling at the startled look on Paul's face. Emily hides a smile behind her own burger.

"She told you," Jared snickered.

"You do look uncomfortable, Bella," Emily notes.

Bella tries to word her response very carefully, "I appreciate you inviting me to stay for lunch, but...I don't really know you all that well, and my first interaction wasn't too stellar."

"We try not to take Paul outside, I'm sure you understand," Jared grins, twisting his body to avoid Paul's fist. "He's a bit uncivilized, it can't be helped. We're trying to correct the behavior, believe me, we are."

"Fuck off." Paul barked, snatching a hot dog from Jared's hands. "Just because I'm not waiting on the girl hand and foot doesn't mean I'm an asshole."

"It kind of does if you refuse to even use her name," Emily said sweetly.

There was a clear power dynamic that Bella could see. Sam was the alpha of the group, the head honcho, the one in charge. His word was law, and whenever there was a decision that needed to be made, all eyes fell on him. Emily had power, of that Bella was certain, but she also knew that if Emily wasn't Sam's girlfriend, Paul and Jared wouldn't listen to a word she said. It was difficult to determine whether Jared was above Paul or the other way around.

The entire group of men were intense, though, and Bella could understand why their presence made Jacob uncomfortable. Sam _seemed_ nice enough - if you ignored the fact that he cheated on his previous fiance with her cousin and was now engaged to said cousin - but there was something _off_ about him. Something about Sam made goosebumps rise on her skin, made her stomach turn. The last time she had a gut reaction like this was when she first met the Cullens. Maybe...

Bella pushed that thought away immediately. There was no way Sam was a vampire. The fact that she even entertained the thought, even if just for a second, was ridiculous.

Jared's voice shook her out of her musings.

"So, Swan, you doing anything later?"

Paul made a gagging noise, and Bella briefly entertained the idea of beaming her last hot dog at his head.

"Stop harassing her, Jared," Sam grumbled, pouring himself another glass of lemonade. "She doesn't even know you."

"She could get to know me," Jared waggled his eyebrows in Bella direction.

"Actually," Bella said, scooting her chair back a bit. "I'm studying with Jacob tonight. I should head over. Can I help you clean up before I go, Emily?"

"That'd be wonderful, thank you, Bella," Emily smiled, and Bella carefully angled her eyes away from her face.

The next twenty minutes were the most intense twenty minutes of her life. She couldn't speed through the clean up because then she'd look like she was in a hurry to get out of her. And she _was_ , but she didn't want to make it obvious. She also had to answer any questions Emily or Jared threw at her. Sam and Paul had stepped out, disappearing to go do whatever it is two grown men did in the middle of the night in nothing but cut off denim shorts. Bella wished she had the balls to follow them.

Once the clean up was done, Jared walked Bella to her truck.

"Are you and Jacob close?" Jared asked suddenly.

"He's my best friend," Bella said honestly. "Actually, I have something I need to ask you, it's about Jacob." Jared arched his eyebrow and she continued, "Sam...Sam isn't going to hurt Jacob, right?"

Jared's face darkened, and Bella knew she had made a mistake.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!"

Bella held her hands up in a placating gesture. "Listen, I'm not going to pretend to know what goes on in La Push. But Jacob is my friend, and I don't like seeing him uncomfortable or scared. So just...can you promise me Sam isn't going to hurt Jacob?"

Jared stared at her for a long while, and his face softened a bit.

"I promise. And I won't mention this conversation to Sam, either."

"Thank you." Bella's smile was genuine this time, and she got into her truck.

Jared watched her drive away, his form slowly disappearing from her mirror.

* * *

"It felt like I stepped into _The Twilight Zone_ ," Bella complained to Jacob later that evening, the two of them sprawled out on his porch. It was a cool night, and Bella preferred to be out in the open space rather than under Billy's watchful eye. "You were right about something being up with Sam. I just don't know what, though."

"I'm glad I'm not the only one who sees it," Jacob says, thumbing through his history textbook, rough draft of his essay finished on the chair next to him. "I still can't believe you made Jared promise Sam wouldn't hurt me."

"At least he seemed to take me seriously, which is more than I can say about some people."

Jacob's eyes flick towards the house and then back to hers.

"I just wish I knew what they wanted. If they wanted me to join their cult, wouldn't they have asked by now?"

"Maybe they want to feed you to Paul," Bella giggled. "God, he was so intense! I don't even know the guy but he's somehow already my mortal enemy."

Jacob laughs. "At least he didn't attack you. I heard from Embry that Paul didn't even get to finish high school because he had an aggression problem."

"Are you telling me I spent an entire afternoon with a man prone to breaking jaws?!"

"Hey, you're the one that wanted to go over there and give them brownies."

Bella rolled her eyes, uncrossing her legs and stretching them out in front of her, groaning when her knees crackled a bit.

"It wouldn't have been so bad if Emily hadn't insisted that I stay for lunch. I couldn't leave without looking like a total asshole, and the last thing I need is to make more enemies. Half the female population at my school already hate me. I see what you mean about the staring, though. Every time I made eye contact with Sam or the others it felt like I was seconds away from turning into stone."

"What did you even talk about? It's not like you guys have anything in common."

"Lunch was just smalltalk. Emily wanted to get to know me better and I guessed Sam humored her and played along. Before lunch, though, Sam wanted to know about the Cullens."

"The Cullens? Why did he want to know about them? It's not like he knew them personally. Actually, I doubt anyone on the rez ever met the guy."

"He was super interested in why they left," Bella frowned. "He wanted to know if they were coming back. And, you know, if anyone else had asked me about the Cullens and if they ever planned on returning to Forks, I'd understand, because Dr. Cullen was a great doctor and he did a lot of good work for the area. People were sad to see him go. But the way Sam was asking me made me feel like he'd be happier if the Cullens stayed gone."

Jacob shrugged. "A lot of people on the rez are wary of anyone from Forks in general. We don't have a lot of good history, as I'm sure you know."

Bella understood. The people on the reservation were well within their rights to be wary of white people, especially wealthy white people like the Cullens were. The history of La Push wasn't a pretty one, what with the tribes losing much of their land to colonizers and being shoved off somewhere else.

"I understand that, but there was something else there, I swear there was. Do you think there'd be any reason for Sam and the others to believe in the old legends?"

Jacob scoffed.

"Paul wouldn't listen to the old legends if you paid him. I don't know much about Jared. And I doubt Sam believes in them. It's only my dad and the other Elders who believe in that crap. To everyone else, they're just scary stories."

Bella wished there was someone else that knew about vampires. She would never tell Jacob, she knew that he didn't deserve to get involved in that, and she would never risk his life like that, but she wished she could talk supernatural theories with someone other than herself. She didn't think she was being paranoid about Sam thinking the Cullens were actually vampires. He knew something, or he was involved in something, and it was killing her to not know.

"You're probably right," Bella mumbled, vowing to look into it later. Jacob was already going through a lot, he didn't need her bullshit adding onto his.

"Am I going to see you again this week?"

"Most likely not," Bella replied. "Maybe Charlie and I will come over for dinner. I have a lot of work to do this week. I'm pulling extra hours at Mike's store, and then I'm having a sleepover with Jessica and Angela."

"Sleepover, huh?" Jacob leered.

"Ew," Bella laughed, throwing an eraser at his head. "Don't be gross, Jake."

"You should mention me to your friends, be my wing woman."

"I thought you were into Leah?"

Jacob flushed, swiftly turning away, long hair creating a curtain between them. He's suddenly very interested in his homework, shuffling the papers together and organizing them. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You want some girl advice? As a girl, I think I'm qualified for the job."

Jacob whips around so fast it makes Bella's own head spin. "You'd do that for me?"

"Of course," Bella grinned. "Okay, so, first thing? Be her friend before you're anything else. All good relationships are based on a friendship foundation. Being her friends lets you get to know her better and vice versa, and it's in that stage where you see if there's actually a spark there. If there isn't, then you still have a friend for life. Let her make the first move. I'm not saying don't let her know you like her, but girls like to know that guys aren't waiting in the wings to pressure them into a relationship. Let her know you'll still be around even if she doesn't want to date you."

"That...that actually makes a lot of sense."

"You should try to hang out with her this week. Invite Seth, too, because it lets her know that you care for her and her loved ones. Besides, Seth idolizes you and would love to see you more."

"You're the best, Bells," Jacob said, hugging her tight.

"And don't you forget it."


	5. Five

**FIVE**

* * *

The week following her encounter was Sam was a hectic one. Bella and her father went running every night up until Thursday, and having to climb the stairs to her room after was a new kind of hell. Her body ached, but it felt good to get the blood pumping. Later, after she was back from her sleepover, she and Charlie were going to sit down and create a new meal and exercise plan to follow.

When she wasn't at school or working out with her dad, Bella was at Newton's Olympic Outfitters. Putting up with Mike for hours on end was horrendous, but pulling the extra hours in made her paycheck look quite nice. With every day that passed, she became more and more excited about the sleepover.

It was so weird how social her life was now. Last year, her entire life had revolved around Edward and Alice. While it was strange to have such a rapidly expanding social circle, she didn't regret any of it. Having a better relationship with her peers and a better relationship with her father was easily becoming the best part of the year.

Bella stared at her duffle bag, the bag barren. She was supposed to pack for the sleepover, and she had no idea what she should bring. She mentally cursed her mother for causing her to miss out on so many social interactions. If she hadn't had to stay home and make sure nothing burned down, her social skills wouldn't be so pitiful now.

"What have I gotten myself into?" Bella asked herself, twisting her fingers together. When she'd initially agreed to the plans, she had been so excited. Now, though, Bella wondered if maybe she was overwhelming herself.

What did she pack? Since the sleepover wouldn't be ending until Sunday, she had to pack clothes other than pajamas to wear, but what? And what pajamas were acceptable? Was there a dress code she hadn't found out about yet? Did she bring her own towel for the shower or would one be provided to her at Jessica's? Where would she be sleeping? _When_ would she be sleeping? Could she expect any quiet time during this weekend or should she prefer for three and a half days of constant activity?

Bella groaned, throwing herself facedown on her bed, kicking the duffle bag onto the floor. She wondered if she could spend the rest of the morning wallowing in self pity. As she reached for the blanket to drag it over her head, her cellphone vibrated, nearly falling off the desk. Bella grabbed it and answered.

 _"Stop panicking, Bella. I can feel you stressing out from my house,"_ came Jessica's voice through the phone.

 _"Jesus,"_ Bella sighed, rolling herself up into a sitting position. "How'd you know?"

 _"Something tells me you don't get out much,"_ Jess laughs. _"Sleepovers aren't as complex as you're undoubtedly making them out to be, I promise. Pack two pairs of pajamas. You probably won't need the second pair, but honestly, I'm quite fond of food fights, so you should always be prepared to catch a cupcake to the chest. If you typically shower twice a day, then pack eight pairs of underwear. Since we're going to be spending the weekend out and about most of the time, bring good clothes. Nothing too fancy, because it's not like we're going to meet the president, but no ripped jeans, maybe some nice boots, pretty blouses. We can't walk the streets of Seattle in beat up sneakers and honey t-shirts. And a few bathing suits if you have more than one. We might swing by La Push if we have the time."_

As Jess was talking, Bella put the phone on speaker and started folding clothes, stuffing them in the bag.

"You're a lifesaver," Bella breathes, making sure to throw her hairbrush, toothbrush, and perfume into her bag before zipping it closed. "Have you spoken to Angela yet today?"

_"No, not yet. I'm actually surprised her parents are letting her come to a sleepover at my house seeing as how they think I live in a den of sin."_

"They do not!"

_"They totally do! You should see the side eye they give me whenever I'm over at their place. They think my slutty personality is going to rub off on Angela."_

"You're not a slut, and even if you were, there wouldn't be anything wrong with that. It's healthy to be confident with your sexuality."

_"You're preaching, and yet you have fucked anyone since Edward rolled out of town."_

Bella falls silent.

_"Bella?"_

"Um," Bella spluttered. "It's not...I...we..."

 _"You and Edward had sex, right?"_ Jessica pressed.

Bella face turns red, and she's so glad that Jessica can't see her right now. The only sound she can make is nervous little breaths.

 _"Oh, my god!"_ Jess cackled. _"This whole time I thought you and Edward were getting it on and that's why your dad hated him so much!"_

"Oh, please," Bella groaned. "Edward was the kind of guy who wanted to wait until marriage. You don't think I tried? Jess, the things I did to get him to have sex with me...I cannot believe I was that desperate."

_"That explains the constipated look Edward always had. Poor guy was backed up."_

"Oh, god." Bella giggled. "You're a mess."

_"Now that I know you haven't been getting laid, I hope you realize that it is now my responsibility to secure a very handsome, very well endowed man."_

"Jess!"

_"What? Every woman needs to get her back blown out in order to live a happy life. It's a scientific fact. Hot guys in your future aside, hurry up and get ready. I'm picking up Angela, and then we'll be on our way to pick you up. A couple of hours spent in the prison we call the public education system and then we're off to greener pastures."_

They said goodbye and hung up.

Bella quickly showered and got dressed, lugging her backpack and her duffle bag down the stairs with her, miraculously making it down the stairs without falling on her face. Charlie was sitting at the kitchen table, a steaming mug of coffee in front of him.

"You off to school?" he asked. "You gonna eat before you go?"

"Jess and Angela are picking me up, so we're gonna get food on the way there, I think."

Charlie eyed her duffle bag.

"Be careful this weekend, okay? Make sure you girls stay together, don't talk to strangers, and especially no more late night nature walks."

Bella flushed, but nodded her understanding. A car honk from outside saved her from having to reply. Bella kissed her father goodbye, and he slipped something into her hand as she hurried out the door.

Jessica waved excitedly from the driver's seat, Angela beside her. Bella tossed her duffle bag in Jessica's trunk and then slid into the backseat. As she was closing the door, she glanced down at her hand and balked at the amount of money her father had given her.

"Are you ready for a weekend of debauchery?!" Jessica screeched.

Angela put her face in her hands.

"If we can keep the sinning to a minimum, that would be great," Angela laughed.

Jessica backed out of the driveway onto the main road, drumming her fingers on the steering wheel. "What do you guys want for breakfast? Starting right now, we eat what we want when we want. I am ready to eat my weight in fries."

"Dunkin' Donuts?" Angela suggested, turning to glance at Bella.

"Sure," Bella grinned, stuffing the money into her pocket. "It's never too early for sugar."

* * *

The school day seemed to drag on forever. After homeroom, Bella and Jessica went their separate ways, and for every class leading up to lunch, Bella found herself staring at the clock, willing the hands to move faster. She received more than a few dirty looks as she fidgeted in her seat.

Finally, the lunch bell rang, and Bella nearly bowled Lauren over on her way out the door.

"Can this day get any longer?" Angela appeared next to Bella, groaning. "It feels like I've been in class _forever_."

"At least we only have two classes left before we can get out of here."

"That's two too many."

Jessica was waiting for them at their lunch table. It was still strange that they took control over what was previously the Cullen's territory, but the gossip that their move had sparked had died down considerably. The Cullen's were old news now, and Bella couldn't help to think that Edward was right; it was as if they never existed.

"Ladies," Jessica greeted them as they sat down, sliding over two extra salads that she'd purchased from the lunch line. "I suggest eating a light lunch, because tonight we will be gorging ourselves and we cannot have anyone getting sick before the weekend even starts. Also, we gotta get in our last bit of vegetables because I doubt we'll have anything healthy this weekend."

"I can already feel my digestive system crying out for help," Angela muttered under her breath, dutifully taking the salad.

"That's why we eat the nasty green stuff now so our kidneys dont collapse later," Jessica chirped.

Bella smiled as the two continued their banter. She hadn't seen Jess this happy in a long time, and she was glad she was here to experience. She didn't know how she went months without speaking to the two girls. It was baffling, looking back on her past behavior. The Cullens had been the focal point of her life, and for what? They had easily cut ties with her, and she doubted they'd ever look back. They wouldn't forget her, no, Edward made sure to remind her of how superior the minds of vampires were, but she probably wouldn't cross their minds again until she was nothing but bones.

Bella huffed a laugh into her salad. She used to wish she was a vampire, wished to have an eternity with Edward, and it's only now that she realizes how foolish she was. How could she have wanted to spend forever with someone as controlling and condescending as Edward? The thought made her shudder.

A nudge to her shoulder made Bella's head jerk up.

"Huh?"

"You alright?" Angela asked.

"Yeah," Bella assured her. Jessica's arched eyebrow showed that she thought otherwise. "I was just thinking about how Edward leaving was a good thing. Very much a good thing."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Jessica reached across the table to squeeze Bella's hand.

"I don't know, I don't want to start the weekend off on a sour note."

"You won't," Jessica grinned. "Something else that happens at sleepovers aside from the consumption of unhealthy food? We talk about our boy problems. You don't have to talk about it now, but if you ever want to talk about it over the weekend, Ang and I are here, and ready to talk shit about Edward at your command."

Bella laughed.

"I love you guys, you know that? So much."

* * *

 _"Wooooooo!"_ Jessica screamed as they sped down the highway, window down, her dark brown hair flying every which way.

"If we get pulled over, we're dead!" Bella laughed, her own hair nearly blinding her as it lashed at her eyes.

"Only if going eighty if a sixty-five doesn't kill us first," Angela points out, although she doesn't sound too upset.

"The cops won't give me a ticket because it would be a scandal if the police chief's daughter was caught speeding."

"I'm not the one speeding!" Bella protested. "I'm just along for the ride!"

"Thus making you an accessory!" Jessica sang in reply.

School had finally let out, and the three girls were on their way to Port Angeles. With the money her father had given her, Bella was excited to go shopping and treat herself to a nice meal. It was a strange feeling, as she'd never been one for shopping when her mom or Alice would drag her along. Bella suspected it was because she would spend the entire trip having to try on clothes that weren't even close to her style or comfort level.

"There's a _Forever 21_ that just opened in the city," Jess continued. "They're having a sale, everything in the store sixty percent off! I'm ready to blow my allowance on clothes I don't need, what say you guys?"

"I doubt I'll be able to find clothes that'll accommodate my height, but I'm down to watch you guys splurge," Angela said.

"Where do you usually shop for clothes?" Bella asked curiously, realizing that she never really thought about what Angela had to go through to find clothes that wouldn't be ridiculously short on her tall frame.

Angela blushed. "Walmart or the nearest department stores."

"That's nothing to be ashamed of," Bella quickly assured of. "There are lots of nice clothes in those stores, but maybe at Forever 21 we can find a shirt that's...a little more your age?"

Angela laughed. "You noticed my old lady clothes, huh?"

"Noticed? How could I not," Jessica grumbled, neatly steering the car into the exit lane. "I know your mom picks your stuff out because you have to be a good example for the church or whatever. Goodness, Ang, I don't know how you put up with it! It's like the best years of your life don't even belong to you because you spend so much time having to be this perfect little doll for your family."

"I just remind myself that college is gonna be here sooner than I think, and then I'll be free. The goal is to get a scholarship to a school far, far away. East coast, maybe."

"Please don't start talking about college." Bella slid down in her seat. "I feel like you two have some sort of idea on what you want to do when you graduate high school, but I have none! It feels like I'm just floating aimlessly."

"What do you like to do?"

"I don't know," Bella said. "I think reading, writing, and I enjoy the government classes we have."

"Maybe you could major in English," Angela suggested. "Or law. Or both."

"I've been thinking about going to a trade school or something," Jessica admits. "I haven't told my parents yet because they would flip, though."

"What about you, Angela?" Bella asked.

"I've always wanted to be a neurologist. I also like psychology. Maybe I'll double major, and when I go to med school I can become certified in both."

"Jesus fucking Christ, Ang," Jessica gaped. "You're gonna be the richest out of all of us! Don't be surprised when I come to you asking for a loan one day."

"Enough about school," the tall girl laughed. "It's making my brain hurt. This weekend is supposed to be about unhealthy eating habits and trash talking boys."

"Fuck Mike Newton!" Jessica exclaimed, pulling smoothly into the parking lot for the shopping center. The car went cleanly into a parking space. "I don't know what I ever saw in him anyways. Now, onwards!"

* * *

Bella observed herself in the fitting room mirror. She, Jess, and Angela had claimed the largest fitting room in Forever 21 and had stuffed armfuls of clothes on the bench and hooks. Bella had never shared a fitting room with anyone other than her mother, and those times couldn't be classified as a pleasant experience, however, she pushed herself to get the full sleepover experience under her belt. She refused to let the past control her.

Jessica had picked out a pair of high wasted jeans for her, and Bella had to admit...she looked _good_. She had never been one for tight clothing, usually buying things that hid her figure, but she liked the way the jeans felt.

"Stop hogging the mirror," Jess complained, hip checking her out of the way. "Those jeans make your butt look great, by the way. You should get them."

"I've never worn clothes this tight," Bella frowned.

"It's never too late to start!" Jessica says, doing a twirl in front of the mirror. "What do you think about this skirt? Too short?"

"If you plan on wearing it to school, absolutely. The second you step out of your car you'll get coded." Angela scoffed.

"I heard there's going to be a party at La Push this weekend," Jessica grinned. "We could swing by."

"I'm guessing this is your way of getting me to do more scandalous activities," Bella laughed. "If I get caught drinking underage, my dad would kill me. It looks bad for the chief's daughter to be breaking the law."

"Then we won't get caught!" Jessica jumped up and down, tugging Bella close. "Come on, guys! We have got to live our lives while we're still in our youth!"

Angela hesitated. She was all for having fun, but she was also very aware of whose daughter she was. If the pastor's daughter was caught knocking back drinks, her family's reputation would be damaged beyond repair, and her parents would never forgive her or allow her freedom. On the other hand...when would she ever get another opportunity like this?

Bella tugged off the jeans and pulled on a skirt Jessica had picked out for her. It was on the short side.

"It could be fun," Bella said slowly. Her thought process was similar to Angela's; she was the police chief's daughter, and if word got around that she was drinking, her father could lose his career. "We can't drink, though. I'm serious. I won't damage my dad's career over a party."

"I'd be comfortable drinking in the house with just the three of us," Angela suggested. "Just no drinking at the party."

Jessica pouted, but conceded. "I accept your terms!"

The three girls spent the next two hours shopping, arms filled with bags. Bella had purchased the jeans from Forever 21, as well as the mini skirt. It was too cold for the skirt, but Bella planned on wearing the jeans to the party along with a dark green blouse Jessica convinced her to buy. Walking beside her, Angela had a small smile on her face. Bella imagined it was from buying clothes that she actually liked.

"I'm starving," Angela said. "Let's put the bags in the car and get something to eat."

"It's official," Jessica stated, steering them towards the parking lot. "Angela is the brains of this operation."

When deciding on a food place, Bella quickly ushered her friends past the Italian restaurant Edward had taken her to just last year. Instead, they settled for treating themselves at Chili's.

"I'm so excited for pizza tonight." Jessica said as she scanned the menu.

Angela giggled. "Jess, we're about to stuff our face with burgers and fries, and you're already thinking about dinner?"

"You guys are my best friends, alright? I'm so glad we can have this sleepover. Otherwise, it would've been a lonely Friday night where I scrolled through social media in the dark."

"We love you, too, Jess," Bella smiled. "Maybe let's eat a light lunch since we'll be gorging ourselves on sugar tonight? I'd rather not destroy the lining in my stomach quite yet. I have to make it last for a few more decades."

"A super large order of loaded cheese fries?" Angela suggested.

 _"Yes!"_ Jessica and Bella exclaimed in unison.

The waiter came and took their order. Bella was hit with sudden realization that, aside from going to the diner with her dad sometimes, the only other person she'd gone out to eat with was Edward. It made her sad to think that if Edward hadn't left, she never would've reconnected with her classmates.

"I just want to make it clear that this weekend is going to be as wild as I can possibly make it," Jessica forewarned, her hands clasped together under her chin. "This is Bella's very first sleepover, so we have to make sure we cover all the bases."

"What, exactly, constitutes a sleepover?" Bella asked. "From what I've seen on TV, there's been the occasional instance of streaking. I don't think I'm down for that."

The waiter returned with their drinks, three glasses of _Coca-Cola_ , and disappeared again.

"Okay, this weekend won't be _that_ wild," Jessica assured her. "Besides, I can't get you guys into too much trouble anyways. You're the daughter of the police chief, and Angie's father is a pastor. There actually is a limit."

Angela grinned. "Maybe during our senior year we can throw caution to the wind. Go out with a bang."

"With my luck," Bella grumbled. "That _'bang'_ would be me falling off the stage at graduation."

Jessica choked on her coke. "Oh, god! Do _not_ jinx yourself!"

"After getting you educated on sleepover culture, we can work on your clumsiness," Angela suggested. "I'm sure you're tired of tripping all the time."

Bella nodded solemnly. Forks had grown on her, but she had to admit, moving to a place that had more rain and snow was not good for her clumsy nature. She had never fallen or slipped this much in Arizona.

The waiter reappeared with a huge plate of loaded cheese fries, and smiled. "Enjoy! Let me know if you need anything!"

The girls immediately dug in.

It was the very definition of an unhealthy meal, and a great way to celebrate the end of their shopping trip. Crispy fries covered in cheddar cheese, jalapeños, bacon, green peppers, and ranch. They laughed and flicked ranch at each other as they enjoyed their meal.

Angela held up a french fry coated in cheese and ranch, and said, "To us!"

Bella and Jessica grabbed their own fries, returning the sentiment.

* * *

Angela focused intently on drawing a pink flower on Jessica's white painted fingernail, tongue poked out in concentration. In Jessica's other hand, she held a greasy piece of pepperoni pizza.

After their fries Chili's, they'd returned to Jessica's house, set up the TV for movies, and ordered pizza. Upon entering, Bella was stunned at Jess' room. It wasn't messy or anything, but it was her first time being in the space of another teenage girl, and she found her own room in comparison to be lacking. Her room was bland and neat, while Jessica's room showed personality; it was lived in. Posters of her favorite actors, favorite bands. An insane amount of colorful pillows. A bookshelf overflowing with novels and magazines. Bella smiled. She felt closer to Jessica now.

"I can't believe I was dieting for Mike," Jessica grimaces. "Months of my life missing out on great food, and he didn't even ask me out!"

"Mike's an asshole," Bella said.

"Speaking of assholes," Jess said. "I am so sorry for the way I behaved when Mike was chasing after you. You were clearly not interested and too shy to say anything."

"It's okay. I'm just glad he's finally leaving me alone."

"Did you quit your job at his parents' store?" Angela said, flipping her hair so that it wouldn't smudge Jessica's nails.

"No, I think my months of acting like a zombie finally scared him off," Bella replied, carefully inserting _She's The Man_ into the DVD player. "It's a decent job, an easy way to make money. I'm just glad he's finally taken the hint that I'm not interested."

"It was the same way when Lauren moved here, you know." Jessica mumbled around a mouthful of pizza, using her foot to slide the box over to Bella so she could grab a slice. "She moved back when we were still in middle school, and the second she walked through the door, Mike was all over her. I guess his type will forever be shiny new girls."

"Speaking of guys," Bella nearly dropped a glop of cheese on the floor, catching it with her finger at the last second. "Ang, you never did tell us what happened between you and Ben. Was it solely the height?"

Angela suddenly looked very nervous, her hand jerking and smearing pink nail polish across Jessica's hand.

"Of course that's the only reason," she snapped. "What else could it be?"

"Woah, hey!" Bella held her hands up. Her heart raced, wondering if she'd just ruined her friendship with the taller girl yet again by pressing. She'd never known Angela to raise her voice or be outwardly irritated, and it was startling to experience.

An awkward silence fell over the room. Bella stared down at her half eaten slice of pizza, the grease pooling onto the top of the cardboard box. Jessica's gaze fell between Bella and Angela as she cleaned the excess polish off of her hands.

"It wasn't height," Angela whispered. "I told Ben that's why I wanted to break up, but really..."

"Hey," Jessica murmured. "You don't have to tell us if you don't want to. But Bella and I? We would never judge you for anything. I mean, come on. We've all done crazy things over boys. I starved myself for Mike and Bella went comatose over Edward. The way I see it, we're all losers, and that's why we're best friends."

Angela gave a watery chuckle.

"The truth is," she said. "I broke up with Ben because...I'm gay."

Angela began to cry, little sobs making her shoulders hunch in. Bella and Jessica immediately abandoned their seats to wrap their arms around her, tears in their eyes, too. Angela sobbed into their chests. They didn't need to know why Angela had kept this part of herself carefully locked away; she was the pastor's daughter. If the pastor's daughter came out as a lesbian, well...it wouldn't be pretty. Bella wouldn't pretend to know what goes on behind closed doors in the Weber household, however, what she and Jess did know was that every aspect of Angela's life was already strictly controlled and monitored by her parents. With that kind of environment, it's obvious that anything less of precise conformity would be swiftly punished and shut down.

Bella could only imagine how much it meant to Angela to say the words out loud, to verbally admit that she was not who her parents expected her to be, that she did not like what society expected her to like. Bella couldn't relate to Angela's personal experience of coming out, but she did know what it was like to keep secrets, knew what it was like to put yourself last day in and day out. It hurt.

"Thank you for telling us," Jessica whispered into Angela's hair. "Thank you for trusting us with this. We won't tell anyone, okay?"

"Not a soul." Bella agreed.

They pulled apart, although they still sat in a close circle, holding each other's hands. The nail polish on Jessica's fingernails, some of which had smudged and came off a bit when they were hugging, smeared across her friends' hands.

Angela sniffed, using her shoulder to wipe her nose. "I tried so hard to make myself like Ben. He's a great friend, but I didn't want him the way I was expected to. It was so hard to pretend, and everyday... just everyday living a lie was so, _so_ draining. He put his all into the relationship, and I couldn't return his feelings. Not even a little. He was so sweet, though, that I convinced myself that I could grow to love him, that I could fix myself over time."

Jessica wanted to tell Angela that _there was nothing to fucking fix about her_ , but stayed silent. Angela needed to get this off her chest. There would be time later to boost her self esteem.

"When did you first realize?" Jessica asked gently instead. "If you don't mind me asking."

Angela gave a small smile. "It was in the eighth grade. You and Lauren were so excited to go to high school because you wanted to date boys, and all I could think about was how pretty Brianna Storm was. I wanted to hold her hand. I wanted her to smile at my jokes. I wanted to sit next to her in every class. I wanted to kiss her cheek. I knew that I liked her the way that you liked Mike, and that scared me." She sighed heavily. "My parents would never accept me. I've heard the way they talk. I can never trust them with this part of myself, and it's awful. It feels like I'm a prisoner in my own home, in my own body. All my life I've been raised to believe that being a homosexual is shameful, and I've been working to get past that. Breaking up with Ben helped a little."

"You know my door is always open, right?" Bella asked. "Because you can come stay with me whenever, for as long as you need to. My dad would help hide you and no one would question it because's he's the chief."

Angela laughed. "Thank you. I appreciate it."

"I hope you realize that you aren't escaping from my matchmaking skills," Jessica clapped her hands together excitedly. "When you're free of your parents and away at college, I'm going to find you a tall, beautiful woman that'll make your heart race, and the two of you are going to live in a nice little cottage on the coast, with a garden full of roses."

"Oh, god," Angela groaned, putting her face in her hands, but Bella could see her cheeks lift up in a smile.

"We'll build the cottage ourselves if we have to," Bella declared. "That's what friends do. Friends help friends get their happily ever after."

"You guys are the best." Angela smiled. "I feel so much better now that you guys know. You aren't...you aren't afraid to be friends with me, right?"

"Angela, listen to me," Jessica said, grabbing her hand, and leaving one hand free for Bella to do the same. "Bella and I are never going to stop being your friend. No matter what anyone else says, you are not perverted, or anything like that okay? What your parents have been saying about LGBT community, it's wrong. You're not disgusting, you're not sinful, and you're not going to hurt anyone. And I am going to keep saying it. Everyday until you believe me, and even after."

"You're not getting rid of us." Bella promised. "No matter what happens, Jess and I are going to be here."

Angela began to cry again only, this time, they weren't tears of sadness. They were tears of joy. Jessica quickly pulled the other two girls into a tight hug.

Angela knew she was going to be okay.

"Enough about me," Angela said, voice still a bit thick with tears. "Let's talk about the mess that is Edward Cullen."

"Oh, God," came Bella's muffled reply, her face pressed against's Angela's shoulder. "Let's just pretend he doesn't exist."

"Oh, no you don't," Jessica said, arching an eyebrow. "We are all going to cry tonight. It's therapeutic. Let's hear about your shitty ex-boyfriend."

Bella huffed and leaned back on one hand, the other picking up her slice of pizza from before. Grease dripped down her fingers onto her pants.

Edward was a complicated topic. He was a vampire, and Bella knew that she'd never truly be able to open up about the depths of her relationship with Edward. But she could surely make something up that was close to the truth?

"Edward was my first boyfriend," Bella began, chewing on her pizza thoughtfully. "I would say that guys never paid any attention to me, but I think that maybe I was just oblivious. I mean, we've seen how Tyler and Mike were. And I guess... it made me feel special, you know? To know that I got the hot guy that everyone had said was unattainable. I thought that maybe, if I could get someone like him, then clearly I had some redeeming qualities."

"Your relationship with Edward was bad long before the breakup?" Angela asked cautiously.

Bella nodded solemnly. "Edward and Alice... they had very...strong personalities. They told me what to wear, when to eat and what to eat." Once she got started about all the ways Edward treated her poorly, she couldn't stop. "Edward controlled where I went and who I went with. He even managed to get all his classes changed so that he had the same schedule as me. I literally could not escape."

"Dude," Jessica said, and she looked _pissed_. "What the _fuck_?!"

"Bella," Angela whispered. "Please tell me you know that that's not how relationships should be."

"I know that now," Bella said, and her voice cracked. She dropped her half eaten slice of pizza back in the box. "I think I always knew, deep down. I just felt so honored that someone as handsome and rich was paying attention to me. I followed his lead and let him treat me like a child. I let Alice treat me like a doll. I put up with it because I wanted them to keep wanting me.

"I hate him," Bella sobbed, the realization coming to her suddenly, tears streaming down her face. " _I hate all of them_. They told me they loved me, that they cared about me. All of them acted like they had the intention of keeping me around. And then they just left, with no warning! They changed their numbers, their email addresses. It's like I never even existed! And I kept asking myself why I wasn't good enough, why couldn't I ever be good enough. I loved him so much, and it feels like I was just a toy to him. Edward broke up with me in the fucking woods and _left_ me there. He _knows_ I don't know Forks that well, he _knows_ I'm not athletic, and he still _left_ me in the middle of nowhere like I was _nothing_!"

Bella hunched over, sobbing into her hands. There were hands on her, not constricting, but a reminder that they, her real friends, were there for her, listening, taking her pain on as their own.

"He told me my mind was weak, that I'd forget him. He said that he didn't want me, that he never did, and then he made me promise not to be reckless, as if he had any right to demand things from me. I let him and Alice control and micromanage me, and I feel like I lost so much of my life crying over him when he doesn't deserve it. I hate him so much... but I don't know how to let him go. I don't know how to let _them_ go."

"Bella," Jessica murmured, coaxing Bella's head up so that she could look her in the eye. "I can't tell you how to move past this. What the Cullen's did to you, Bella... it was awful. The fact that you can acknowledge how cruel they were is good, but these kinds of wounds? They won't heal overnight. And, eventually, you're gonna have to stop looking back, and instead, look forward."

"And if Edward or any of the Cullens ever show their faces around here again, we won't let them near you," Angela swore, fire in her eyes. "I'll run Edward over if I ever see him again, insurance premiums be damned."

"Thank you guys," Bella croaked. "So much. It feels so good to have gotten that off my chest. I felt like I had to keep it all to myself."

"We're never going to force you to share anything with us." Angela said. "However, we'll always be here. No matter what."

The silence that followed was comfortable as Bella got herself together. Jess handed her tissues to clean her face, and Bella took a few deep breaths to ground herself again.

"I didn't know sleepovers would be so emotionally overwhelming," Bella stated with a watery laugh. "I don't think I've ever talked or cried this much in my entire life."

"That's what sleepovers are for!" Jess exclaimed. "It's a time where the girls get together to have simultaneous breakdowns and eat their weight in sugar. It's a long treasured tradition that's survived the passage of time."

"You haven't cried today." Angela noted, jabbing a finger into Jessica's forearm.

"The last meltdown I had was when I asked Edward out and got emotionally destroyed."

"You mean Edward's always been an asshole?!" Bella's mouth fell open.

"Oh, yeah," Jessica nodded sagely, her eyes flickering briefly to the TV. The movie was nearly over; they'd have to put in another one soon or rewind this one. "When the Cullen's first moved to Forks, I asked Edward out on a date. He then proceeded to tell me that he would rather do absolutely anything else. He then proceeded to give me side eye in any classes that we had together, and he always looked so pissed when we had to interact for class."

Bella silently wondered how Edward could be a mind reader, and yet be the most tactless person ever. It seemed like every week she was learning more and more of her ex-boyfriend's flaws.

"Anyways, after that, I always did my best to avoid him. His siblings, too. I tried to talk to Rosalie once, and she almost tore my face off. I don't know how you put up with them, Bella. They were insane."

"You have no idea," Bella mumbled. "Hey, start the movie over. I've never seen this one, and I want to the full sleepover experience that was promised to me."

Jessica shoved herself to her feet towards the TV. "It's not the full sleepover experience until we get the popcorn and cupcakes. You guys want extra butter?"

* * *

Jessica is the first person to wake up Friday morning.

She grimaces as she sits up, raising a hand to her face to touch the sticky substance that was smeared from her hairline to her chin. Looking at her fingers, she realizes that she had collapsed into a cupcake last night. There was also some grains of salt between her fingers. Turning to look over her shoulder, she spots the crushed dessert next to one of her pillows.

Last night, they'd thrown all the pillows and blankets on the floor to make a nest, and they'd smashed themselves together as they watched movies and stuffed their faces with sugar. Jessica had gone all out with the snacks she'd bought for this weekend. It had been forever since she'd had a sleepover, even longer since she had a sleepover with people that she actually liked, and she'd wanted the weekend to be perfect.

Cuddling together last night was extremely necessary last night. Angela had come out and Bella opened up about her messy breakup. She hadn't shown it last night, but Jessica was worried. Angela's parents were very passionate about their beliefs, and their inability to loosen the fuck up was one of the reason's Jessica's own parents limited contact with them. And with Bella, her devastating breakup was a lot more complex than she'd originally thought. Finding out that Bella's relationship with Edward had been _abusive_... it was a lot to taken in. Basically, she wasn't qualified to really give advice in these situations. However, what she _could_ do is be the best friend she could possibly be, and give them a great weekend of fun.

Rising carefully, Jessica stepped around Bella and Angela and went to the bathroom. Minty toothpaste and hot water was calling her name, and who was she to ignore it.

After brushing her teeth, Jessica hopped in the shower, eager to get the remaining icing out of her hair. Yesterday had been rough, but the conversation last night was much needed. Now that emotional connections were secured, Jessica was confident that she, Bella, and Angela could spend the rest of the weekend going as wild as they could. Jessica was excited to break out the alcohol tonight. Her parents never cared when she took from the liquor cabinet as long as she didn't take too much, and she had to admit that getting tipsy in her bedroom with her two best friends was a lot better - not to mention safer - than going out to a party and getting drunk. Safety aside, it wouldn't do well for the police chief's daughter and the pastor's daughter to be caught drinking underage.

Rinsing her hair one last time, Jessica turned the water off, grabbed two towels to wrap her body and hair, and then yanked open the bathroom door. She made sure her towel was secure around her body before crouching down next to where Angela and Bella were still unconscious.

"GOOD MORNING LADIES!" Jessica shouted.

Bella jerked awake with a disgruntled snort, moving her head out of the way in time to avoid Angela's flying fist.

"Dude," Bella groaned, rolling over and burrowing back into the mountain of pillows. "Not cool."

"No more sleep!" Jessica exclaimed. "We can sleep when we're dead! Get up, get dressed! We have the whole weekend ahead of us!"

Angela pushed herself to her knees, dark hair a messy curtain around her face. "I didn't realize you were a morning person."

"I'm not," Jessica said cheerfully, tugging Bella out of the pillows and to her feet, pushing her towards the bathroom.

Bella stumbled a bit before steadying herself, shooting Jessica a dark look before shuffling towards her bag to get her toiletries.

The girls got ready for the day, Angela shuffling into the bathroom after Bella. While Angela was in the shower, Jessica and Bella cleaned up the room, breaking out the vacuum to get the salty popcorn pieces off the carpet. By the time Angela stepped out of the bathroom, dressed and ready to go, the room was presentable again.

"What's the plan for today, captain?" Bella asked, shoving her foot into her sneakers.

"Well," Jessica said, tossing the blankets and pillows into the corner so that they could easily get them again for tonight. "I was thinking Angela and I could actually show you around Forks, show you there's more to this small town that you thought. And then around lunch, we could go to the movies. I was thinking we could see _The Hangover_ , eat some nachos and wash it down with slushees. Sound good?"

Angela smiled. "Only on one condition. We have to have pancakes for breakfast."

* * *

Bella nearly went careening off the sidewalk as she tripped over nothing, Angela quickly grabbing her arm to steady her. They had just left the theater and were making the trek back to Jessica's car. As it was Friday night, the shopping center was busy, and so they'd had to park farther away from the theater

"I ate way too many nachos," Jess moaned. "Why did you guys challenge me to eat that many?"

"We did not challenge you!" Bella protested. "You said, 'Watch how many nachos I can eat.' When we told you not to do that, you said, 'You don't tell me what to do!'"

"Oh, shut up." Jessica grumbled, linking her arms with the two girls. "I'm only gonna be this young once. Once I'm thirty, I won't be able to eat like this anymore. Gotta live while I still can."

As they walked towards the direction of the car, the crowds started to disperse. The amount of people on the sidewalk began to dwindle, as did the amount of cars in the parking lot.

Angela began to slow down.

"You okay?" Bella asked, frowning.

Angela shook her head. "I have a bad feeling. Maybe we shouldn't go this way."

"What are you talking about?" Jessica said, stopping too. "It would take us twice as long to double back to the theater and go the other way to the car. It's probably just the nachos you ate, you know that cheese was probably expired."

Angela hesitantly continued walking, Jess chattering away. Bella nudged Angela with her elbow, doing her best to give her a comforting smile. Angela shook herself.

 _Probably nothing_ , she thought to herself, although it didn't feel like that.

After a few minutes, they finally reached the parking lot where they'd parked. The car was still some ways away, far enough that they could only make out the vague shape of it if they squinted.

Just as Jessica stepped to cross the street, three men turned around the corner, shoving and laughing amongst themselves. They stopped when they spotted the girls.

"Hey, sweetheart!" one man yelled at Jess. "Where you going?"

Jessica quickly stepped back up on the sidewalk, knowing that no matter how much she wanted to escape to her car, it wouldn't be smart to lead them to where she'd parked. Angela and Bella quickly latched on to Jessica arms as they hurried in the opposite direction of the men, leaving the car behind.

"Aww, don't be like that!" another crowed, the voices growing louder. "We could show you and your friends a good time."

"I know you bitches hear us talking to you. Didn't your parents ever teach you any manners?"

The voices grew louder.

Just then, two more men stepped out from the shadows of a side alley, malicious grins on their faces.

"Where do you think you're going?"

Jessica, Angela, and Bella began to run. The men gave chase, splitting off into groups down different streets to try and cut them off.

The girls realized, rather quickly, that they'd chosen the wrong direction to run in. The well lit shops disappeared, and instead, they were tearing down the sidewalks in front of empty store fronts. The cars vanished, the parking lot empty in these parts. There was no one to turn to for help.

The two men that were trailing them from behind grew closer. Bella's heart pounded, her legs shook. She remembered the last time she'd been in this position. That time, Edward had been there to save her. Now, she was on her own.

Jessica skidded to a stop, and before Bella and Angela could react, she'd kneed one guy in the balls hard, causing him to collapse. To the other, she pepper sprayed, then sprayed the one she'd kneed, too. The men collapsed on the ground, screaming and coughing as the pepper spray did its job.

"Come on!" Jessica yelled, urging Angela and Bella to double back to where they'd come so they could make it to the car, giving Angela and Bella no time to marvel at Jess' bravery.

They'd made it back up the street and had managed to make it halfway down another, when something awful happened. They were forced to split up. The other three men, who'd split off earlier, had begun to come down the street, about to turn the corner where they'd see the girls head on. Their shadows moved quickly in their direction. Angela and Jessica were gone, diving down a narrow walkway between buildings to find somewhere to hide.

Bella tripped, hitting the ground hard. She froze. She couldn't move. She was stuck, kneeling in plain sight at the entrance of the street. Her heart felt like it was in her throat. Her emotions were all over the place, but Bella could identity that she was afraid, terrified, actually. Bella mentally screamed at her legs to move, but it was no use. It was too late.

The men rounded the corner.

"Where the fuck did they go?!" One of them demanded, stopping under the street light to look around.

"How the fuck should I know?" A man with a scar on his cheek grumbled. "I told you we shouldn't have split up."

Bella shook where she kneeled, mouth agape. She was right in front of them. She was _right in front of them_. And yet...could they not see her?

"Shit." The last man snarled. He yanked off his hood, exposing his sandy brown hair. "Wait a second." The guy paused, and looked around, eyes narrowed. Bella held her breath, a tear sliding down her cheek. She prayed that whatever made her invisible made her stay that way. "Do you hear that?"

Bella feared that they'd turn to look at her. Instead, they turned in the direction of the men that Jess had taken down.

If she listened hard enough, she could faintly hear them coughing and yelling.

The men took off towards their friends, and the second Bella was sure that they were gone, she was on the move. She didn't know where she was doing, only moving as fast as she possibly could in what she hoped was the direction of the movie theater. She didn't know where Jess and Angela were, but she was confident, after listening to the men, that they'd managed to escape.

Bella didn't know how long she had been running, only knew that her chest hurt, her head hurt, everything fucking hurt. She stumbled around a corner, hoping to find herself back at the main shopping center.

The sound of tires squealing on the asphalt made Bella scream and collapse to her knees, fearing that the men had come back and were about to take her away. She balled her fists and prepared to fight, recalling her father's instructions to never let anyone take her to a secondary location.

The car came to an abrupt stop, and out jumped Angela and Jess.

"Bella!" Angela wailed, hauling Bella to her feet.

"Get in!" Jessica yelled. " _GET IN!_ "

Angela ushered Bella into the back of the car, sliding in beside her, and Jessica peeled away from the curb.

Bella shook violently.

"Where did you go?!" Jessica screamed, tears streaming down her face as she tore away from the shopping center. "Where the _fuck_ did you go?! We turned around and you were fucking gone!"

"I'm sorry," Bella sobbed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

"Oh, God." Angela's fingers gripped Bella tightly, her nails digging into her skin. "Oh, God, Bella, no, don't apologize. We were just so worried! Where did you go?! Did they hurt you?!"

"No," Bella cried. "I...I managed to hide. I saw them walk past me. When they left I tried to find you."

"Jess," Angela begged. "Jess you have to slow down."

The speedometer's needle inched towards ninety. Jessica stared straight ahead, and from the back you might've been able to assume that she was calm, if not for the death grip she had on the steering wheel, or the occasional hitching of her shoulders.

"Jess!"

The car slowed to eighty. Seventy. Sixty five. And the sped up again. Before Angela could protest, Jessica whipped the car into the parking lot of the Walmart and hit the brakes hard. She moved the gearshift to park.

Jessica collapsed against the steering wheel, gut wrenching sobs escaping her.

Angela and Bella wrapped their arms around Jessica as best as they could from the back seat, crying together as the gravity of the situation fully hit them.

They were there for what felt like hours.

When Jessica managed to catch her breath, she turned to look Bella in the eye, clutching her arm.

"I'm sorry," Jessica weeped. "It's not your fault we got separated. I really thought they got you. Angela and I found a store that had left their back door ajar, and we hid in there. When we'd looked behind us, you weren't there. I'm so sorry we didn't go back. Bella, I'm so sorry."

"I'm not angry," Bella assured her two friends. "I know you didn't leave me on purpose. I tripped and had only barely managed to hide in time."

"I've never been more afraid in my life," Angela whispered. Bella pulled Angela closer to her.

Bella hadn't felt fear like this since a few months ago, when she thought James had taken her mother. But even then, her only fear was death. What happened tonight was an entirely different genre of fear.

They sat in the Walmart parking lot for twenty more minutes, cleaning their faces off with tissues and holding each other close as they processed what nearly happened to them.

Once they'd calmed down, Jessica started the car again, and began to drive home. The car ride was absolutely silent.

* * *

Bella laid awake in Jessica's bed, where all three of them had collapsed. She was wedged between Jessica and Angela, all of them wrapped tightly around each other. Angela had cried herself to sleep, and when Bella glanced over, she could see dried tear tracks on Angela's cheeks.

On her left, Jessica laid.

"Bella?" Jessica whispered. "Are you awake?"

"Yes," Bella whispered back.

"They really didn't hurt you? You weren't just saying that so we wouldn't feel guilty? You really got away?" Jessica's voice shook, tears coming to her eyes.

Bella said nothing about her temporary invisibility. She didn't know how to explain, and, quite frankly, just wanted to forget that it ever happened.

"They really didn't hurt me." Bella assured her quietly, her hand reaching for Jessica's in the dark. Jessica squeezed her hand tightly. "I got away."

Jessica hiccuped a sob, snuggling closer to Bella.

Bella wasn't sure how she was able to sleep, but eventually, darkness took her.

* * *

Bella was so thankful that Jessica's parents were out of town that weekend. She wasn't sure how they would've explained their sullen faces.

They sat silently at the kitchen table, staring down at their bowls of untouched cereal, the oats getting soggier as they remained untouched in the milk.

When they'd woken up that morning, they'd only had a minute before the memories of last night came flooding back in. They showered and dressed for the day silently, unsure of what could possibly be said about the horrors that they almost experienced.

Bella looked up from her bowl, staring at the hunched forms of Jessica and Angela. Although she reassured them yesterday that she knew that they didn't leave her on purpose, she sensed that her disappearing act had truly shaken them.

"Hey," Bella blurted. Jess and Angela looked up at her. "We should do something fun today. To cheer us up."

Angela chuckled darkly. "I would rather not leave the house ever again, actually."

"I second that," Jessica whispered, swirling the spoon around in her bowl, the metal clinking against the side.

"Look," Bella said. "What happened yesterday...was terrifying. And obviously we're not just going to get over it. But we need to do something fun that'll cheer us up. I was thinking that we could skip the party, and instead go see my friends on the reservation. What we need is a chill night, away from the dark streets of Port Angeles."

"The party _is_ ruined for me," Angela admitted. "And...it would be nice to get my mind off last night. Speaking of which...are we going to tell our parents?"

If Bella had been the same person from last year, she would've said no. Now, though, she wanted to tell her dad. She wanted to run into his arms and be comforted in the knowledge that she'd gotten home safe.

"I think we should," Bella said slowly. "I'm pretty sure my dad's not gonna let me leave the house again, though. Although, that might be a good thing."

"What if we just tell your dad?" Jessica asked. "My parents...I doubt they'd care. They'd probably blame me. And Angela's parents don't exactly exude warm and fuzzy."

"I can talk to my dad." Bella suggested. "He might want us to try and give him a description of the guys that we saw, but if you're really worried about your parents reactions, he could keep it quiet."

Angela nodded. "I like that idea. I...thank you, Bella."

"I'm still really sorry about leaving you." Jessica whimpered, wiping at her eyes. Angela nodded in agreement.

"Really, I'm not mad," Bella promised. "I'm just glad we got out alive. We back it back safely, although Jess' driving nearly killed us."

Jessica giggled, Angela and Bella following suit.

"Come on," Jess said, standing and grabbing her bowl. "I'm making us waffles, because cereal is a sad meal, and then we're going to meet Bella mysterious friends."

* * *

The drive to La Push was a much calmer ride than the last time that they were in Jessica's car. This time, the radio was on low in the background, and they chatted quietly amongst themselves. Angela and Jess asked Bella about her friends on the reservation, and Bella spoke of Jacob and Billy, who were family friends.

Bella hoped that Jacob wasn't busy, cursing herself for not thinking to call ahead.

"Take a right here," Bella instructed Jessica, whose driving was much calmer today. "It's the red house."

When Jessica parked the car, Bella told them to stay in while she went ahead to make sure Jacob could hang out today.

Bella knocked on the door, and Billy answered, smiling up at her.

"Bella!" he exclaimed. "We weren't expecting you!"

"Hey, Billy," Bella smiled. "I was wondering if Jacob was free to hang out today? I wanted to introduce him to my friends." She gestured behind her to where Angela and Jessica were in the car. "If that's okay?"

"Of course, of course," Billy said. "Jacob just woke up, but I'm sure he'd love to see you. Tell your friends to come in while you wait."

Turning, Bella waved for the two girls to come to her. When they approached, she introduced them.

"Billy, this is Jessica Stanley and Angela Weber. Guys, this is Billy Black."

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Black," Angela smiled, holding out her hand.

"Nice to meet you, too. Please, call me Billy." He shook her hand, and then Jessica's.

"Hey, Dad, who-" Jacob skidded to a stop as he spotted the three girls standing in his kitchen. He gaped, face flushing as their eyes all locked on his naked chest.

"Jacob." Billy smirked. "We have guests. Would it kill you to make yourself decent?"

Jacob spun on his heels and disappeared into his room, the girls laughing at his retreating figure. He reappeared seconds letter, fully dressed, scowling. "I would've been decent if you told me there were girls here."

"Jacob, these are my friends Angela and Jessica. Sorry for the short notice, but I was wondering if you wanted to hang out with us today? As long as you're not busy."

Jacob looked at his dad.

"You three aren't planning on corrupting him, are you?" Billy questioned.

"Dad!" Jacob cried.

Billy laughed.

"Maybe just a little corruption." Bella grinned. "Maybe it'll do him some good to hang out with us."

"You're probably right," Billy mused. "He needs to settle down soon so he can give me grandchildren."

"Oh, my God." Jacob moaned, flushing as the girls giggled. "Please, stop embarrassing me."

Billy rolled his eyes and began to head towards the living room. "Have fun with the girls, Jacob. Be a gentlemen and invite these nice girls to the bonfire tonight. And make sure you eat before you head out."

* * *

"Your dad is nice," Angela told Jacob as they walked along the beach, Jessica chasing Bella through the sand. "It was nice of him to invite us to the bonfire. I know Jessica and I are outsiders."

"He's just happy that Bella's getting better," Jacob said. "We were all really worried about her relationships with the Cullens, especially since she never seemed to hang out with anyone else. He's happy that she has other friends. You guys seem like good people."

"Thank you!" Angela beamed at him, and Jacob blushed. "I've never been to a bonfire, before, but I'm sure it'll be fun."

In the distance, Bella shrieked as Jessica tackled her, face scrunching up in a grimace as sand got in her mouth. The two girls wrestled on the ground, laughing.

"You guys are good for her," Jacob remarked. "I don't think I've ever seen Bella this alive."

"We bring out the best in each other." Angela laughed at Jessica's face as Bella managed to flip her over.

"Jake!" a voice called from behind them.

Angela turned to see two guys approaching. They were vaguely familiar to her, although Angela couldn't quite place where she'd met them before. Jacob ran to greet them, so she assumed that they were friends.

Jessica and Bella, now covered in sand, came up next to Angela.

"Hey!" Jacob called, waving them over. "These are my friends, Embry and Quil. Guys, this is Jessica and Angela."

"Hey!" the girls chorused.

"They're hanging out with me today, so don't embarrass me. _Quil_."

Quil spluttered, Embry laughing as he shoved him out the way. They all started walking again, their heels slipping and sliding in the sand. Quil quickly attached himself to Angela and Jessica, flirting up a storm with Jacob groaning at the cheesy pickup lines. Embry fell back with Bella, who was trying to brush the sand off of her jacket.

"You guys coming to the bonfire tonight?" Embry asked.

"Yeah, Billy invited us. Is everyone on the Rez coming?"

"Nah," Embry said. "Today it's just the Blacks, the Ateras, the Clearwaters, and Sam Uley and Emily."

"I know it's not my business but...is that a good idea?"

"I'm guessing you've heard about the love triangle." Embry guessed. When Bella nodded, he continued, "We won't have to worry about a fight breaking out tonight. Leah's made it very clear she won't be in the same general vicinity as Sam and Emily. And she's a Clearwater woman, so no one can make her go anywhere she doesn't want to go. She'll skip the bonfire tonight."

"That's really sad," Bella frowned. "To have to miss out like that."

"It is what it is," Embry said, and she noted that he had a bitter twinge to his voice.

"You okay?"

"I love bonfires, but it sucks that Sam is always there."

"You're having problems with him, too?" At Embry's confused face, Bella elaborated, "Jacob told me about Sam looking at him weird. Does he look at you weird, too?"

"He doesn't look at _me_ weird, but he does act weird about Jacob and Quil. With that, and the way no one questions the way he dumped Leah for her cousin... it's just really weird how much power he has around here."

"Tell me about it. Did Jacob tell you I had lunch with Sam and his friends the other day?"

"You did what?!"

"They cornered me!" Bella said, hands raised. "I went to thank him for finding me in the woods that day I went missing. Emily insisted I stay for lunch, and I was trapped there for an hour with Sam, Emily, Paul, and Jared. Sam seemed nice on the surface, but there was something about him that made me uneasy. Something about all of them, actually. Sam seems to have this...power over other people. I don't know, it's weird. But hey, don't worry about it, okay? You guys can stick close to me at the bonfire. In case you didn't know, I'm great at scaring guys away."

Embry laughed. "Tonights gonna be fun. Come on, let's catch up with the others. We can show you guys around before we have to be back to set up for tonight."


	6. Six

**SIX**

* * *

"Good morning, everyone," a woman smiled, her voice friendly and yet commanding, the whole room falling silent as she stood. "I'd like to start off by welcoming everyone to the group, whether you be old or new. Keep in mind that this group isn't just for people who have been in abusive relationships, but also for those whose relationships may be toxic and unhealthy And I know I say this every time, but I think it's important to reiterate that this is a safe space, and you can rest easy knowing that there will be no judgement here. We are here to heal, to learn, and to grow. I would also like to reiterate that there is no pressure when it comes to these sessions. If you want to speak, we will listen. If you don't want to speak, that is perfectly fine. And if you decide that you no longer want to come to these sessions, you are free to do whatever you please. I am here to help you, yes, and one way that I help you is by giving you control over your situation. Right now, you are in control. You have the power.

And I know many of you are familiar with how this support group works, but since there are a couple of new faces, I'll quickly explain it again. If you would like to share your story with the group, raise your hand and introduce yourself. Other members of the group are allowed to ask questions and converse with the main speaker, however, do be aware that bullying and snide comments are not allowed. With that, let's begin!"

A woman a few seats down from the support group leader slowly raised her hand, and the group leader nodded, smiling encouragingly.

The woman who opened her mouth to speak was incredibly familiar.

Bella, who was still in a bit of a daze after the events of last Friday night, took a second to focus on the woman's face. She hadn't seen her in years, but she was pretty sure that was Leah Clearwater. Her resemblance to her father, Harry, who Bella saw with her father often, was striking. Her hair was pulled back into a thick, long braid, which trailed all the way down her back. Bella noted that it contrasted sharply with several other women in the circle, who kept their long hair carefully framed around their faces to hide bruises.

"Hi, I'm Leah."

"Hi, Leah," the group chimed.

"Is it okay if I explain the situation really quick?"

The question was directed towards the leader of the support group. When Bella focused on the woman, she realized the woman was wearing a name tag that helpfully supplied her name, which was Ariana.

Leah continued, "Almost a year ago, my boyfriend proposed to me. I loved him so much, and I thought he loved me, so I accepted. Everything was going great until a few weeks after the engagement. That was when Sam, my fiance at the time, disappeared. He was gone for months, and he never sent me anything, not even to let me know that he was okay. I can't even describe how stressed I was. My hair was falling out, I wasn't sleeping, I couldn't eat. My grades dropped and I almost didn't make it. I'm pretty sure I was annoying all my friends and family by constantly having them call me with updates. Then, all of a sudden, he was back."

"Did you keep the engagement ring?" Bella blurted. When everyone in the circle turned to look at her, she flushed bright red and sank down into her seat. "Sorry, I swear I wasn't trying to interrupt."

"No, it's okay," Leah smiled weakly. "Yeah. In my mind, we were still engaged, and I wanted to make it work. Sam had a rough home life, you know, with his Dad being a violent drunk. I gave him the benefit of the doubt because I didn't want to give up on him, not the way everyone else did. But when he came back, it was like the love he had for me disappeared. He was vague with his responses to any questions I asked him, he wouldn't spend the night, he wouldn't even kiss me. My cousin, Emily, had come down from the other reservation to support me at the time, to help me through everything. Sam and Emily started disappearing at the same times, always absent when I was looking for them. One day..."

A tear slid down Leah's cheek, and she angrily swiped it away.

"One day, I went into my room, and I found them in bed together."

There was a collective sharp inhale from the circle.

"They gave so many excuses, and I refused to hear any of it. When Sam asked for his ring back so he could propose to Emily, I swear on everything holy, I was prepared to go to jail for murder. I imagined running him over with my car, I was so pissed! My parents took Sam and Emily's side. Before I could even get my side of the story out, Emily went and gave her sob story, about how it wasn't Sam's fault and that you can't help who you fall in love with. So now I'm the black sheep in my own home, and everyone thinks the sun shines out of Emily's ass."

"So why are you here?" Ariana prompted. "What drove you to come to this support group?"

"This entire thing happened months ago, and I've been doing my best to move on. I've been trying to get back out there, in the dating scene. I can't date on the reservation because Emily has convinced everyone that I'm a bitter harpy, so I've been trying to go on dates with guys from Forks, Seattle, you know. Sam won't let me."

"I'm sorry, he won't _let_ you?" a girl with bright purple hair scrunched her nose up.

"Sam... I don't know how deep is influence is in the community, but he always seems to know when guys talk to me. My dates stand me up, or they start ignoring me, as if they're scared. Sometimes, I see his friends, Paul and Jared, watching me, as if they're giving him reports on me. And he keeps trying to guilt me into forgiving Emily, and agreeing to be the maid of honor at their wedding."

"What guilt would you have?" another girl asked.

"A couple of days after Sam proposed to Emily, Emily got attacked by a bear. It got her pretty good, and I guess Sam thinks that I'll feel guilty over her scars, which I had nothing to do with, and forgive them." Leah shifted in her seat. "When I say it out loud, it sounds really fucking dumb. I can't believe how dramatic I'm being."

"How are you being dramatic?" Ariana asked patiently. "What makes you think that your reactions are not valid?"

"Because Sam didn't hit me!" Leah snapped. "There are so many people in the world who have it way worse, and here I am, whining because my ex is clingy."

"There is no competition when it comes to trauma, Leah. Just because Sam did not physically abuse you does not make what you went through invalid. What Sam is doing fits the definition of several types of abusive tactics. Sam is controlling who you see, he's making you feel as if you're crazy for wanting to move on with your life, and you said that he has power in the community that makes it less likely for people to speak out against him. Sam may not have hit you, but the emotional and psychological distress that you are under are valid, too. Those scars are just as important as the physical ones."

That last sentence seemed to resonate with many of the girls in the circle, as they hugged themselves just a bit tighter. A tear slid down Leah's cheek, and Bella was close to tears herself. She'd had similar thoughts herself about her relationship with Edward.

Edward had never hit her, but he did make her feel weak, mentally and emotionally, especially with the way that he left. Treating her like her emotional and mental processes were inferior to his made her cheeks burn and her stomach twist in humiliation.

"It's just so hard," Leah whispered. "It's like I'm the villain in my own story. Every night I cry myself to sleep because everyone who I thought loved me actually hates me. Do you know what the people on the reservation say about me? They say that I'll be alone forever, because if Sam didn't want me, then no one will."

"That's not true," the girl next to Leah says, her voice starting off timid, but growing stronger as she continued. "That's what shitty people do, that's what they want you to think. My mom used to do the same thing. She would tell me that I was ugly and no one want ever love me, so that's why I had to stay with her forever. People do those things so we are trapped, so we feel like we have no where else to go. That's what Sam wants, too. He wants to have you and Emily because, in his mind, if he has you, then he gets away with what he's done. He gets to have his cake and eat it, too."

"Brianna is right," Ariana said. "I know you think that only physical abuse is worth mentioning, but that's not true. All types of abuse have a negative effect on a person. By making you feel like this, Sam is mentally and emotionally abusing you. I know it's hard to come to terms with." She sits back in her chair and gives a soft smile. "I know you think I'm all talk, but you know how I know these things? A few years ago, I was where you are right now. I used to think that I had no where to go, no one to support me. I stayed with my abusive boyfriend because he had me convinced that there was no one else in the world that would tolerate me the way he did. Getting away from him, Leah? That was the greatest thing to ever happen to me. I can't even begin to describe how much happier I am. I know my self worth. I know who I am. Will I ever forget what happened to me? No. But I can move on. We can all move on."

The rest of the session continued in similar fashion, some of the other girls choosing to share their stories and get advice from their fellow peers and Ariana. At the end of the session, before Ariana released them for the day, she asked everyone to say something about themselves, or about their life, that they were happy about. Something that made the days just a bit easier.

"My little brother," Leah smiled. "He's always on my side. I can always count on him, and that makes the pain not as bad."

"My kitten, Lily."

"My internship," Brianna said. "I'm getting paid to get experience with coding and animation. Best thing to ever happen to me."

Around the circle they went, and when it got to Bella, she said, "My relationship with my dad."

Ariana smiled and stood.

"That's it for today, ladies. Feel free to have some of the refreshments in the corner. If you want to stick around and talk to me, I'll be here for another hour. And if any of you need anything, anything at all, please, don't hesitate to call me. Have a wonderful day!"

Bella smiled at a few of the other girls in the room as she slipped into the hallway, having to jog to catch up to Leah.

"Hey, wait up!"

"Swan," Leah said warningly, coming to an abrupt halt.

"I just wanted to say hi," Bella said, hands up. "And I'm not gonna tell anyone you were here, you don't have to worry. I just wanted to see how you were doing. I know we haven't spoken in years, and you don't have to tell me anything, but...it's just nice to see a familiar face."

"Oh...," Leah murmured. "Same here. And I appreciate you keeping this between us."

"Did you maybe want to get lunch in Port Angeles at the Chestnut Cottage? My treat? We can catch up."

Leah smiled. "Sure, I'll follow you in my car."

* * *

Paul scratched at his leg, frowning at the jeans he had on. Ever since phasing, the less clothing he had on, the better. His body ran so hot now that anything more restricting than shorts set him on edge. While he preferred shorts, though, he couldn't exactly take a girl out on a date only half dressed.

Mia sat across from him, chattering happily. He'd asked her out the week prior, to a movie and dinner, and Sam had been generous enough to let him off patrol for a bit, although it did come with a warning. Sam hadn't been happy about him dating, as he was a firm believer in imprinting, but that wasn't his only concern; Sam was also concerned that Paul wouldn't be able to control himself if things got physical. Paul was determined to prove him wrong.

"Do you know when you'll be able to come back to school?" Mia smiled at him. "It's not the same without you there!"

Paul winced. He doubted he'd ever go back. He didn't complete his senior year, having to leave before it was even halfway through in order to get his phasing under control. And now that he was out of school, he found it difficult to event think about going back. How could he ever return to a mundane life of going to class after spending months hunting and killing vampires?

"I don't know yet," Paul said. "I'll most likely have to repeat my senior year, but I could maybe graduate early if I put my mind to it. You graduate in the spring, don't you? Aren't you going to Stanford?"

"Hopefully," Mia murmured, pleased that he remembered her top choice school that she'd applied to. "I don't know if I got in yet, but fingers crossed."

"Someone as smart as you, you probably got a scholarship, too."

Mia blushed. She opened her mouth, but whatever she said went in one ear and out the other as Paul's attention was diverted to the two people that had just walked in through the door of the restaurant.

"Table for two, please," Leah Clearwater said to the hostess, and she and Bella were lead to a table not too far from where Paul and Mia were sitting. Fortunately for Paul, the two girls didn't notice him, too busy talking to the waitress and ordering their drinks

Paul attempted to focus back on Mia, who was in the middle of telling him the latest high school drama that he was missing out on, but was drawn into Leah's conversation with the police chief's daughter.

"You had lunch with Sam and Emily?!"

"Paul and Jared, too," Bella grimaced. "It was so awkward. I was praying for the ground to open up and swallow me whole."

"How was it? Other than awkward?"

"Intense. I went there to say thanks to Sam for looking for me in the woods, you know, that night I got lost? Well, I had brought over brownies, and the first person I meet wasn't even Sam, it was _Paul_. And he called me a _paleface_!"

The conversation halted when the waitress came back with their drinks, two glasses of water with lemon, and took their order. Bella ordered the chicken club, and Leah got the Philly cheesesteak.

"Paul has always been a bit of a wild card. He's got anger issues, got them from his dad apparently."

"If Sam hadn't been there, I'm, like, ninety nine percent sure that Paul would've murdered me. Anyways, Sam was nice enough, I guess. I didn't really start getting any weird vibes from him until he started interrogating me about the Cullens. Emily showed up a bit after and insisted I stay for lunch. The second I was free to go, I high tailed it out of there."

"Why did Sam want to know about the Cullens?"

"He wanted to know if they ever planned on coming back to Forks. How I would know that, I have no idea. The Cullens cut off contact with me out of the blue and then disappeared off the face of the Earth. Clearly, I didn't mean as much to them as I thought I did."

The last part was said in a low, hushed voice, Bella's face downcast.

Leah, attempting to cheer her up, said, "You aren't missing out on much, I'm sure. Edward wasn't even that good looking."

Bella snorted, choking on her water. "Leah!"

"What? It's true! The only Cullen I could understand the ladies going crazy for is Dr. Cullen."

"Dr. Cullen?!"

"It's the quiet ones you gotta watch out for; they're always the kinkiest."

"Oh, my god!" Bella giggles hysterically into her hands. She inhales sharply to hold the noise back at the waitress appears with their food. The second she leaves, Bella collapses into her arms once again.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you never thought waxed poetic about Dr. Cullen. Look me in the eye and swear it."

"You know I can't do that," Bella mumbled into her hands. She very vividly remembered staring at Carlisle in a daze when he was stitching her up after her birthday party.

"Paul?" Mia's soft voice rips his focus away from Leah and Bella. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, sorry," Paul said.

"It's okay," Mia said. "Listen, I had fun today. I'm sorry to cut out date short, but my mom wants me to get home."

"It's not a problem," Paul assures her, leaning over the table to kiss her on the cheek. "I'm going to pick up the bill, you can go ahead and head out."

"Are you sure? I can give you a ride back if you need one."

"I'm sure, I have to run some errands anyways. I'll see you later?"

They say their goodbyes, and Mia leaves, leaving Paul free to focus back in on Leah and Bella.

"I was surprised to see you, too," Leah said, swirling her straw in her cup with one hand, and dipping a fry into a pool of honey mustard with the other. "I...I wasn't aware that your relationship with Edward was anything other than perfect. Dr. Cullen seemed to flawless that I assumed the rest of the family would be the same."

"My relationship with Edward was...complicated. I didn't talk about it as the session because I was too nervous, but he was much like Sam was. Edward controlled a lot of aspects of my life, too. I sacrificed a lot because I wanted him to like me. I thought that I was special to have someone like Edward on my arm. I've been realizing that maybe having a boyfriend isn't all its cracked up to be."

"Celibacy is the move," Leah agreed. "Sam won't let me date anyone else, so I guess I'll spend the rest of my life as a lonely cat lady."

"If he keeps controlling your love life, I'll send a plate of tainted brownies his way."

"Jacob told me you offered to do the same for him. Since I skip out on the bonfires, now, he makes sure to keep me up to date about the Rez gossip."

Bella grinned. "Yeah, Jake was telling me about the weird looks Sam has been giving him. Poisoning a batch of brownies was my way of contributing to his peace of mind. He turned me down though." Bella paused to sip at her water. "Listen, I know it's been a while since we hung out, this time aside, so how about I introduce you to my friends some time this week? Us girls gotta stick together."

"Really?" the proposal seemed to throw Leah off balance. "You'd want me to hang out with you guys? I wouldn't be in the way?"

Paul's stomach twisted uncomfortably as he realized that Leah's lack of a social life was a direct consequence of Emily and Sam's actions, which made Leah an outcast in her own community. Now that he thought about it, it was strange that La Push so quickly welcomed Emily, who was an outsider, and shunned Leah.

He felt nauseous, knowing that, on a few occasions, he'd dutifully reported to Sam about any men he'd seen talking to Leah. He hadn't thought much about it. Logically, he knew that Sam was trying to control Leah while fucking her cousin, but he hadn't really cared. It hadn't involved him, and he saw no reason to be upset about it. Now, though, he felt like shit. Leah was trying to move on with her life, and Sam, who preached about imprinting, was obviously not as happy with his match as he claimed to be if the way he kept trying to keep Leah isolated was any indication.

"Of course," Bella said.

Paul quickly waves his waiter over and pays the bill, leaving a tip stuffed under his glass of soda.

He slips out of the restaurant before the two girls can see him, and down the street, hoping the long walk home would clear his head.


	7. Seven

**SEVEN**

* * *

"I keep dreaming about him leaving me in the woods," Bella admitted, twirling her straw. She watched the shrinking ice cubs swirl around her glass of root beer. "Keep thinking about what he said to me."

"Maybe it's a blessing in disguise," Jessica said. "This way, you won't forget what he did to you. And if he ever comes back, you can tear him a new asshole."

Leah and Angela laughed.

The four girls were a diner in Seattle, Bella having introduced Leah to the other two. Leah had been timid at first, and Bella couldn't blame her. From what she'd gathered, Leah was a social outcast on the reservation now. Bella couldn't imagine being how it felt to have people who you thought loved you take someone else's side.

True to her word, Bella hadn't mentioned Leah's presence at the meeting last week, although she was tempted to bring it up with her dad. Bella would never divulge someone else's personal information, but she was worried about the influence that Sam had on the reservation. She hadn't thought there was anything too strange about him when they'd met, but after finding out that he was controlling Leah's social interactions with others, she was a lot more wary.

Bella was hesitant to make any concrete assumptions about Sam, seeing as how the only information she had about his questionable behavior came from Jacob and Leah. Without seeing it for herself, it felt wrong to make accusations. She believed Jacob and Leah, but didn't want to get her father involved without any actual proof besides heresy.

"Maybe all of us being single is for a reason," Angela said. "Maybe we're meant to make this year about ourselves."

"I can definitely make this year about me." Jessica grinned with a maniacal look in her eye.

She opened her mouth to continue, but paused when the waiter came back with a large, round tray of food. Bella's mouth watered at the sight of her bacon burger and fries. Angela had ordered chicken tenders, as had Leah, and Jess had gotten the breakfast platter. Bella smiled down at her plate briefly, once again struck with the realization that her life here was so different than her life in Phoenix. She'd never gotten the chance to go out wit friends, and she had trained herself to eat very little since she was young to survive those weekends when her mother would leave her alone.

"Bella?"

She jerked out of her thoughts, flushing. "Yeah? Sorry."

"It's okay," Angela assured her. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Bella said quickly. "I was just thinking about how in Phoenix I never really went out with friends like this. I'm actually surprised you guys haven't gotten sick of me yet."

"You didn't have many friends in Phoenix?" Leah asked, drowning the tip of her chicken tender into honey mustard.

"I didn't really have the time." Bella said. "Also, don't know if you've noticed, but I'm really awkward."

"Bella spent most of her first day at Forks High in silence," Jessica supplied, stuffing a forkful of pancakes in her mouth, syrup getting caught in the corner of her lips. "It was like talking to a brick wall."

"She wasn't that bad!" Angela laughed. "She smiled a few times."

Bella buried her face in her hands in mortification, cheeks burning. It was no secret that her social skills needed work, and although she was doing much better now, it was still kind of embarrassing to remember how things used to be.

"She seems fine to me," Leah smiled, nudging Bella's knee under the table with her own. "Besides, the quiet people are the best because they always know all the gossip. Speaking of gossip, tell me, what's the latest at Forks High? La Push drama isn't nearly as fun."

* * *

Angela stared at herself in the mirror.

For the first time in a long time, she didn't hate what she saw. Being in the closet had made her internalize a lot of things, to the point where even seeing her reflection made her sad. Now that she was out to her two best friends, she felt so much better. Knowing that she could always go to Bella or Jessica had eased the pressure in her chest, and she was once again able to sleep without facing the fitful hours of tossing and turning.

The only people who she was worried about was her parents.

Angela's life was complicated. She went to church not necessarily because she wanted to, but because it was expected of her. The church and the connecting faith was very important to her mother and father, and Angela would never begrudge someone for finding comfort and peace in religion. However, it was difficult to share those feelings when people like her father used that same religion to justify prejudice against those that were different. Angela could never say that, though, not to her father's face.

She was Angela Weber, and Angela Weber was expected to be seen and not heard, be a second mother to her younger brothers, maintain straight As, and be heterosexual. It didn't matter that she was an individual human being separate from the idea of her that her parents had in their head.

Angela raised a hand to her cheek, touching the soft skin. She imagined what it would be like to meet the love of her life, another soft hand wrapped around hers. Perhaps she'd wear glasses, just as Angela did. Once upon a time, she was convinced that she could accept Ben as the love of her life, no matter how much it made her stomach turn.

Hope filled Angela's chest. Her lips quirked up into a smile.

If was able to accept herself, _love_ herself, for who she was, and her friends were as well, then why couldn't the same apply for her family? Her parents loved her. If she could simply explain, they'd understand! They'd take the time to improve, to accept, to believe. She'd open her heart to them, and they would realize that all the things they believed about homosexuals to be false.

Filled with a renewed sense of purpose, Angela brushed her hair back from her face and left her room, walking down the steps carefully to avoid waking her brothers from their nap.

The light from the kitchen could be seen from the bottom of the stairs. Angela's socked feet slid along the carpet, her heart pounding as she prepared to reveal her secret yet again.

Angela was a mere foot from the entrance of the kitchen when she began to hear her parents' voices.

"Any news about James?" her mother asked. Angela crept closer, peering around the corner. Something about the tone of her mother's voice made her hesitate.

"He's doing well at camp," came her father's reply, a smile on his face as he flicked through the newspaper at the kitchen table. Her mother refilled his mug of coffee before returning to the dishes.

"That's good. I know Jane and Brandon were worried that it was too late."

"It's never too late," her father gently reminded her. "He, like many others, are just confused. Without the proper guidance and dedication of their parents, people like James are unable to resist the Devil's temptation. It is up to us to put them back on the right path. James may not realize it now, but the conversion therapy is necessary. It's the only way he can once again become a man of God and truly bring honor to his family. As long as the therapy is successful, the church will welcome him back with open arms."

Angela inhaled sharply, a tear sliding down her cheek as she realized what had happened.

James was a boy who went to her church. He didn't live in Forks, but in a neighboring town, Beaver. He and his family were regular attendees, or, at least, they used to be. James had been absent for several months now, only his mother and father making appearances. When asked, they'd said that James had to be sent away to a medical facility to treat a deadly disease. Angela, like many others, had thought nothing of it. It was rare for people in small town Forks to get diseases so bad they needed to be sent elsewhere, but not uncommon; it had to happen to someone. Now, though, Angela understood that that story was a very clever lie.

In the minds of Jane and Brandon Xavier, James _did_ have a deadly disease. To them, being homosexual was a sickness, and so the "medical facility" that they'd sent him to was necessary to prevent their family from being ostracized by their peers.

At the sound of her gasp, Angela's parents turned to look at her, partially hidden behind the wall. She hastily wiped her face.

"Angela!" her father smiled, folding his newspaper and putting it down on the table. "What are you doing standing in the dark hallway?"

Angela stared into her father's face, and then glanced at her mother.

"I just came down to see if Mom needed help getting dinner ready," the lie slipped easily from her lips, and her father smiled approvingly, always pleased to see his daughter helping out around the house.

Angela's mother waved her other and began to instruct her on preparing the chicken. Angela went through the motions, her face betraying nothing. But on the inside? Angela had never been in so much pain.

How could she have been so stupid? Why would she ever think that she would be welcome here?

Angela thought about James, and wondered if he'd ever recover from the horrors that his parents had subjected him to. She thought about how easily she could have been in James place, and merely imagining it made her eyes water.

She understood, now, that she could never trust her parents with this part of herself.

Until she could leave, until she was safe, she was Angela Weber. She was the pastor's daughter, a straight A student, a caretaker, and, most importantly, straight.

Nothing more.

Nothing less.

* * *

Days later, Leah and Bella are in Bella's room. Ever since their lunch, Leah's been happier, a lightness about her that wasn't there before. Being able to carry a conversation with people that weren't taking sides in the Sam-Emily-Leah love triangle was refreshing, and Leah was more than happy to spend her days with Bella, when she wasn't with Seth and Jake.

Leah's fondly telling Bella stories about Seth, and Bella wonders what her life would have been like if she'd had a younger sibling.

"You love him a lot," Bella observed, playing with a loose thread at the bottom of her dark blue sweater. "It's weird; back in Phoenix, I never really met anyone that actually liked their siblings."

"That's due to bad parenting," Leah said, waving her hand in the air. "A lot of parents, intentionally or unintentionally, turn their children against each other and make everything a competition. And some parents make the older siblings a third parent to their siblings, which builds resentment. Not my parents, though. Seth was never forced on me, and they never neglected me for him. I love Seth a lot. Aside from you and Jake, he's been my best friend through all of this. I can always count on him to have my back."

"I used to wonder if I'd ever had a sibling." Bella admits, frowning. "Honestly, I used to panic that my mom's reckless behavior would end up with her constantly pregnant, what with the way that she went through boyfriends. Now that I think about it, I'm glad that never happened. I wouldn't have been able to handle parenting two people."

"You don't talk about her much," Leah says quietly. "And when you do, you never sound happy."

Bella's silent for a moment. As she slowly came out of her shell, she found herself more and more irritated with how Renee had impacted her life. So much of her life had been her staying silent and making excuses for her mother's neglect, and she was slowly accepting that she didn't have to do that anymore.

"Renee...sometimes I don't even have the words to describe her. Sometimes, she can be really sweet. And others, most of the time, actually, she's so wrapped up in her own little world that no one else exists. She didn't want to be a parent, I don't think, but she wanted my dad to have me even less."

Leah's arms wrapped around Bella's shoulders, and Bella inhaled deeply, taking in the warmth that Leah was willingly sharing. She hadn't admitted that to anyone, and it felt good to get that off her chest. Renee didn't like being a mother, but what she liked even less was losing. And it worked out, in the end, in that she was able to get away with the bare minimum while Bella was the adult.

Leah pulled back, looking Bella in her eyes. "My mom loves you, you know. She'd gladly take you in. Charlie, too."

Bella smiled, touched that Leah was offering her family despite her own current problems with them. "She just wants Charlie and Harry in the same place so she can bully them into eating better."

"Or maybe she wants my dad to see what a good influence you are on Charlie," Leah giggled. "Your old man is a hell of a lot more active than mine is. How'd you manage that, by the way? My dad acts like it's the end of the world when my mom tells him to stop eating fried fish."

"It's a joint effort. I wanted to be more active, and I wanted my dad to live past fifty, and after the year I've had, he's been very open to change."

Leah sighed, moving to lay down on the bedroom floor, only to sit right back up, a frown on her face.

"What's wrong?" Bella asked.

"This board is sticking up," Leah said, poking at it with her finger. "Did you yank a nail out or something?"

Bella's heart started to race for reasons unknown, moving Leah's hand out of the way to grip the edges of the board and pull it up.

Under the floorboard is every single item she'd ever received from the Cullen's. The CD. The plane tickets. The pictures. Everything.

Someone's talking, Bella was sure, but the words weren't being processed. All she heard was white noise as she stared down at the items that Edward had no doubt stuffed under her floors. Bella didn't know what to think, didn't know what to do. Why had he hidden them instead of destroying them? Did he still love her? Was he coming back? Did he mean for -

"Bella!"

Bella looked at Leah, and whatever Leah saw made her pull Bella away from the open section of the floor.

"Bella, are you okay? How'd that stuff get down there?"

Bella wanted to scream, wanted to take that CD and chuck it out the window, but also wanted to play it on repeat. She wanted to take those plane tickets and go anywhere and nowhere. Wanted to smooth out the crumpled photos.

"I'm fine," is what Bella said instead. "I had forgotten I put them down there. It surprised me, is all."

Leah looked unsure, but didn't push.

"Hey, tell me more about the stuff you do with your dad. I need some pointers."

"It'll be better if I showed you," Bella says. The girls prepare to go downstairs and out into the backyard. As Leah's starting down the hallway, Bella places the board back into its spot and presses it down. Out of sight, out of mind.

For now.

* * *

"I'd better head home," Leah sighed, leaning against the hood of her car.

She and Bella had been out back for a while, goofing off as Bella talked about the exercises she'd picked up over the weeks. Leah didn't want to go home. She didn't want to see anyone else looking at her with pity or mumbling under their breath about her failed relationship. And she absolutely did not want to listen to her dad try to make excuses for Sam. She loved the old man, but God, was he pushing it.

"I'm glad you came over today," Bella smiled. "And stayed for dinner. Charlie loves you more than me, I swear."

"Well, who wouldn't?"

They both laugh.

"Seriously, though, thanks for always wanting to hang out. I felt bad always hanging out with Jacob because then he doesn't see Embry and Quil as often."

"You and Jacob hang out a lot?" Leah said coolly.

"Yeah," Bella said slowly. "Mostly just working on his car. I mean, I don't work on the car, but he lets me watch."

Leah's face looked a little dark, and Bella hesitantly asked, "Did I...do something? I...I thought we had a good day today."

"It's nothing," Leah snapped. "I just didn't realize that you and Jake were so close."

Bella stared at Leah for a moment before a smile slowly spread across her face. "Leah Clearwater, are you jealous?"

 _"What?!"_ came the shrieked reply, followed by reddening cheeks. "Why would you think that?"

"Oh, my God," Bella cackled. "You _are_! You are _so_ crushing on Jake. That's so cute."

"Swan, you tell anyone, and you're dead," Leah hissed, jabbing a fingernail into Bella's chest. "I mean it!"

"I won't tell anyone!" Bella swore, raising her right hand. "And you don't have to worry about me, I'm not after Jake."

"He talks about you all the time. Like, _all_ the time. You two seriously aren't together?"

"We're like siblings," Bella said reassuringly. "He probably talks about me a lot because he's nervous."

"Does he...is he nervous because he likes me?" Leah whispered, hopeful.

"Ask him yourself." Bella smirked, pushing Leah towards the driver's seat. "Get a move on and go get your man. Time's a wasting!"

* * *

After Leah left, Bella went to bed. With her father asleep and Leah back in La Push, her thoughts very easily strayed back to the uneven floorboard just a few feet away. Bella dared not to even look in its direction, instead staring at the ceiling so hard she was surprised that it didn't catch fire.

She had so many questions and too little answers. When Edward had left, he'd torn her apart. The wound to her heart had only worsened when she'd come home, only to realize that the reminders of him and his family were gone.

Bella didn't know what to think. Edward had made it clear that he didn't want her, and yet had left a reminder of his family in reach. There was no way that he could have believed that she'd never stumble across the uneven floorboard. And yet, there was no reason for him to not have believed that. In all honesty, if Leah hadn't laid down in the spot she laid down in, Bella doubts that she ever would have thought to lift that uneven board up.

 _I was doing so good_ , Bella thought. Thoughts of the Cullens had become few and far between. It still hurt, but it no longer felt like she had a hole in her chest. Now, though, she was torn open anew, no longer able to ignore the Cullens' presence in her life, not with the physical remnants of them just a few feet away.

Bella fell into a fitful sleep, her nightmares later tearing Charlie from his own slumber.

* * *

That weekend, Charlie and Bella head down to La Push. Charlie goes with Billy to watch the game, and Bella follows Jacob out to the garage, pulling her jacket tighter around her torso, not noticing Charlie's worried glance in her direction.

Bella enters then garage and immediately goes to a nearby stool, a seat that Jacob had pulled up just for her many weeks prior.

"It looks great, Jake," Bella says, nodding towards the almost finished Rabbit.

"Thanks!" Jacob says with a smile, although it quickly fades. "You alright?"

"I'm fine," Bella responds quickly, feeling anything but.

Jacob looks her over, noting the dark circles under Bella's eyes, the limpness of her hair. She looks like she's had a rough couple of days. He has no idea what could've happened, but he suggests, "When the Rabbit's done, we can go for a ride. You can get the experience first," to cheer her up.

"Maybe Leah's the one you should take out first," Bella smirks, managing to look smug despite the haggard look to her. Jacob flushed and quickly turned away, fiddling with a wrench.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, come on! You have to know that Leah likes you! She'll be upset if she isn't the first one to go for a ride in the Rabbit. Aren't things going good with you two?"

"They're good, I guess," Jacob signs, spinning back around on his stool to face her, tossing the wrench into the toolbox. The sound of metal hitting metal briefly drowned out the faint sound of Charlie and Billy shouting at the TV. "We watch movies, go for walks, that kind of stuff. Seth usually comes with us. She's always on edge, though, always looking over her shoulder."

Bella bit her lip, glancing away. Leah was no doubt making sure that Sam wasn't lurking around, ready to scare Jake away. Sam couldn't scare Seth away, as Bella doubted that anything could make Seth abandon his sister, but Jacob was already wary of Sam. Any more of Sam's unnerving attention, and Jacob might actually run for the hills.

"I'm sure it's nothing," Bella assured him. "She just out of a relationship, remember? She's probably just a bit nervous about the town gossip, since the whole Sam-Emily-Leah triangle is still a hot topic."

"That's true," Jacob mused, rubbing his chin. "Do you think she'd be willing to go out with me if I asked?"

Bella smiles, nudging Jake's foot with her own. "Why don't you ask her and find out?"

* * *

"So I was thinking this Friday we can go to the movies," Bella panted, slowing her jog down to a brisk walk. Around them, the lush green forest stretched on for miles. Part of her and Charlie's efforts to spend more time together included getting into shape as a team. And after spending Friday night inhaling pizza with Billy and Jacob, and Saturday eating food at the diner, they needed to burn off the calories. "It's been a while since we've been out."

"Actually," Charlie mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. He stops walking, and Bella follows him, frowning, as she leaned down to massage away the tightness in her calves. "I...I have a date Friday night. But I can cancel if you want!"

 _"You have a date?!"_ Bella shrieks, jerking upright so fast she felt a bit dizzy. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?! We have to plan your outfit! We need to work on your small talk! What's her name? What does she do? Where are you taking her?"

"Woah, Bells, slow down!"

"We might have to go shopping," Bella continued, spinning on her heel in the direction of the house and striding off, Charlie running to keep up with her. "Get you a nice shirt, something that isn't faded."

"Bella, relax," Charlie urged. "It's just a date. Just dinner and a movie."

"I'm so excited for you! I'm glad that you're getting out there, Dad. You never did tell me what her name was."

"Olivia Johnson," Charlie blushed. "She's a dentist out in Port Angeles, but she lives on the outskirts of Forks."

"How'd you two even meet?"

"I ran into her when I was picking up some things in Port Angeles," Charlie mumbled, cheeks still red. "I was trying to build up the courage to go talk to her when she came up to me. I managed to get myself together enough to ask her out. And here we are."

Bella smiled. Her dad had a dopey look on his face, and she couldn't recall ever seeing him like this. The two of them were very similar; they had difficulty expressing themselves and preferred to sit in silence. It was strange, but nice, to see him so excited about his date. Bella prayed it went well, afraid that a bad experience would drive her father even further into the world of an eternal bachelor.

"That's amazing, Dad." Bella said. "But don't think you're getting out of shopping. You have to look nice for your date."

"I can dress nice!" he protested.

"Mhm," Bella side eyed him before picking up the pace, jogging to dodge the swipe that came her way.

Charlie took off after her, the two of them breathless from their laughter as they ran home.

* * *

Bella waited about an hour after her father went to sleep to finally get out of bed. Avoiding the creaky spots in the floorboards, Bella locked her door. Going back to her bed, she sat down, crossed her legs, and placed her hands on her knees, palms down.

She closed her eyes, and tried to envision her shield.

It had first manifested that night in the alley, her physical shield at least. Her mental shield had apparently been present for quite some time. The main focus of tonight was to prove that she could expand her shield, the physical one at least. She didn't want to strain herself by trying to force progress on both at the same time.

She took a deep breath, and reached within.

Nothing, except...thoughts of the items stuffed under her floor.

Several days worth of poor sleeping and anxiety reached a crescendo in the worst way possible, filling Bella was an indescribable amount of rage. She was so angry, couldn't recall ever being so angry. She was getting over him, over _them_. She was _healing_ , finally moving on with her life and building something that didn't revolve around her undead ex-boyfriend and his family. But of course it couldn't be that easy.

Of _course_ Edward stuffed those things under her floor. After all, how else would he continue to have a hold over her? How would she ever be able to move on if Edward continued to dominate her life, her every thought? And wasn't that a bitch? Edward had promised, _promised_ , that he'd leave and that she'd forget about him, and yet he left the CD, pictures, and tickets in the _worst_ possible place, as if she would never, ever see that broken floorboard.

Did Edward think she was stupid? Did he think her human mind so weak, that she'd never eventually notice what he'd done? What's even worse, is that she couldn't even walk on a straight, flat surface without tripping. Obviously, she'd gotten better over the weeks as she and Charlie began to be active, but Edward didn't know that. For all he knew, she was the same, danger magnet he had known before. The floorboard, with the nail yanked out of him, would not have stayed down forever. Eventually, it would continue to rise as she continuously walked and stepped on it. She could have tripped and cracked her head open on the edge of her desk on that floorboard, or her dad could have tripped. Either way, there was simply no possible way that his actions would go unnoticed.

Bella was pissed.

So pissed, that something inside of her snapped.

An unseen forced ripped out of her, and as Bella screamed, vocalizing her rage, several things happened at the same time. Her bedroom window shattered, as did her floor length mirror, and her desk slammed into the opposite wall, majority of the contents crashing to the floor. Her bedroom door and closet door cracked so hard that stray pieces of wood littered the floor.

Heavy footsteps thundered her way, and her bedroom door flew open, the top part of it snapping and falling off. Her father stood in the doorway, gun in hand, gaping at the damage in her room.

Bella stared back, her own face reflecting the same shock. Her mind raced along with her heart, trying desperately to come up with a believable reason for her room to look like it's been hit by an earthquake. Charlie spluttered, lowering the gun as he stepped further in the room, trying to wrap his mind around the ruined room, and Bella sitting, unharmed, on her bed. Their eyes met once again, and Bella knew she had run out of time to lie her way out of this.

 _Shit_.


	8. Eight

**EIGHT**

* * *

Charlie and Bella stared at each other in silence.

Glass littered the floor, and her bedroom door hung limply from the hinges, the top half of the door laying in the threshold. The cool air from outside filtered in through the shattered window, and the purple curtains floated in the air.

Bella didn't know what to say, didn't know what she _could_ say. There was no way she could explain the current state of her room, at least not in a way that her father would believe.

"Bella?" Charlie said softly, eyes wide. The gun he'd had when he barged into the room hung limply at his side, brushing against his red and black pajama bottoms.

Bella swallowed, untwisting herself from her crosslegged position shakily. "Yeah?"

"What," Charlie stepped even further into the room, only to jerk to a stop as his foot came into contact with glass, the pieces nearly shattering under his feet. "What _happened_? Are you okay?"

No, she wasn't okay.

Just moments before, she had been filled with the rage, furious in her discovery of the items that Edward had stuffed under her floor. She was so angry with him, but also felt so abandoned, so lonely. She had an entire chunk of her life that she could never, ever share with anyone. She'd never be able to truly vent or let go of the Cullens, and even now, as her father stared at her waiting for an answer, she couldn't help but wonder if Edward was malicious enough to have purposefully put her in a situation where she simply couldn't get over him, because she was bound by the vampire laws to never divulge what she'd learned over the past year.

"Bella?"

Bella started, and muttered, "I, um, there was an...earthquake?" Her voice trailed off pathetically.

"Are you serious right now? Are you seriously trying to convince me that an earthquake hit Forks, and the only room in the house to be affected was yours?"

Bella said nothing.

"Bella," Charlie pleaded, setting his gun down on the ruined desk and reaching for her. Bella let herself get pulled into his arms, and realized that her entire body was shaking. "Bella, talk to me. We agreed to be honest with each other, remember? You know you can tell me anything."

God, she wanted to. But how could she? Telling him about what she had just done would require a deeper explanation, one that would give details about the supernatural world. She was already living on the edge by knowing about the existence of vampires and still being human. The information she'd received from Edward about the Volturi had made it clear that they didn't tolerate humans knowing their secret, and it was one thing for her to be condemned to death. But her father? She couldn't do that to him.

And yet...what else could she do? He'd never let tonight's incident go. Not only was he her father, but he was the goddamn chief of police! He didn't get there by being stupid; eventually, he'd connect the dots.

Bella began to cry. She wanted to tell him so badly, feeling so incredibly alone with the revelation of her powers. She didn't know what was happening to her, why it was happening, or how it was happening. All she knew was that she was dangerous, destructive, and _scared_.

Charlie hugged her tighter, murmuring what Bella could only assume were comforting words, her face buried in his chest as she lost herself to her thoughts. It was then, breathing in the familiar, comforting scent of her father, that she made her decision. She would tell him as much as she could, whatever she currently deemed safe, and do her best to keep him out of harms way. Perhaps she could make it on her own, but the truth was...she was tired of being alone. She'd been alone all her life, always having to struggle alone because her mother never truly cared. And she was tired. God, Bella was so tired.

"I did it," Bella whispered. "I did it."

"What?" Charlie questioned softly, gently pulling Bella's face out of his chest. He brushed her hair back from her tear stained face. "Bella, what are you talking about?"

"I did it," she repeated, louder this time. "I...I don't know how, but I...I did it."

Silence fell upon the room once again, and Bella shivered as the temperature of the room continued to drop.

"What do you mean you did it?" her father asked gently. The street light from outside cast a faint glow over her father's face.

"I, I don't know, I did it," Bella insisted, trying to make him understand.

Charlie's face softened, and he murmured, "It's okay if you're still struggling with the breakup, Bells. Obviously we're gonna have to talk about you breaking the window, and get you another outlet, but -"

 _"I DID IT!"_ Bella screamed, and the same force from earlier pulsed out of her, still dangerous but significantly less damaging than before. Her father was knocked on his back several feet away and the door finally came off the hinges, the noise it makes hitting the ground echoing throughout the house. Charlie gapes up at her from the floor, and Bella begins to cry again as she realizes what she's done.

"Bella?" Charlie whispers, slowly pushing himself up to a sitting position. His arms are littered with scratches from where he hit the glass.

"I'm sorry," Bella sobbed, burying her face in her hands. "I don't know what's happening to me!"

This wasn't going at all how she wanted it to. She wanted to tell him about her powers, about what happened with the men in Port Angeles, and instead everything was falling apart. Her head was pounding, the most intense headache she's had in a long time. Arms wrapped around her, and Bella cried until her world went black.

* * *

The world is quiet when Bella wakes.

She's warm, and she's confused, because she was sure she had shattered her window the night before, leaving her room vulnerable to the frosty air. Bella sits up slowly, pushing her hair out of her face. She's in a room, but it's not her room. It's her father's room, Bella recognizing the array of plaid shirts in the open closet to her left, as well as his uniform.

The door opens, and Bella jumps. Her father enters carrying a tray of food, a bottle of Tylenol, and a glass of water. He smiles at her as he sets it down on the beside table.

"How are you feeling?" he asks.

Bella looks at the clock, nearly being blocked by the stack of pancakes on the tray, and sees that it's ten minutes after nine.

"You're not going to school today," her father supplies before she can ask, "and I called out of work. I think you and I need a day to talk." He moves to place the tray on her lap and puts the fork in her hand. "Eat up, and I'll go first."

Bella's too tired to argue, and just cuts a piece of pancake and pops it in her mouth. She then takes two pills from the bottle and knocks them back with the water before she continues to eat.

"You passed out last night," Charlie says. "It was too cold in your room for you to sleep there, so I brought you in here. I cleaned the room up as best as I could. The door couldn't be saved, so I'll have to order you a new one. The window repair man won't be in until this afternoon, so until then, I nailed some blankets there to keep most of the cold air out. I'm ordering you a new desk, too. It wasn't too beat up, but there were some chunks missing, and I didn't want to risk you getting any splinters. Luckily, we won't have to wait long for the desk. Office Depot is open today, so I figured that while the window is being repaired, we could go pick up the desk."

Charlie stares at her for a bit, and Bella realizes she's supposed to give some kind of response. She nods.

Charlie continues, "Now, I don't know what happened last night, but I know that you didn't mean to hurt me, or damage your room like that. If you're up for it, I'd like to know what you did to your room, and how."

Bella stares down at her half eaten pancakes, tapping her fork against the edge of the plate. This was the moment she'd been waiting for, the moment to come clean to her father, the one person in the world who she had to believe wouldn't turn their back on her.

She takes a deep breath and explains. She tells him everything. About the force from inside of her that had torn her room apart, about the men she and her friends had encountered in Port Angeles, and how the force from yesterday was most likely related to the way she managed to make herself invisible during that traumatic night. She doesn't say anything about vampires, deciding to carry that one burden by herself.

Even though she couldn't tell him everything, she still feels like a weight has been lifted off her shoulders.

* * *

Jacob smoothed down his hair for the umpteenth time that hour, leg bouncing as he glanced at Leah from across the table.

It was Tuesday night, and the night that Leah had agreed to go on a date with him. He'd finished his car over the weekend, forgoing sleep to get it ready to ask Leah out. Taking Bella's advice, Leah was the first person that got a ride in the Rabbit. The timing of the date was little unusual (Jacob had never heard of anyone going out in the middle of the week), but figured that it was the easiest way to avoid prying eyes from the reservation.

Telling his father about the date had been an experience, with his father getting a very sly grin on his face as he slid Jacob fifty dollars. Jacob had tried to give the money back. having saved up his own cash from doing odd jobs around town, but his father had insisted.

Pockets filled with enough cash for a nice dinner and a movie, Jacob had then called Bella to beg for suggestions for dinner. She'd sounded a bit weird on the phone, but had still been eager to help. She'd suggested a quaint little Italian restaurant in Port Angles, and her voice had taken on a wistful tone as she told gave him directions.

"Have you decided yet?" the waitress' voice startled Jacob out of his thoughts.

"I'll have the chicken parmesan with a glass of water," Leah said, closing her menu. Her hair hung in thick waves down her back. With the menu out of the way, the forest green dress she'd worn was visible. It complimented her skin wonderfully, and Jacob was glad his father had reminded him to gather enough wits about him to compliment her earlier when he'd picked her up.

"And you, sir?"

"The lasagna, and water for me as well," Jacob says.

The waitress, Jacob's eyes flick over the name tag that reads Melissa, smiles, takes their menus, and leaves to go put their orders in.

Jacob and Leah are left alone, and Jacob quickly racks his brain for a conversation topic.

"How was your weekend?" He asks, digging his nails in his palm at the weak question.

"It was great," Leah smiles. "Seth and I went hiking in Forks, and we found this really cool meadow. How was yours?"

"Loud. My dad and Charlie spent Friday screaming at the TV, and then on Saturday Embry and Quil came over. Quil pestered me about one of Bella's friends for nearly the entire time."

"Angela or Jessica?"

"Jessica," Jacob says, remembering that Bella had introduced the two girls to Leah. "She and Quil hit it off, even though Quil sucks at flirting."

"You think you're better?"

"You're here with me, aren't you?" Jacob revels in how smoothly the line falls from his lips.

Leah blushes, but she's saved from answering as the Melissa comes back with their drinks. She takes a sip of her water.

"I was really surprised when you asked me out," Leah admits, leaning forward a bit.

"I wanted to ask you out for a long time." Jacob flushes himself. "I was just too nervous."

"What made you step up?"

"Bella," Jacob admits. "For a quiet girl, she can be really assertive when she wants to be."

Leah grabs her glass and raises it up. "To Bella!"

They clink glasses and laugh.

Shortly after, their food arrives.

Leah can't remember the last time she's had so much fun, and Jacob can't believe he didn't pull his head out of his ass sooner. Jacob was fun to talk to, no judgement in his voice, and he eagerly absorbed her words as if everything she was saying was important. His eyes never left her face, and he put his all into making sure she had a good time. At one point, Leah laughed so hard she snorted water out of her nose, and the other patrons in the restaurant shot them disgruntled glares.

Somehow, the two of them had managed to scoot closer to each other as the night went on, until they were close enough to be touching.

As Melissa came to clear their plates and get their bill, Jacob reached under the table and grabbed Leah's hand, and squeezed. She returned the action, and leaned over to press a soft kiss to his cheek.

Jacob paid the tab, and helped Leah put her coat on. Leah smiled up at him, brushing her long hair from her face, cheeks flushed. The two teens left the restaurant, hand in hand, heading towards Jacob's car.

"What movie should we see?" Leah asked, stepping closer so that she could wrap her arms around Jacob's. Jacob welcomed it. "Nothing too scary, I'd like to be able to sleep tonight. And not a romance. God, I cannot sit through two hours of two people being painfully stupid about caring for each other."

Jacob grinned. "How about a compromise? I hear that action movie, _Jumper_ , is pretty decent."

As the two piled into Jacob's car, they were unaware that they were being watched. Several yards away, Paul huffed, digging his nails into the forest floor. He'd been running patrols, and with the absence of the Cullens, Sam had expanded the distance they needed to cover. He'd been running by when he heard Leah's voice. Looking at the Rabbit as it drove away, Paul's stomach twisted uncomfortably. Leah was out on a date with Jacob, he could tell from the glimpse the dress she had on and the restaurant they'd been walking away from.

 _Sam wouldn't like that,_ Paul thought. The Rabbit turned the corner, out of sight as the two headed for the theater. _To hell with Sam. He can't have his cake and eat it, too_.

Paul buried all thoughts of Leah and Jacob deep in his mind, determined to keep it hidden from the pack mind. He may not have been the best person, and he was definitely guilty of being one of the people that harassed Leah on the Rez, but he was capable of change, of remorse. He would keep out of Leah's business and, in turn, do his best to keep Sam out of it, too.

Paul melted back into the shadows of the woods and continued his patrol.

* * *

On the other side of town, Jessica and Bella were sprawled on the floor of Jessica's bedroom. Angela was absent that night, but Bella wished that she was here. Jessica looked exhausted, dark circles under her eyes, and her usually bouncy curls were limp. Bella wasn't sure how to be naturally kind and comforting like Angela, who could always get people to open up. However, it seemed like Jessica wasn't the only one looking rough that evening.

"You alright, Bells?" Jessica asked, lips turning down at the corners. "You look a little, _meh_."

"I'm just really tired," Bella smiled weakly. "I haven't been sleeping well the past couple of days, that's all."

"You gotta start taking care of yourself," Jessica frowned.

"You wanna talk about self care? You look dead on your feet too," Bella grinned, but it quickly fell when Jessica looked away. "Hey, are you okay?"

Jessica was silent. She picked at the carpet, yanking at a loose thread. She shrugged. Jessica thought she had hidden it well, but it seems like she was failing at yet another thing.

Bella scooted closer, knocking her shoulder against the other girl's. "Jess?"

"I just...," Jessica's voice wobbled, eyes shining with tears. "I've been doing so much. Not just this week or this month, but in general. I've spent my entire high school career so far going above and beyond to be the best, to stand out. I've gotten good grades, I've made my resume look amazing by all the jobs, volunteer work, and extracurriculars. And still, the end result is always the same."

"What end result? What are you talking about?"

"Nothing," Jessica said, wiping the tears from her eyes and sniffing. "It doesn't matter. Sorry, I lost myself for a bit. Anyways, get that blue bin from under my bed. Your nails need a touchup."

When Bella didn't move, Jessica grabbed the bin and dragged it to the middle of the floor. Bella watched in silence as Jessica flittered around the room, a ball of seemingly endless energy, but with a droop in her shoulders. Bella floundered as she thought about what to do. Comforting people wasn't something that came easy to her. She cared about Jessica, so much, but didn't know how to articulate that in a way that wouldn't be clumsy, or that wouldn't make Jessica shut down even more.

She bit her lip and let Jessica plant her on a fluffy pillow, dutifully putting her hand on the little table Jess set up so she could paint her nails easier.

Jessica cleared her throat as she sat, pulling Bella's hand a bit closer. She flicked on a lamp and pointed it towards the table. From the bin she pulled a clear base coat bottle, a purple nail polish bottle, and a clear top coat bottle. Unscrewing the base coat, she got to work on Bella's left hand.

Just when the silence was getting unbearable, right as Jessica reached Bella's middle finger, she finally spoke.

"I don't think my parents love me."

Bella didn't know what to say, didn't know how to recover from that shock, but she didn't even need to worry about formulating a response, as Jessica continued, her hand still steady as she moved on to the next finger.

"I mean, maybe they do. Just...not as much as I would like them to. Not as much as I love them."

Finished with the base coat on Bella's left hand, Jessica moved on to the right. She gently lifted Bella's thumb.

"I get the best grades. I give back to my community. I've played nearly every sport Forks High has to offer. Yet, none of it is good enough. Nothing is ever good enough for them. I'm too slow on the volleyball court, not assertive enough on debate team, not smart enough to secure a position at the top of the class -"

Jessica's voice broke. The base coat was done, and after closing the bottle Jessica very quickly swiped at her left eye before grabbing the purple nail polish, and getting to work.

"I don't think I exist as a person to them. It's like I'm a trophy they want to show off to their friends, to prove that their kid is better. And it's funny, because by my parents' standards, I am better than them! But just because I'm the best out of their friend group, doesn't mean that I'm the best in their eyes. Not yet. Not ever, I don't think. And I...I push myself so hard. I used to love school, used to love learning. I had such big plans for myself." She gave a wry smile, smoothing nail polish over Bella's left index finger. "I wanted to go to Stanford, wanted to be a doctor. At least, that's what my parents told me I wanted.

"Remember what I said in the car, that day we went shopping? About trade school? I would prefer that over Stanford. I could make it at Stanford, I know I would...but I don't want to. I don't _want_ to. For the first time in my life, I know what I want. Well, I know what I _don't_ want. And it's that life, the life they carved out for me. I just...don't know how to stop wanting their praise, their affection."

The two girls sat silently as Jessica applied the top coat, and Bella made sure to keep her hands steady so that the paint would dry without smudging.

"You don't have to say anything," Jessica gave a small smile. "I know that was a lot to throw on you, I'm sorry."

"You know Angela and I are here for you, right?" Bella whispered.

"I know," Jessica patted Bella's arm. "And I'm glad you listened. It felt...really good to get that off my chest."

"It's funny," Bella huffed. "All of our parents love how we made them look or what we did for them, except for my Dad."

"God, you're right," Jessica giggled into her hands. "Mr. Swan is our team mascot."

"I think it's great that you're figuring out what you want. Life is too short to live by your parents' script. And if you need someone to be there when you break the news to them, I will gladly sit in, and I'm sure Angela will, too."

"You guys are the best." Jessica kissed Bella's cheek. "Thank you for validating me. I was so scared that I was just overreacting, but I think I'm making the right choice. No more Stanford. No more overextending myself. Just...being me. Jessica."

"You know, I think Jessica is great. What trade schools were you looking at? Did you decide on a field?"

The light returns to Jessica's eyes as she scrambles away to grab a binder from her closet. She swipes the nail polish bottles off the table, and Bella quickly moves her hands out of the way so Jessica can open the binder. Inside our endless forms and documents about the research she's been doing on trade schools. There are sections on nursing, carpentry, construction. Bella smiles as Jessica talks, and she feels like a warmth building in her chest.

Jessica had made it seem like she hated learning because of her parents, but Bella could see now that Jessica had simply hated the pressure her parents had placed on learning. Now, though, talking about her plans, she was lighter. More grounded, confident. Bella loved to see it, loved to see her friend be so passionate and driven.

Jessica's hands gestured wildly as she flipped through the binder, and all Bella could think was _, I love this girl_.

* * *

"Welcome back, everyone!" Ariana settled into her chair with a welcoming smile. Around the circle, everyone was now wearing paper name tags, their names written in sparkly purple ink. "I know you're all probably tired of hearing it, but I have to say this every session: This is a safe space, where there will be no judgement. We are here to heal, to learn, and to grow. There is no pressure when it comes to these sessions. You are more than welcome to share your story if you would like, but you are not required to. Now, let's begin!"

Bella raised her hand, swallowing when all eyes fell on her. Ariana nodded for Bella to start, smiling softly.

"I'm Bella," she said, forcing herself to speak louder than a whisper.

"Hi, Bella." The voices of everyone in the circled chimed in. A few seats down from Bella, Leah sat, giving Bella an encouraging nod.

Bella paused, unsure of where to start. Ariana helpfully suggested, "Perhaps explain your situation a bit, if you're comfortable with that."

Bella took a deep breath, and began. "I used to date this boy from my high school, Edward. He was my first boyfriend. Growing up, I was too busy taking care of my mom and the household, so I never really connected well with other people my age, and I tended to be an outcast. And then I moved to Forks, and the boy that every girl wanted but couldn't have wanted _me_!" Bella huffed a laugh. "God, I thought I was so special. So special that I was ignoring how much of the relationship wasn't good for me."

"When did you start to realize that your relationship with him wasn't what you wanted?" Ariana asked gently when Bella paused.

Bella exhaled heavily, digging her fingernails as she began to explain. It was painful to admit, but necessary. "I don't know if he was doing it maliciously, and I would like to believe that he hadn't meant to treat me this way...but he always made me feel inferior. Weak. Edward acted like I was incapable of surviving without him, incapable of doing basic day to day tasks by myself. He decided when I ate and what, who I talked to, when and where I drove. He even got his family to get involved. He'd have his younger sister, who I thought was my friend, keep tabs on me so he could always know where I was.

"Alice also treated me like a human sized doll. She'd decide what I wore and forcibly take me shopping and do my makeup. Whenever I protested, she would make me feel so guilty that I would just give in. But I was miserable. I don't hate girls that like shopping and make-up, but it's just not something that I, personally, am interested in. And I just wish she could have respected that. I wish I could have stood up for myself."

"Are you no longer in contact with them?"

Bella looked away. "Not...really."

"What does that mean, Bella?" a girl named Melissa asked. "If you don't mind me asking."

Bella blushed and ran her hands over her face. "I...when they first left, I would text, call, and email them everyday. None of them ever answered, because everything was disconnected, but I still have them. Just in case."

"Just in case what?" a girl with dark purple hair questioned. The tag on her chest helped Bella identify her as Alicia. "Are you waiting for them to call you back? You just said they disconnected their phone numbers and emails."

"They might come back," Bella said weakly.

"Can you tell us why you think that?" Ariana wondered. "From my perspective, it seems like they cut you out with no intention of letting you back in. It would be one thing if they texted you every once in a while, but it's been radio silence for months. And an even more important question, why do you want them to contact you? You just said that Edward made you feel inferior, and you described how his actions and those of his sister negatively impacted you."

"I thought they were my family!" Bella cried. "Even though they made me feel so awful about myself. Before I moved here, I had nothing. My mom is the worst, and I was practically raising her. I thought that if I let Edward have control then they'd want to keep me. I keep thinking they'll eventually come back. And I feel like shit when I complain about how they treated me, because it's not like Edward talking down to me is worse than if he had, like, slapped me, or something."

There's silence in the group. Several girls have commiserating looks on their faces, recalling their own experiences with being silent when faced with ill treatment, believing that they were lucky that it wasn't worse.

Carolyn, a thin girl two seats down from Bella, hesitantly clears her throat. She's relatively new to the group, and this was her first time speaking. Her long blond hair is combed in such a way to hide the healing bruises on her neck. "In my personal experience, emotional and mental abuse can just as bad as physical, but that's not me speaking for everyone or giving a general statement about abuse overall. It's just that, for me, at least when my ex hit me, I knew that the bruises would fade, that the cuts would heal. But when he was making me question my sanity...I don't know if I'll ever recover from being mentally manipulated like that. Every second of the day, I find myself questioning my own credibility."

"Carolyn's right," Ariana says gently. "Firstly, there's no "worse" kind of abuse. There is not a competition. People who were physically abused are not more valid than those who experience mental and emotional abuse, and vice versa. As I've stated in prior sessions, all forms of abuse can negatively impact a person's life. I understand what you mean about thinking that Edward perhaps didn't _mean_ to talk down to you or treat you like a child, but the fact of the matter is that he _did_. He _did_ do those things, and he made you feel like you couldn't speak up or discuss it. A relationship isn't about control, Bella. Whether he intended to or not, Edward controlled you, and he had his family help him control you. He may have believed he was doing the right thing, but that doesn't mean that what he was doing was right."

Bella was silent, taking it all in. She didn't want to believe that Edward had purposefully hurt her, hadn't wanted to accuse him of such a thing. However, he had hurt her, whether he meant to or not. When she was with him, it was like she was a child, and he was the exasperated parent. That wasn't a healthy dynamic, and it was actually rather insulting for Edward to treat her like she couldn't survive without him; she had only known him for a short portion of her life, and had survived the past years without him or his family.

"I...may have some issue with self worth," Bella gave a weak laugh. "I tried to argue with Edward all the time about him making choices for me, but he'd kiss me or change the subject. I hated the way he treated me...but I still keep waiting for them to call."

"You need closure," Najah says, directly across the circle from Bella. Her purple sneakers tapped leisurely against metal leg of her chair. "You'll never be able to move on if you keep waiting for them to call you. And you need to stop reaching out to them. Like Ariana said, they could've called you. The phone works both ways. Email works both ways. You'll never truly heal if you keep waiting on them to come back."

"You're right," Bella acknowledged, picking at a stray string that was coming out of the seam of her jeans. The Cullens could have called, visited, _something_. It was so hard to believe that Edward had single handedly persuaded the family to cut contact with her, and it made Bella conclude that they couldn't have possibly loved her as much as they said they did. Sure, the might have loved her in their own way, but they never loved her as much as they loved Edward. And so, of course, when it came time to choose, they chose Edward. "I can't...I can't keep waiting for them."

Bella hadn't actually contacted the Cullens for a while, but had been checking her phone and emails, subconsciously hoping that they'd send something. It was clear now; they weren't going to.

Ariana cleared her throat and took over. "Moving on is hard. Moving on means letting go of the past and working to build a better future. Sometimes, we like to hold on to the past because we're afraid of who we'll be if we don't have that baggage weighing us down. But the people who hurt us, the things that hurt us, will continue to have power over us if we don't let it go. I'm not saying you have to forgive. Rather, let it go. For example, my ex boyfriend is someone I've mentioned to you all. He hurt me, and I let it go. I do not forgive him, but instead, I let go of that pain. Not for him, but for me. He is an abuser, and he is not a part of my past that I can erase, but i can remove myself from that cycle of pain, put it behind me, and move forward."

The girls in the circle clapped, and Ariana nodded graciously.

"Now, let's go around the circle and end today's session with an easy question: what's your favorite color?"

They went around the circle answering the question, and as everyone packed up to leave, Leah appeared at Bella's side. The taller girl nudged Bella's arm with a small smile, the two of them leaving the room together. The community center in was bustling with life, not just with the girls Forks Domestic Violence Support Group. There were some art classes that took place throughout the building, photography, and, Bella noted as she and Leah passed a room, a band. The screechy noises of an unpracticed person on a violin filtered into the hallway.

"I'm proud of you, Bella." Leah said as they got outside.

"Thanks," Bella flushed. "I'm...I'm proud of me, too. I admit I hadn't really expected myself to speak about myself during these sessions. I just thought that I could heal myself just by listening to everyone else. But I'm glad I spoke up. I feel...better."

"What are your plans for the rest of the day?"

"Do some homework and make dinner for my Dad and I. But first," Bella took a deep breath. "I'm going to delete the Cullen's contact information. All of it."

Leah pulled Bella into a tight hug, and Bella choked on a sob as she hugged her back.

"I know that's right," Leah grins into Bella's hair. "Keep moving forward."

The two girls parted ways, Leah waving as she drove off. Bella started her truck and took a deep breath.

"Keep moving forward," she whispered as she backed out of her parking spot. "Keep moving forward."

* * *

"Dad, relax. Seriously, you're stressing me out, and I'm not even the one going on a date."

Charlie huffed, tugging uncomfortably at his dark blue button down shirt. Bella had dragged him shopping one evening after school, and for someone who hated shopping herself, she sure had put him through the wringer. Tonight was his date, and he felt sick to his stomach. He hadn't dated since before Renee, and after she'd left him, he'd been a mess, unable to commit to moving on and accepting that things had changed.

He thought he'd have more time to mentally prepare for the date, but Friday had approached quickly. After the crazy few days that he and Bella had had, he was hesitant to leave her alone for too long. The window and door were easily repaired Monday morning, but he had scrambled to clean the floors before the repairman arrived, not wanting to have to explain the extent of damage that Bella had caused.

Bella knocked her father's hands out of the way and fixed the buttons, arching an unimpressed eyebrow at him. She looked better today, less dead, but Charlie could see that something was on her mind.

"I can cancel," Charlie said. "I can always ask her to reschedule."

 _"Dad,"_ Bella groaned. "I'll be fine! I'm just going to stay in tonight and watch a few movies. Go out on your date! Have fun! And you can tell me all about it tonight. Or tomorrow morning, if you decide to-"

"Okay!" Charlie tugged away, flushing. "When did you get so mouthy?"

"Don't forget the talking points we went over," Bella said instead of answering the question. "Make sure to give her genuine compliments, listen to what she's staying, and stay engaged. And...make sure you call Billy tonight."

Charlie, who had been smoothing his hair down as he looked in the mirror of his bedroom, spun around, mouth agape.

"You told Billy I had a date?!"

"He's your best friend! I didn't think you kept secrets."

Charlie grumbled, knowing Billy had more than likely told Harry, who would have told Sue, and that the three of them would be expecting a full rundown of his date. The worst part about it was that tonight was Friday. The weekend meant that he would be expected at La Push, and he had no valid excuse to get out of it. Maybe he could volunteer for extra hours at the precinct...

"I already told Billy that you're off this weekend," Bella said innocently, moving to the door and leaning against the threshold. "That wasn't a problem, was it?"

Her father's irritated stare clearly stated that it was.

"Smooth out those wrinkles, you gotta go!"

Charlie let Bella usher him down the stairs, and out of seemingly nowhere, Bella pulled out a small bundle of roses. His eyebrows rose as he shrugged on his coat.

"Women like flowers." Bella smiled. She passed them to him, and as he opened the front door, Bella stopped him. "Hey...I'm really proud of you, you know that? Tonight's gonna be great."

"Thanks, Bells," Charlie smiled back. "Stay in the house tonight, okay? I won't be able to focus if you're out at night by yourself."

"Scouts honor."

Charlie left, Bella watching him drive off from the front steps.

* * *

Bella paced around the hallway for twenty minutes, waiting to see if her father would double back. The minutes ticked by slowly, and she strained her ears to hear as much as she could on the road outside.

Her eyes went to the clock. Twenty minutes was up.

Bella sprinted up the steps, heart pounding as she slipped into her bedroom and closed the door. She throws off her pajamas, tossing them on her comforter. Yanking open her closet door, she grabs the outfit she already had neatly folded on a hanger. Bella slips on black leggings, a long sleeve black shirt, black boots, and a dark green raincoat. She pulled her hair into a braid and used her teeth to pry the hair tie off of her wrist to keep the brain in place.

She had promised her father she'd stay in the house tonight, and she had intended to...before she got the note. Bella's eyes flicked over to the piece of paper sticking out from under her laptop. Taking a deep breath, Bella moves to her desk, gently tugging the paper out.

_I'll see you soon._

-V

There was only one person in Bella's life who had a name that started with that letter. Bella shivered, folding the note and stuffing it into the black drawstring bag she had sitting on her desk chair. She threw the bag over her shoulder, and made her way back downstairs as her thoughts raced.

The note had to be from Victoria, it _had_ to be. It had arrived in the mail that morning in a plain envelope, and Bella had quickly shoved it in her back pocket before her father could see and question her. She stomach had been in knots all day as she waited for her father to leave, her mind throwing together a plan that as stupid as it was reckless.

Shaking her head, Bella set the bag down in the hall next to the bowl of keys, and went to go set the scene. She grabbed two cans of Coke from the fridge, and guzzled the first one, ignoring the burn in her throat. The second can, she cracked open and took a few sips from. She set both cans on the table in the living room. Turning on the TV, Bella inserted a random action movie from her father's collection. She tugged out two more movies, cracking open the cases and leaving them next to the cans of coke. Bella didn't plan on being gone long, but just in case, she wanted it to look like she had spent most of her evening in the living room doing exactly what she said she was going to do.

Snatching up her keys and the back, Bella pulled on her hood and left the house.

Her truck came to life noisily. The sound of the engine used to be a comfort, but now it did nothing but make her more anxious. Bella's eyes scanned the entire street, lingering on the woods, as she backed out of the driveway. Her human eyes wouldn't be able to see if Victoria was near, but she couldn't stop herself from looking.

The ride was silent except for the rumble of her truck. Bella had cracked her window down, letting the cool night air calm her down a bit. The clouds in the sky looked heavy, indicating the impending arrival of rain.

A small, barely noticeable break in the trees signaled her turn, and Bella and her truck disappeared into the brush. The thick gathering of trees began to thin, and in front of her was the long, dark driveway of the Cullen residence. Bella pulled into the driveway, backing up and making sure that her car was pointed towards the exit so that she could leave quickly. Bella sat in the car for a bit, looking up at the house.

Bella exhaled shakily and got out of the car.

Memories of the past flooded her mind as her foot made contact with the ground. The house was dark and lifeless now, but she could vividly recall a time when it wasn't. Esme and the others making her food; Edward giving her a tour of his room; the gathering for her birthday.

Bella grabbed the drawstring bag and closed her door. Pulling open the strings, Bella pulled out a crowbar that she'd pinched from the garage, and a flashlight. She put the back on her back and jogged up the steps to the front door. She raised the crowbar, prepared to bash in the glass, and stopped.

Even though she was angry with the Cullens, she didn't want to immediately jump to damage Esme's house. She wasn't that kind of person. Bella huffed angrily as she tried the doorknob, promising that she'd break the door down if she needed to.

She didn't need to.

When she twisted the doorknob, the door swung open easily.

Bella gaped for a few seconds before she realized that _of course_ the Cullens weren't worried about theft. Not only were they rich and able to replace anything that got damaged, but the location of their house wasn't a well known fact. Besides her, she doubted that anyone else really knew where the Cullens lived. If she hadn't come back, the house likely would have remained untouched for decades.

Turning on the flashlight, she stepped inside, closing the door softly behind her.

The main hall of the house contained a few couches and tables, one of the many sitting rooms in the house. The furniture was covered with thick white sheets.

Bella quickly moved through the hall, stepping into the kitchen, one stop of many to exploring the abandoned house. The kitchen chairs were covered with white sheets, too, and all of the cooking utensils could be found in the cabinets as Bella snooped around. Her footsteps echoed as she moved through the house.

Edward's piano, where he'd played the song he'd composed for her.

Alice's room, where she'd used Bella as a living Barbie doll.

Edward's bedroom, the long gray couch still in its corner, the CDs still on the shelf.

A small part of Bella felt vindicated in the perception that music wasn't the same for Edward after their breakup either.

 _Moving on_ , Bella thought, huffing as she came to a stop in front of yet another familiar door. Carlisle's study.

The door opened quietly, and Bella moved the flashlight around to observe the room. It was surprisingly full. She could tell that a few books had been taken, as the bookcase was left quite messily, but many still remained. Bella set the flashlight down on the desk and pointed it at the books. She dragged her fingertips across the spines, reading the titles. A lot of medical books, typical. Historical recollections of art, music, and other historical events, unsurprising. Bella was about to turn away from the bookcase when her eyes caught a book. It was above her head, and Bella instantly knew why her eye had been drawn to it when she stood up straight.

The words on the spine of the book were woven in golden threat, and they read: _l_ _amia_ _doctrina_.

Bella didn't know a lot of Latin, but a lifetime of having her nose buried in books - and the research she'd done when trying to figure out how Edward had stopped the car - helped her recognized the words. _Vampire Theory_.

Bella inhaled sharply as she gently pulled the book off the shelf, filled with disbelief. Surely Carlisle hadn't meant to leave _this_ book behind? Sure, he was probably confident no one would go into the house while he was gone, but he could never be certain. And he could be anywhere on the planet right now; if someone did come into the house and plan to take the book, there's no way Alice's vision would come in time, or that they'd be able to get back in time to stop said person.

"Funny," Bella huffs. "That that person turns out to be me."

Bella suspected that Alice wasn't watching for her future anymore. Alice wasn't her best friend anymore, and perhaps she'd exaggerated her love, but Bella was certain that Alice wasn't so awful as to see her, Jessica, and Angela almost be attacked by men and not do something about it. No, Bella was no longer in Alice's sight.

Perfect.

Bella set the book on the table and hunched over it, grabbing the flashlight to see the pages. The book was written in a mix of Latin and what Bella believed to be Italian, and...Jesus _fucking_ Christ, was that Carlisle's name written at the top of one of the chapters? The next chapter was the name Aro. Her heart raced as she eyed the pages. Is it possible that...she had a copy of the history of _fucking_ vampires in her hand right now? What else could it contain? The names of vampires? Their powers? How they came to be?

Bella shut the book and clutched it to her chest, snatching up the flashlight. The light shone on the Volturi painting, yet another item Bella couldn't believe was left behind in the Cullens haste to get away from her.

Edward had told her of the time Carlisle spent in Italy with the Volturi, and she wondered if this book was his, or maybe his and Carlisle's. Bella maneuvered around the desk, setting the book down on the edge. In her left hand she held the flashlight, and with the right, she touched Aro's painted face. He stood on a balcony, at the very center, three other vampires standing around him. She recognized Carlisle in the back, standing off to the side, as if afraid to be too closely associated with the vampire king.

They looked like gods. Whoever had painted them had also been blown away by their inhuman beauty and grace.

Before, when she'd thought Edward had wanted her to be part of his family, she had imagined herself just as beauty, living with the Cullens forever. She had envisioned herself meeting Carlisle's friends, knowing he had to have made many, as he was the most social vampire out of his entire coven. From what Edward had said, Aro and Carlisle went way back, and Bella had believed he would be someone she would eventually meet after she turned. Now, though, she doubted she would ever -

Bella gasped, jerking away from the painting. In her haste to get away, she nearly tripped backwards over the leg of the desk.

The Volturi were enforcers of the law. The law that clearly stated that humans should not be aware of vampires. A law that the Cullens had broke.

The reality of the situation hit her all at once, and Bella stumbled back against the closed door of the study, sliding down to the floor as her breath quickened.

She began to cry as several things hit her all at once.

Aro was gifted, as Edward had briefly mentioned, able to read all the thoughts a person has ever had with a single touch. He was the leader of the Volturi. Combine those two facts, and one thing became very clear: no one hid from Aro. He could call on the Cullens at any moment, demanding an audience, and how could they refuse? Aro would touch Carlisle, Edward, or any other member of the coven, and he'd know. Aro would know that Bella knew about vampires.

There was no way to ensure that Aro wouldn't come into contact with the Cullens anytime soon. He could call on them tomorrow, next week, a year from now. And then he'd know, and he'd take action. He'd come kill her, and why would he stop there? What was going to stop him from killing her father, too? Or Angela? Jessica? Jake?

Bella began to sob, so angry and yet so filled with despair. None of this would be happening if Edward had just stayed away. Edward _knew_ the rules, he _knew_ she couldn't stay alive and human while she knew his secret, and yet he still let her into his world. What had he expected? That he could date her as she stayed human her whole life? That she'd even be okay with that?

The tears subsided as the rage took over.

How could Edward be so _arrogant_.

Had he truly believed her to be safe? Surely he knew, just as well as the other Cullens, that Alice's visions would do nothing against a call from the Volturi. Being able to see Aro requesting an audience wouldn't change shit. If Aro wanted to see Carlisle, then he would see him. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

Bella trembles as she struggles to contain herself, wondering how she could even believe that she had fallen in love with a person that was permanently stuck at seventeen. Edward had believed that being alive for over a hundred years had made him wiser, and Bella could admit that in some areas in had, but not this one. Instead, when it came to logical thinking about the vampire version of a criminal justice system, he was sloppy. Reckless.

Reckless enough to believe that Bella would be dead before the Cullens ever crossed paths with the royal mindreader.

Reckless enough to believe that Victoria wouldn't come back after they'd killed her mate.

Bella choked out a sob. There went another problem.

Victoria. Bella doubted Victoria would go to the Volturi; the killing of her mate was personal, and she no doubt wanted to carry out revenge herself, but that doesn't mean that there still wasn't a possibility that she'd reach out to them.

Bella sat on the floor for what felt like hours. Her mind raced as she tried to connect dots.

"Come on, Bella," she hissed to herself. "Slow down. Think. Okay. The immediate problem is that Victoria is out there somewhere. She's coming to kill you. She'll no doubt kill Charlie and your friends whether you go with her freely or not. Next problem, the Volturi. They might not know about you yet, since no one has come to kill you, but that doesn't mean they won't ever come. So, you have vampires after you. What can you use to defend yourself?"

Almost immediately, Bella's eyes locked on the thick book on the corner of the desk.

A book about vampires...written by vampires. Surely...surely it could help her stay alive? She couldn't read it now, but she could translate it. Hope filled Bella's heart as she thought about what the book could contain.

How to kill a vampire in a way that wouldn't require superhuman strength or speed? How to outsmart one?

Bella stumbled to her feet, lunging for the book. It wasn't a concrete plan, but it was something. She had to try something, couldn't just let her father and friends be collateral damage in her shitty love life.

Bella looked at the painting one last time.

Aro stared back at her.

She turned away, and raced down the steps.

Bella, mistakenly believing that she had finally outgrown her clumsiness, was quickly proven wrong. At the bottom of the steps, she stumbled , and went flying into one of the covered chairs. She, the book, the flashlight, and the chair hit the floor hard. Bella gasped for air, head pounding as she sat up. _Fuck, that hurt_.

Bella pushed herself to her feet and grabbed the book, crouching to use the light from the flashlight to make sure it hadn't gotten damaged in the fall. As she was examining the book, she noticed a strange shaped shadow caused by the flashlight. She gasped, whirling around, thinking she'd be confronted with Victoria. Instead, she was faced with a toppled arm chair that had stacks of money spilling out of it onto the floor.

Bella stared at the money. She couldn't take it...could she?

 _You're already stealing the family grimoire,_ a voice in her head snickered. _What's a few grand?_

Bella wasn't a thief, hated the idea of stealing this book and the money. But...it would in handy, wouldn't it? What if she needed to go on the run? What if she needed to take people with her, make herself and someone else disappear? Still, she couldn't steal from the Cullens.

 _They're rich!_ the voice snapped. _They've had centuries to accumulate wealth. And besides, they hurt you first, remember?_

It was decided.

In the next five minutes, Bella had stuffed all the money from the arm chair into her draw string bag until it was full, and then began to stuff the pockets of her rain coat. She pushed the chair back into the right position and put the sheet back over it. She stared at the other sheet covered chairs.

It was so funny to think of the Cullens stuffing their furniture with cash, but was also the smart thing to do. After all, it wasn't like the Cullens could keep _all_ of their money in a bank their entire lives without people asking questions. So, wouldn't they have money in the other chairs, too?

 _This is purely for survival reasons,_ Bella reasoned to herself as she raced back up the stairs, going through the closets as quickly as possible to find any available bags. There weren't any in the closets in the bedrooms, but she found two a tote bag and two duffle bags when she ventured into the garage. Bella moved quickly back to the living room, not wanting her thoughts to dwell on the last time she'd been in the garage.

She emptied the cushions of each couch in the room and stuffed stacks and stack of bills into the bags. By the time she'd manage to make the room look the way it had before, she was sweaty, heart racing as she tugged the bags out to her car. The front door clicked shut behind her, and Bella panted as she wrestled her way into the drivers seat, four bags of money and a book stuffed in the cab with her.

Bella swore as she glanced at the clock on the radio in the dashboard. Nearly two and a half hours had passed since she'd left the house.

She threw the truck into gear and sped away from the house, heart racing as she pushed her truck to the limit to get back to the house before Charlie and hide the things that she'd stolen.

When Bella arrived home, she'd damn near broken her ankle jumping out of the car and dragging the bags to her room. She'd had to make two trips, and just barely managed to get the bags to fit in the bottom of her closet.

Bella yanked off her clothes and boots, tossing them on the opposite side of her bed, closest to the window, and tugged on her pajamas. Racing back down stairs, Bella threw herself on the couch in a half sitting, half laying position, grabbing the now flat can of Coke in her hand.

Just as she rewinded the movie so that actual scenes were playing instead of the TV screen being black, she heard a car pull into the driveway.

Bella breathed a sigh of relief. She had been cutting it close, but she made it.

The front door opened, and her father entered. He had a dopey look on his face, and...was that a smudge of lipstick on his collar?!

"I'm guessing the date went well?" Bella smirked, raising her can of soda to him in celebration.

Charlie's face got even redder, and he gave an inaudible mumble as he shrugged off his jacket, unable to wipe the grin from his face.

"Come on, hot shot," Bella laughed, patting the seat next to her. "Tell me all about it."


End file.
